Today, at work, somebody stole my sunglasses. Fed up with the constant theft in my office, I stormed up to my boss, as he had long ago promised to catch the thief. He listened patiently to my rant before pointing out that my sunglasses were on my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boss "borrowed" my prescription sunglasses off my desk. She crashed her car because they made her dizzy, and thinks I should pay for the damages. FML
Today, at work, I was putting away clothes in the Men's department, when a guy came and started shopping in the aisle in front of me. He kept staring at me non-stop. Getting fed up, I said "What are you staring at?" Turns out he was wearing his sunglasses on the back of his head. FML
Today, while out shopping, a middle aged man snatched my sunglasses off my face, threw them off the ground, and stomped on them, saying, "That’s what you get for trying to look cool, asshole!" I suffer from light-induced migraines. FML
Today, for what has seemed to be the hundredth time, my labeled bagged lunch was stolen from the fridge at my workplace. I stormed into my boss's office ready to complain, only to find him eating it. FML
Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
Today, my boss tried to knock down a tower of empty boxes next to me while yelling, "Beat it, nerd!" A box hit my face and knocked my glasses off. I got bullied by my boss. FML
Today, at work I noticed that the last of my pencils had been taken from my desk. I assumed it was the coworker who I've talked to at least ten times regarding taking my stationery. I approached her and, feeling brave, yelled at her in front of the entire office. I was holding the pencil. FML
Today, I finally caught the person who has now and again been stealing my lunch at work for weeks. It was my boss. I awkwardly watched him eat my sandwich while he talked about how he's been "saving money by bringing food from home." FML
Today, I fell asleep while lifeguarding, thinking I could get away with it due to my sunglasses. When I woke up, I saw my boss waving at me. Apparently she'd been trying to get my attention for five minutes. FML
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Top comments
NightmareStalker 0
it happens to all of us ;)
bluegoldfish 7
ohh wow i hate when that happens. like when you get someone to call your phone to find where it is and suddenly it starts ringing from your pocket...or your hand...sigh...
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Comments (140)
zniltiaC 19
Awkward......
Mazi09 0
I've been known to do that. not the bitching out my boss part, the forgetting the glasses are on my
Mazi09 0
.... on my head part. stupid thumbs pressing the send button too soon.
artisticninja713 13
don't feel too bad I've done similar
hasards 8
Meh. happens to the best of us. I've done stuff like that on more than one occasion. Typically I try to keep my cool, but then again, typically, I don't have trouble with people stealing my shit in the first place.
alaskasfml 0
when i got to the part about him promising to catch the thief i thought it was going to be him. but then i finished reading. ydi. check around for your other stolen stuff, i wouldn't doubt it if you misplaced that too. >.>
racermjc 0
sounds like Dwight from the office
izawzom 0
I like your boss
Daviddwd 0
I take it ur a feminist?
McAninch35 9
Uhh... what?
ShutUpPlz_fml 0
you have a good boss if he listened patiently