Corporate frown

Today, my boss sent me a text message saying, "You're fired. Merry Christmas!" FML

Today, my boss told me to go outside and take part in the company's stupid Harlem Shake video. When I declined, he threatened to fire me if I didn't take part. I ended up being the guy who had to furiously pelvic thrust before the music dropped. FML

Dancing King

Today, I was demoted from my job because the security cameras caught me dancing in the elevator, and it was considered "inappropriate behavior." I was celebrating getting a promotion. FML

It's all fun and games until…

Today, I've now had to fire three employees this month alone. Why? Two were caught making TikToks while on the clock, “joking” about stealing customers’ credit card info, and the third posted a video of herself in a street fight while wearing her uniform. It should hurt to be this damn stupid. FML

Today, while at work, I was asked to see my boss. I was informed that the company would be laying off 20 people, and that I was one of them. I was told I could finish off the week, then was sent back to work. Twenty minutes later, my boss walked around and handed us all Christmas party invitations. FML

Today, I found out that my coworker shared a laugh with the boss about setting the office desk on fire (which he actually did), while ten minutes later I was threatened with being fired because I made paper snowflakes and hung a few of them next to the computer. FML

Today, I got a Christmas present from my boss. It was an ab workout video. FML

Today, it's my birthday and I had to work. My boss wished me a happy birthday, and then told me I was fired. FML

Today, my manager rejected my leave application for Christmas. Later I found out that I'm going to be the only employee working at the office during Christmas. FML

The Grinch

Today, after telling my bosses how much I dislike the Christmas holiday, they assigned ME to organize and host a holiday party for our whole company, with a “Mariah Carey Christmas Karaoke.” I hate Christmas. FML