Today, two of my friends condemned me for being "narrow-minded", because I couldn't help but laugh at the thought that someone would believe mermaids actually exist. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dad refused to believe that the Animal Planet's mermaid mockumentaries were faked. Instead he got into a huge argument with me, claiming the government is covering up the existence of mermaids and must've threatened the producers to keep it quiet. FML
Today, I babysat for two little girls, who wanted to play 'mermaids'. I smiled, and said that I would love to play with them. The older girl laughed, saying "You can't be a mermaid. Mermaids are pretty." FML
Today, an overweight coworker of mine was saying that her favorite mythical creatures was Mermaids, because she considers them graceful, carefree and aesthetically beautiful, like her. I absentmindedly blurted out, “Not with that body.” The word “Sorry” didn’t cut it for the write up I received. FML
Today, I found out my friends call me 'Shamu the whale' behind my back. FML
Today, I told a friend I had become more religious lately. He immediately started mocking me for being a "stupid creationist bigot." When I told him how offensive that was, he acted bewildered and started condescendingly lecturing me about how "science has proven God does not exist." FML
Today, my friend accused me of lying about being gay. Why? I happen to ship some m/f couples in the works of fiction I follow. According to her, gay people are inherently opposed to anything heterosexual, and therefore it shouldn't be possible that I like those ships. The kicker? She herself is straight. FML
Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML
Today, I found out that my friends have been "fake laughing" whenever I make a joke just so that the situation doesn't get awkward. FML
Today, at a dinner party, someone brought up astrology and I casually said I don’t really believe in it. One guest immediately accused me of being “emotionally closed-minded” while another started defending me like we were in a courtroom drama. I just wanted more soy sauce, not ideological warfare over moon signs. FML
Today, I was having dinner at a long-time friend's place. In a matter of 15 minutes, her mom had managed to establish unequivocally that three kinds of people were ruining the world: vegetarians, atheists, and homosexuals. I'm all three rolled into one. She knows that. FML
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Top comments
Abenti 8
They actually did exist. They went extinct sometime in the 1500s.
buck33 14
Same with the unicorns.
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Comments (62)
whatthefreshhell 15
Replace God with mermaids and I'm in! just kidding, guys.
Bekll 31
I had the same thing happen to me when a friend said Big Foot exists.
MikeFoxtrot01594 11
Replace Big Foot with God and that's me.
emilyjgraham 34
did you just copy what's above?
IamEloise 7
So the little mermaid is all a lie? My childhood is forever ruined.
grtfuldeadlovr 27
Why is this on here
TopBanana20 11
Your user name is says it all, OP. I don't think they called you "narrow-minded" because you simply "laughed". I think you judge them for their beliefs or made fun of them in a very insulting way, if that's the case YDI
NiktoLjubitTibja 2
That's what I was getting at in my reply down below, and I wish I'd seen your comment before I made mine. :P I don't care if someone doesn't believe the way I do; what I care about is when they don't mind their own business about it. My beliefs aren't hurting you, yours aren't hurting me, and there's no reason for us to not get along, especially if we'd been doing so beforehand.
doondagr8_1 9
So what you're telling me is..the little mermaid is make believe?!
Sally2dicks21 8
They do you know. So you are an idiot.
saksxalmo 20
Mermaids make about as much sense as the "Virgin" Mary or zombie Jesus, yet somehow the latter are mainstream beliefs. I never understood that. Maybe we're BOTH "narrow-minded", OP. Hehe.
pradip 26
Tell them about Selkie, which is more believable compared to mermaids.
CMooreButz 8
They did a documentary about mermaids and the proof they found. it was on tv at the beginning of this year, I still have it on my DVR