Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff
United States
All over the place
Today, I was pulled over and administered a sobriety test due to an officer's suspicion that I was driving under the influence. I was completely sober, and, apparently, I suck at driving. FML
Top comments
saIty 17
Officer, I swear to drunk I'm not God.
TipOfTheHat 10
Take driving lessons
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Comments (40)
kathryn14 19
This is not an fml
Stalkerloo 11
Well, it's up here isn't it?
Lucia_Malpense 14
I really want to know what she said now.
CCSA 12
62 - I second that.
kathryn14 19
I just said it wasn't really an fml.. Haha I just thought it was lame. My bad I guess.
Lucia_Malpense 14
Well, apparently if you comment about wanting to see what a moderated comment says, your comment gets deleted. Anyone else think that the FML staff are secretly evil overlords, who want us to think that there's nothing wrong when in reality there's everything wrong?
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
Do like they did in Bridesmaids!
lolkaela 6
I don't think it's ever good advice to tell someone to follow something that they did in that movie...
RpiesSPIES 27
Someone actually watched that movie?...
sarah6786 14
Never heard of it.
buck33 14
I liked what they did in Tommy Boy.
GirlYouNasty 11
33- BEES! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE! YOUR WEAPONS ARE USELESS AGAINST THEM!
HKCgrimmjow 15
Tommy boy is a fking awesome movie. Just sayin.
2pepper3 10
Suck it up.
Clioo_fml 17
Exactly. There are people who have bigger problems than simply "bad driving." Besides, practice makes perfect.
TipOfTheHat 10
Take driving lessons
kenleybunch 15
I have a feeling it's an asian woman.... Nothing will help :p
LouisianaBob 9
Yeah, I don't feel safe on the road with people who drive like they are drunk. OP needs some lessons.
lilhellian 27
Could have been worse.. You could have been clumsy to where you failed the test...
TheZee 12
Maybe it's just me, but I personally would rather fail the driving test and practice more... Rather than passing the test, get my confidence built up, then get pulled over only to be told I drive like someone drunk O.o
lilhellian 27
I meant the field sobriety test.. The whole walking the line and chiz..
lolkaela 6
Well nowadays there's the breathalyzer, and that's pretty damn hard to fail while sober.
lilhellian 27
Still works here and I doubt that it's impossible to fail while sober..
grafeety 9
There's a few ways you can fail sober, for example alcohol based mouthwash. Another common example is somebody drinking one beer, which would normally be the legal limit, and then breathalyzing quickly after drinking said beer. Especially because limits are getting so low.
tacojauns 45
At least you didn't get a ticket?
sarah6786 14
Maybe they got a ticket for reckless driving.
tacojauns 45
that's why i put the question mark
ma12r 22
I feel your pain OP me too it's k we can take cabs together!
newbiehere99 6
Noor, #8 was completely sober, apparently he sucks at typing ...
ma12r 22
hey now I was only slightly hungover.
Stalkerloo 11
I can't be the only one wishing he made his name Spongebob, can I?
lilhellian 27
Damn it. Now that you said it, I'm thinking it to.. D:
BntyHntrSeattle 30
14- I'm not usually that asshole grammar nazi, but seriously, adding an extra "o" to "to" is not that hard. Thanks.
Bullpine 11
Look at the bright side OP! You aren't in trouble for drunk driving.
estes816 9
I hope you wear your seatbelt then!