Today, I saw an adorable girl at the bar and I went to talk to her. I decided to use my cheesiest pick up line to make her laugh. After I said it, she knew who I was. It was my cousin I hadn't seen in 8 years. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty, and asked for her number. She replied, "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML
Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML
Today, I got drunk and tried to talk with my crush. I ended up telling her that she reminded me of my nieces. FML
Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML
Today, I was at McDonald's. I bumped into a guy, and as I was helping him pick up his food, I realized he was cute. I began smiling and I was about to introduce myself, when he began laughing and said, "It's you! I've heard about you!" He left laughing. I still don't know who he is, or what made him laugh. FML
Today, I found out the girl I hit on at the store I work at is my second cousin. FML
Today, I decided to hit on a very attractive girl. I guess I was too drunk to remember it was my family reunion. FML
Today, my friend and I went to a bar for drinks. I noticed this cute girl and went over to say "Hi." I had a great conversation with her and I asked for her number before she left. She passed it to me on a piece of paper with instructions specifying for my friend to call her and not me. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's cousin's birthday party, I was hanging around with his sister as I didn't know anyone. She was talking to some friends when one of them asked her, "So, is your brother still going out with that crazy chick?" Her answer was to introduce me. FML
Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML
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Top comments
LEPOfficer 0
I like how you said "adorable" to keep people from flamin' you for thinking your cousin is hawt.
frootloopkicker 0
I could totally see something like this happening to me... That's what happens when you have a large family where you only see a person once every five to ten years. Definitely FYL.
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Comments (104)
LoveDemon 19
time for someone to get a new pick-up line .... :P
Jimboom 12
Mmm. Keeping it in the family. Nice. Incest, the game the whole family can play. ;)
liveBabylon 0
ahahahahahahhaha yes FTW
andy87 0
That's funy but i don't see how this is an fml....she probably thought you were joking
Kgirl2cute 6
agree with #13 - you could probably pass it off as a joke.
col535 0
did she laugh? and don't feel bad, my friend wants to bang his cousin. I do too though.
Peroxide 3
Incest is best, put your cousin to the test!!!
Shereen15 0
Lmfao at ^^
laurr_rawrs 0
incest ftw. so... how'd it work out after that? ;)
epanssereves 0
Oh man no fair! Someone already used the ''Incest keep it in the family'' line >.> FYL
GreenHacker 0
Did you still get laid?
Flutist 3
With the language you used you must have been at the juice box bar... was she a toddler when you saw her last, because "adorable" is only used for old people dying in the same bed like in the Notebook, fluffy kittens, and people under eight. YDI for not being in bed when you should have been young man and for picking up your eight year old cousin. What was the pick up line: If you were a crayon you would be "Giggle and Happy Purple." Did it hurt when the doctor slapped you in the ass? Because I would like to give you a spanking. Time out. LEts hit the sand box.
col535 0
^^lmao!!! I was thinking the same thing. I'm just suprised it wasn't chuck-e-cheeses.
gargoyle666 5
Isn't this normal behaviour in the US anyway?
GreenHacker 0
Incest? No. You must be thinking of your own inbred country.
Flutist 3
So is telling you to go **** your mother asshole.
perdix 31
Yes, but it always happens one state over. If you live in Texas, incest is rampant in Louisiana. If you are from Louisiana, then everyone from Mississippi is a product of, and a practitioner of inbreeding. If you are from Mississippi, then Alabama is the land of Wincest. Etc.
bandaidface 0
Like everyone else is saying- thank GOD you didn't go home with her. And hey- it wouldn't have been too hard to smooth over. If she knew you from the line, she could have thought you had said it as an inside joke or something. Or, she went home and told everybody that you're a pervert.