Today, I put aside my weekend plans to help my aunt with the extermination guy spraying her new house down to prevent cockroaches. After he left, my aunt asked me to go in and turn off the lights because the fumes were very deadly. If I chose not to, she would tell my mom I did nothing all day. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom is on vacation and I’m taking care of her pets. I also get to clean the entire house. No, she didn’t ask me to do that. It’s just that I had to hold my breath every time I opened the fridge, and there is no surface clean enough to actually touch, so I simply couldn’t help myself. FML
Today, I poured gas around my house for pest control. I can still smell it from inside. FML
Today, after months of my girlfriend crying about cockroaches, I finally called and paid for an exterminator. Now she's furious at me for "making decisions for her" and she keeps pointing out that, since she owns the house, what I did was technically illegal. FML
Today, one of my clients fired me from my cleaning job, all because I had to cancel last minute after I had to drive myself to the hospital with a severe allergic reaction. She screamed at me until I hung up on her. She's my aunt and godmother. FML
Today, my aunt asked me to babysit my cousin. She gave me a warning that he says he's allergic to foods to get out of eating them. When I brought out my homemade cooking, he told me he was allergic, so I made him eat it anyway. Turns out he WAS allergic. FML
Today, despite the fact that I'm really sick, my mom insisted that I come home and help babysit my cousins this weekend. When I got there, everyone else took off to do "errands," leaving me with three hyperactive, howler monkey-like children to deal with. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach ache and had some pretty bad gas at work. I tried to head down to the basement for a while to allow my coworkers to continue in peace. About an hour after I came back up, my boss called pest control due to the horrible smell that "must be dead rats". FML
Today, I set aside an entire week off to watch my parents' house while they went on vacation. I'd only just got here and they'd barely left when the hospital called. My drunk uncle died from a concussion, so my parents cancelled everything. I feel bad for my aunt, but my boss knows where I live, and my dad's an ass. I'm trapped. FML
Today, my mom decided to have a get together at my house while I was at work. When I came home, she pulled me aside and asked me to pretend to be her maid. FML
Today, due to the high pollen count and despite taking hay fever medicine, I passed out in the bathroom from not being able to breathe. My mother accused me of doing it on purpose to make her late for work. FML
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Top comments
cutycat136 28
I don't think it should matter if you did anything at all of not. You put off something you were going to do to go spend time with your aunt instead. That seems like a pretty good thing all on its own doesn't it?
confusedAsFuck 34
No good deed goes unpunished, right?
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Comments (60)
confusedAsFuck 34
No good deed goes unpunished, right?
thefmlman2011 37
erm, what?! I think that'll be tge last time you help your aunt.
Yastafari 16
Well...I know who's having a cockroach sandwich for lunch tomorrow
DippinGrizzly907 27
I have this weird gut feeling that #43 might just be OPs Aunt 0.0
iPixelCheese 19
Your aunt is a bitch
CanisInfernus 12
Tell your mom about the situation?
ohjoy15 33
Your aunt is an unappreciative/blackmailing bitch. Lesson learned hey? If she tells your mom, you could call the exterminator guy to verify your side of the story if you needed to...?
invadermaythe1st 35
He already left by then.
cutycat136 28
I don't think it should matter if you did anything at all of not. You put off something you were going to do to go spend time with your aunt instead. That seems like a pretty good thing all on its own doesn't it?
gosh_mate 30
Never give in to blackmail. Especially if it puts your health at risk! If your relationship is good with your mum she'll believe you. If not, at least you know you did the right thing.
ThePaperDragon 31
I would have taken my chances with my mother. Having reasonable parents does wonders in those situations.
ohSNAPyall 27
Don't breathe in poison to save your aunt a little on her electric bill. That is completely unreasonable.