Today, I decided to snack on some M&M's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my M&M's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the M&M off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an M&M. It was a dead beetle. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was eating chocolate chip cookies around the house and saw a chocolate chip on the floor. Not wanting my dog to eat it, given that chocolate is poisonous for dogs, I swiped it up with my finger and put it to my mouth. It was then that I realized it was a stub of my dog's poop. FML
Today, my roommate left a bomb looking package of cookies on the kitchen counter. My sweet tooth got the best of me and I made that split second decision of, "Oh, I'll just have one." Halfway through it, I noticed the fine print, "For dogs" on the package. FML
Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML
Today, I bit into a cereal bar and thought the inside was oddly damp. I took a look at it and saw a maggot worm wriggling around. Its friend was in my mouth. FML
Today, instead of reaching for some unhealthy food, I tried to eat some dates instead. It was all fine until I bit one in half and saw a rather large, squirming maggot inside. FML
Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML
Today, I was feeling down and decided to eat one of my roommate's chocolate Pop-Tarts to cheer myself up. I took a big bite and thought it tasted "off". It was full of live maggots. FML
Today, I noticed my dog chewing on something while on the couch. It looked like a wash rag of some sort, so I grabbed it from my dog. It wasn't until after I picked it up that I noticed it wasn't a wash rag. It was a small, dead bird. FML
Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML
Today, I woke up late and grabbed what I thought was a granola bar on my way out. It wasn’t until I was halfway through eating it that I realized it was a dog treat. I had the godawful taste in my mouth all throughout the day, despite several cans of Pepsi and Mountain Dew. FML
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Top comments
MKC_fml 0
snatching it off the floor so your dog doesn't eat it....good. Popping it in your mouth before looking at it....not so good.
betsymonty 0
And the worst part? A dog wouldn't get sick from a single M&M.
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Comments (194)
lolwhat_fml 0
Cant you tell that chocolate doesnt have legs? and a head ?! wtf xD
Chantal1 0
Thats my worst nightmare..now.
Zwink 0
you dumbass, you don't eat m&m's off the floor that your dog has been sniffing so you definitely deserved it.
Quinnjamin 0
That would've been worth it if for some reason you were eating an onion and dropped some of it.
Aflacduck 0
People are so stupid. DOGS ARE NOT "ALLERGIC" TO CHOCOLATE. There's a chemical in chocolate that is difficult for a dog to digest. That being said, no matter the dog size, a single M&M would have done NOTHING AT ALL. Dogs are actually much better at eating chocolate than people think, it's only large amounts (depending on dog size) that can cause problems.
FMLisshat 0
lol. you made my day bub=J
4ndr34 0
So do you swallow the beetle after you realize what it is, or spit it out and face the thing that was just in your mouth?
751991 0
I have to agree with #87. As a veterinarian, I can say first hand that the whole lethal chocolate fear is a myth. Chocolate come from the cocoas plant and straight cocoa is a drug, even for people. If we were to give a dog straight cocoa, yes, it would certainly kill them- it would be like giving them cocaine or speed. But we as humans also can't ingest straight cocoa without feeling ill-effects and therefore, all of the chocolate that we eat is in very diluted forms. The darker the chocolate is, the higher percentage of cocoa is in it. If a dog were to eat a single M & M, or a whole bag for that matter, all they would develop would be a taste for your candy and no death would come of it. However, if you gave them a whole pack of baker's chocolate or a whole can of cocoa powder, that could prove very harmful (although my thirty pound dog got into a can of cocoa powder and lived to tell the tale...). I hope this clears the misconceptions up!
JackFrost 0
If your dog was "sniffing" a piece of chocolate that was on the floor, why would you immediately eat it? It's a freaking M&M, just throw it away. Your dog isn't going to leap through the air to grab it if you don't instantly stuff it in your mouth. Fail.
tha_AZN_NvAZN 0
lol u deserve it for being greedy...