Today, I walked in on my roommate mid-wank because I didn’t knock before opening the door. Why was he in my room and using my computer? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in the middle of a wank when my home's back door, which is always locked, suddenly opened and someone walked in. I’m not sure who was more surprised: me or the new maintenance guy who saw me wanking. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML
Today, my roomate took the toilet paper out of my bathroom. I went into his room to look for it, only to find a large wad of it balled up near his laptop and mouse. FML
Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecology exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate was responsible for stealing my socks. When I confronted him about it, he told me that he did it because he likes looking at my bare feet and jerking off into my socks. We’re both guys. FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch, computer next to me, lotion on the floor, and my dick in my hand when my roommate walked in on me. Scared and looking me right in the face he says, "What's for dinner?" FML
Today, I walked into my room to find my roommate's boyfriend trying on one of my pink, lacy bras. My roommate then yelled at me for coming home early. FML
Today, I walked in on my roommate having sex in my bed, because apparently hers is "for sleeping only". FML
Today, I caught my roommate trying to use my flashlight as a dildo. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
Go to Lowe’s or Home Depot. Get a doorknob assembly with a locking key. It takes little skill and not much money and only a screwdriver to replace a non-locking doorknob with a locking one - Don’t ask permission, just do it. Then use it. The common bedroom door knob is intentionally designed to be easily opened from the outside with a small screwdriver or the little “key” that comes with it but this is easily opened when locked. Obviously you roommate does not respect your privacy or possessions. Be glad they didn’t steal anything. And of course change the pass code on you computer and don’t use anything obvious like you name or birthday. When/If you move you can reinstall the original doorknob and take yours with you.
FluffythePink 23
And why didn't you immediately beat him with the nearest blunt object?
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Comments (3)
FluffythePink 23
And why didn't you immediately beat him with the nearest blunt object?
Chazzster 32
Go to Lowe’s or Home Depot. Get a doorknob assembly with a locking key. It takes little skill and not much money and only a screwdriver to replace a non-locking doorknob with a locking one - Don’t ask permission, just do it. Then use it. The common bedroom door knob is intentionally designed to be easily opened from the outside with a small screwdriver or the little “key” that comes with it but this is easily opened when locked. Obviously you roommate does not respect your privacy or possessions. Be glad they didn’t steal anything. And of course change the pass code on you computer and don’t use anything obvious like you name or birthday. When/If you move you can reinstall the original doorknob and take yours with you.
kevinwm0 15
And what was he doing with your underwear?