Today, my daughter's school called to inform me that I needed to bring her some sneakers. Not feeling like driving the 15 minutes to her school, I told them I was away from town. Then I realized I was on my house phone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, since I'm still recovering from my surgery and can't drive, my daughter drove me to the doctor. When I was done and walked outside, she was nowhere to be seen. Then I got a text, saying, "Sorry, I forgot I have to be somewhere." The closest bus stop to our house is miles away. FML
Today, my parents left for work before I had to leave for school and I decided to skip. I stayed by the phone, expecting the school to call so I could pose as my parent and excuse my absence. The phone rings and I pick up. It's my Mom, calling to leave my dad a message on the machine. FML
Today, I got a call from my kid’s school, saying my daughter had a minor accident on the playground. When they asked her who to call, she'd said, "My mom’s probably in a meeting. Call the pizza place, they always pick up." FML
Today, I had to go to my daughter's school because she hasn't been going to class. Her teacher seemed surprised to see me with my husband when we arrived. Apparently I "died" recently and my daughter has had extra responsibility around the house, hence why she doesn't come to class. FML
Today, I went to work 300 miles away from where I live. I couldn't find my customer's address, so I decided to call him. I'd picked up my wireless house phone instead of my mobile. FML
Today, I made the long drive to work, got out of the car, and realised that I'd forgotten to put shoes on before I left the house. FML
Today, I noticed that my mom had left the house without her cell phone. I called her phone to let her know she forgot it. FML
Today, my mom was on the phone while we went grocery shopping. Apparently, her phone call was more important because she just left me stranded in the store. FML
Today, my daughter asked me if I could have the kids overnight, even though I’d babysat all day, all because she just got home and was too tired to make the drive to pick them up. She only lives two minutes away. I can see her house from my bathroom window. FML
Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML
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Top comments
HuskyButt 0
"I lied, just because I am lazy, but I couldn't even do it right." Oh yeah, obviously your life is terrible.
babygraprefruit 0
Mother of the year of the year award goes to... (drum roll) ...Not you, you lazy bitch.
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Comments (212)
Sparkiee93 3
lol you're a jerk xD
ninjasmurf 0
lazy lazy u just go die..
ilcmj_fml 2
selfish much? it's just a 15 min ride. YDI for being a selfish bitch.
CitizenSnipz 0
Fail. Jerk. Soon to be the top flop! YDI. they mightve not noticed though.
IambecomeRAWR 0
to be as nice as i possible can, you seem too stupid to be having children... how can you be passing on genes like that?
AyeOhChelsea 0
The FML doesn't say the daughter needed the "...'specialized' shoes..." for gym, another activity, or whatever else you can think of, now you're the one adding information to the FML. You are reading way to much into this. Hahahahaha, this FML is horrible, bad mommy...You Deserve It!
DecayDance_fml 0
You couldn't be bothered to drive 15 minutes for your daughter? Your life does suck, but that's just because you're a jerk. I feel sorry for her.
heystephanie 0
Even if the child is a teenager, that doesn't give the OP an excuse to be so selfish and not want to drive fifteen minutes to give her kid a pair of shoes. Yes, if it were a teenager they should know to wear the right shoes. However, teenagers are also human and do also sometimes forget things. I forgot a book at school one morning in the process of getting ready for the hour long drive to my school, and my mother still went out of her way to get the book to me after she got off of work. No, she didn't have to do it, but she did because she is my mom and cares enough about me to help me out if she can. If I forgot to take the right shoes to school and my grade depended on it, then of course my mother would try to get them to me.
Firesprite2009 0
Yes, but why the bloody hell would your grade depends on SHOES? I think you're missing the big picture here.
Mr_Kennedy 4
Pathetic bitch. Why would you not want to help your own daughter? I'm guessing she brought only boots to school.
Docsecret 0
You should be ashamed of yourself.