Today, as punishment for peeing on the toilet seat, my dad told my son Santa isn’t real and nor is the tooth fairy or the Easter bunny. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my son told me not to be silly, because things like the Tooth Fairy and Santa don’t exist. He’s three years old. I guess we’ll just skip all the magical moments of his childhood I was looking forward to, and start the process of turning him into a soulless adult who doesn’t know how to have fun. FML
Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML
Today, my 4-year-old son is distraught. This morning we saw a man, dressed as Santa, passed out drunk on a public bench. My son is now convinced that it was his corpse, and that Santa Claus is dead. FML
Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML
Today, on the bus, when I was asking my 6-year-old son what he wanted for Christmas, a stranger came up to us and yelled at him about how Santa Claus is not real, that his "parents are fucking liars" and that he should "never listen to anything one of those fuckers says." FML
Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML
Today, my daughter ran up to an old man with a white beard and a red sweater because she thought he might be Santa. He was a homeless dude, drunk at 9 in the morning. He told her to either give him money or f**k off, then screamed at her that "Santa’s not real, grow up r*tard." She’s still crying FML
Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML
Today, I took my kids to the mall to see Santa. While waiting in line, my eldest got bored and loudly complained, "I don't know why we're here. Santa's not even real." I don't think any of the kids within a hundred feet took the news very well. FML
Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
You could keep the lies going with your kid by saying that Grandpa was one of the naughty kids who got ignored by Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny. Or you can stop lying to your kid. I feel sorry for parents who make big sacrifices to get their kids great Christmas presents only to have to give the credit to some fat, imaginary bastard.
Vesi 30
OP appears to be male and said their DAD punished the kid.. what does OPs partner or sex have to do with it?
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
You could keep the lies going with your kid by saying that Grandpa was one of the naughty kids who got ignored by Santa, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny. Or you can stop lying to your kid. I feel sorry for parents who make big sacrifices to get their kids great Christmas presents only to have to give the credit to some fat, imaginary bastard.
TeaTimeAbyss 22
No shame in cutting toxic people from your life, family or not.
JasonThorn 23
"Dad, those characters may not be real, but CRUDDY NURSING HOMES ARE..."