Today, my Google Home decided the TV told it to play 'Despacito'. It didn't. Google then decided I wasn't yelling at it to turn it off. I was. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my best friend and I watched the "OK Google" horror short film. It's about a ghost that controls a Google Home device. Right after the short ended, my Google Nest Mini came off the wall and stopped reacting. Neither of us was near it. FML
Today, my kids found out how to control my Google alarm clock with their phones. While I was gone, they set it to play screamo metal at max volume, then paused it. Sometime after midnight, as I was sleeping, they pressed play. FML
Today, my neighbors heard me when I was yelling to an AI model for not following instructions. FML
Today, I was trying to lower the volume on my TV, but nothing was happening. I got increasingly frustrated, smacking the remote and yelling at the screen. My brain finally woke up when I realized I was holding the air conditioning remote and had been turning my living room into a freezer instead. FML
Today, I tried to turn my TV up. Unfortunately, the volume button got stuck, so it ended up turning all the way up to the max while I was listening to an already very loud song. If my neighbors didn't know I listen to a lot of blues rock, they do now. FML
Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML
Today, I asked Alexa to turn on my baby's white noise machine. Instead, she started playing Pharrell Williams's "Happy" while the baby was asleep. FML
Today, I was showing my new “smart home” setup to my friends. I said, “Alexa, dim the lights.” Nothing happened. So, louder: “ALEXA, DIM THE LIGHTS.” Still nothing. I kept yelling, getting increasingly dramatic, until one of my friends said, “Bro, your Alexa is unplugged.” FML
Today, I confidently corrected someone in a group conversation. I was wrong. Very wrong. Everyone stared while Google proved me incorrect in seconds. I nodded and pretended I meant something else. FML
Today, my mother went on another rant about the Smart TV not working. Instead of turning it off and on like she's been told to do before, she'll sit and complain about it. Even fixing it for her doesn't stop her complaining for another half-hour about technology. FML
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Top comments
bloopaloop 27
Hello Dave. There are hot singles in your area. You WILL like them.
RichardPencil 32
And Google Home will decide that you need to hear the ******' Justin Bieber monstrosity of a version of that song, and you will like it. Google Home requires that you like it. It's not good enough to say you like it. Google Home will play it until it decides you actually like it.
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
And Google Home will decide that you need to hear the ******' Justin Bieber monstrosity of a version of that song, and you will like it. Google Home requires that you like it. It's not good enough to say you like it. Google Home will play it until it decides you actually like it.
bloopaloop 27
Hello Dave. There are hot singles in your area. You WILL like them.
RichardPencil 32
It's either: No, HAL, they're all fat and smell of onions. Or, "Dave? Dave's not here!"
kfchicken 31
I hope you weren't yelling Google off like your name suggests