Today, my grandpa forgot that my aunt set up a baby monitor in his bedroom in case of a fall. I’m sitting in the living room with his wife - who is deaf - and I hear him moaning over the baby monitor. My grandfather was jerking off and forgot that someone could hear him. I wish I could forget too. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my aunt had the wonderful experience of hearing my boyfriend and I have a very "satisfying" encounter after we stupidly forgot to turn off the baby monitor. FML
Today, while I was walking to the kitchen, I heard someone on the TV moaning. As I made my way down the stairs, I saw my grandfather quickly change the channel and lean forward. I'm 90% sure I caught my grandpa watching porn. FML
Today, I'm staying at my grandparents' house. I went upstairs to grab my sketchbook to show off to my grandma. My grandpa is half-deaf, which I guess explains how he didn't hear me. I heard him though, jerking off and muttering the most disgusting sexual things about "Tara." I'm Tara. FML
Today, I got to listen while my grandma, who has dementia and therefore a poor memory, explained to me why the old man on TV was a sex god. She forgot everything once she said it. I got to listen to her explanation five times over. FML
Today, I visited my sick grandpa for a few hours in the hospital. His roommate, also an elderly man, wouldn't stop masturbating. FML
Today, I was the only family member available to take my grandad to hospital, after he fell on a bottle in the shower and got it stuck up his ass. Again. I swear we need to start monitoring him in the bathroom. FML
Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML
Today, no one warned me that my grandfather was slipping into dementia. I proudly brought my new baby to meet him, only for him to burst into hysterical tears that I was a teenage whore, who’s now brought shame to the family. I'm 30 and married, but he still tried to hit me with his cane. FML
Today, I decided to surprise-visit my grandparents. After knocking on the door and not getting a response, I opened it and walked in. Upon entering their house and yelling, "Hello", as I turned the corner I saw my near-deaf grandmother folding clothes while watching TV. She was topless. FML
Today, I heard my son losing his virginity. It was hard not to, I’m disabled and need his assistance to get out of bed, so when I woke up I could hear them in the next room. He sounded like a dying cat, plus he cried afterwards, and she had to comfort him. God I wish I was deaf as well as disabled. FML
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Top comments
rotflqtms_ 21
He's a grandpa and can still get it up. If you're a guy, hope it runs in the family so when you're his age, you won't need pills... unless he used pills for that...
jobekka 20
it clearly states that the person who wrote this FML is a woman..
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Comments (1)
rotflqtms_ 21
He's a grandpa and can still get it up. If you're a guy, hope it runs in the family so when you're his age, you won't need pills... unless he used pills for that...
jobekka 20
it clearly states that the person who wrote this FML is a woman..
kfchicken 31
yes but on anonymous posts it guesses the gender, so there's ~50% chance ops a guy
AngelBaby666 12
it does?