Today, I recently got out of hospital after suffering a bad head injury. My doctor warned me I might have localised skin numbness, and it turns out I do. In my penis. Can’t feel a thing down there. We discovered this in bed, where nothing could get a rise out of me because it was completely dead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, an accident, which ripped off skin off of one side of my penis (which healed fine) a year ago, now has a side effect. If I sit on a hard chair too long, that area gets numb to the point of being extremely uncomfortable and the only solution is to stand up and rub it until the numbness goes away. FML
Today, I got surgery on one of my hands. I opted for a local anesthetic instead of being put all the way under. I soon discovered my hand hadn't gone completely numb when the doctor started slicing into the finger that needed operating on. FML
Today, I had surgery done to fix an ingrown toenail. When the doctor started cutting the nail, my toe wasn't entirely numb. FML
Today, I found out what it's like to get brain-freeze while recovering from a head injury. FML
Today, I left hospital after suffering a head injury. My neurosurgeon gave my wife a list of potential household changes that needed to be made, otherwise I could have a fatal seizure. We got in the car and she said, "You do realise we aren’t doing a single thing on that bullshit list, right?" FML
Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut on his finger. FML
Today, after getting home from being in the field for a week, my wife who's a nurse, convinced me I had a spider bite on my penis. After rushing to the ER and standing nude in a cold exam room while the ER staff checked me out, I learned it's just an ingrown hair. FML
Today, I was crossing the street and did a full on faceplant. The reason? I pinched a nerve in my foot a couple of days ago, and now it’s completely useless. It’s like walking around with a dead foot. I think I’d be better off hopping on one. FML
Today, after nerve pain and trouble sitting down, I found a lump in my ass crack. My doctor thought might be a tumour or cancer, so I was sent for scans. Apparently my whole life I’ve had an ingrown vestigial tail at the bottom of my spine hidden under the skin. FML
Today, I woke up from a nap and thought I felt somebody's arm in my bed. I frantically start hitting it and start screaming. I soon realized it was my own arm. I'd fallen asleep on it, and it was completely numb, I couldn't feel a thing. FML
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Top comments
Bogrbon 27
I feel for you man. This has to be one of the worst FMLs. Hope it's not permanent.
Charlie Given 28
Ya that can happen with a bad enough head injury. Just give your brain time to heal ,it could take awhile depending on how much damage your brain took. sorry for ya OP I understand your frustration 😕
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Comments (11)
Bogrbon 27
I feel for you man. This has to be one of the worst FMLs. Hope it's not permanent.
Win 9
One of the worst FMLs? No. Tragic as many others - yes.
RichardPencil 32
I know getting bad head could be awkward, but I didn't realize it could lead to injury. Except, of course if you let the giver of bad head know that you think the head is bad.
John Nemeth 14
Might as well cut it off and role play as Varys Too soon?
clover1983 12
But physical contact on the penis isn’t all it needs to respond. So something else is going on.
Jillian Cosby-Kelly 15
yeah... A HEAD INJURY
clover1983 12
Obviously that. But he only states that his penis is numb. Having a numb penis won’t stop blood flow if he is being turned on.
Aiden89 23
Remember that show, Deadwood?
Charlie Given 28
Ya that can happen with a bad enough head injury. Just give your brain time to heal ,it could take awhile depending on how much damage your brain took. sorry for ya OP I understand your frustration 😕
CrimsomCrow 7
This is tragic, my guy. I hope sensation returns over time since the body is awesome at healing itself.
spinspinsugar 12
idky 41 people think ydi, it's not your fault
momth3penguin 4
Maybe that is a sign it’s time to focus on her?