Today, my tonsils swelled to roughly the size of golf balls. My mom refuses to take me to the hospital because she's convinced I got it from kissing someone, and until I "fess up", she's not budging. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I have an excruciatingly sore throat due to chronic canker sores around my uvula. Every bite of food I swallow brings tears to my eyes. I had enough of dad calling me a wimp at dinner over it and shoved my food onto his plate. He's now faking allergies to food we've had for years, just to take the piss out of me. FML
Today, after years of having seasonal allergies and months of having my throat close up, my mom agreed to see a doctor, only to insult me in front of the doctor, saying I just find new ways to make their lives harder and I'm probably making it all up. FML
Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Today, at the age of 27, I learnt that your tonsils aren't the dangly bit at the back of your throat. I work in healthcare. FML
Today, I got a one-inch fish bone stuck in my throat. I went to the doctor, who claimed he couldn't see the long white thing embedded next to my tonsil. He charged me $70, and told me to eat some bread. I had to pull it out myself with a pair of tweezers. FML
Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was the flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML
Today, I woke up with my eye swollen half shut. To spare the embarrassment, I asked my mom if I could stay home from school. She said no, but also attempted to make me feel better by saying that with my eye, my acne was unnoticeable. FML
Today, I'm stuck in bed with a fever, aches, and nasty cough. My kids and husband had it too, and kept coughing without covering their mouths, despite my asking several times so I wouldn't get sick. FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Today, I'd finally had enough of feeling awful and went to urgent care. As it turns out, the reason my throat was sore was because I have a sinus infection. The doctor explained my nose is producing pus, and that's what I'm swallowing and coughing up. Yuck. I also have pink eye on top of that. FML
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Top comments
Treffersonn 0
Call 911 genius
Mirorbo 27
Just lie so you can get the medical attention! Groundation is a lot nicer than possible death from not being able to breathe!
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Comments (362)
hardcoded 1
Tell her it was from giving head instead.
deadbabyjesus 2
sorry but your mom is stupid. when you die, yes when, she will realize this. if you get appendicsidious you better hope she docent blame it on sex lol.
WolfGirlKana 2
Were you trying to spell 'appendicitis'? Because if you were, you did a terrible job of it.
CoyoteOldOne 17
There are all sorts of things that can cause your tonsils to swell up that have nothing to do with kissing anyone. Severe swelling in the throat can be life threatening, regardless of the cause. If you are underage, and you have a serious condition, and your parents won't get you medical treatment, see if you can enlist the help of another family member. If not, call child protective services. If you have a high fever, severe pain, trouble breathing, or if there are pale spots on the back of your throat, it could be something like strep throat, which can be treated with antibiotics, but can become dangerous if untreated.
jessie123246 2
That happens to me sometimes also. Very annoying
DarkAngel4010 0
Wtf
Psycho_Babydoll 26
What the **** is wrong with your mom?! I had glandular fever once and yes, it was from my ex, but even with all the different kinds of pills and medicines I had to take every day the pain was excruciating. FYL, and get help from someone other than your stupid mom.
fredman0000 6
My mom did the same thing but I was four
fredman0000 6
That will kill you
anna15243 6
then just fess up
dme93 5
Say that you did and give a random name?