Nearly FMLs

By Kelsie Lynn Christensen - 06/03/2019 16:34 - United States - Pomona

Today, I was passing a park in the car with my dad. An adult homeless male was on the side and took a shit out onto the curb, and we both saw it firsthand. I am now scarred and can’t get the image out of my mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 7

By Anonymous - 06/03/2019 19:43

Today, my fiancé told me he doesn’t want to go to my brothers wedding. It’s tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 3

By cydia123 - 06/03/2019 13:17

Today, I was in the shower and had shampoo in my hair. Some went in my eyes so I couldn’t see. I suddenly had the urge to pee so I let it all out. It wasn’t until I got out and dried my face that I realised how terrible my aim was. I’d peed outside the tub and all over the floor. I’m pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6

You deserved it 18

By whatever - 06/03/2019 02:00

Today, like any other day, I am married to a narcissist who doesn't have a job and never makes any efforts as a father or a husband yet continuously has new and new expectations, requirements and remarks for the way I should behave around him and pouts like a schoolgirl when I fail to deliver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 480

By stupid bitch - 06/03/2019 00:14

Today, my father continues to yell at me for not wearing a bra. In my own room. Apparently, he’s “uncomfortable” and I’m unsure if he’s looking at my chest or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19

You deserved it 1

By Nickiej - 05/03/2019 23:59

Today, the sewer outside overflowed into my basement through the shower & toilet. My house reeks of shit and it will take days to clean and air out and thus have to move back in with my parents till it’s clean and livable again…FML

I agree, your life sucks 17

You deserved it 0

By BoyD1 - 05/03/2019 21:34

Today, I just bought a car and promised my sister I’d pick her up from work when she finishes, my car battery died and my sisters phone too, it’s been 4 hours since she finished work and she’s not home yet, I think she’s still waiting for me FML

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 2

By Anonymous - 05/03/2019 20:10

Today my best friend excitedly told me she booked a surprise trip to NYC for her and her bf. When I asked when she was going, she said March 29-31. My bridal shower is on the 31st and she refuses to rebook her trip. Shes known about my shower for a month now. Currently taking bff applications. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13

You deserved it 3

By 2shack - 05/03/2019 19:10

Today, I received a letter from the insurance company outlining the renewal costs for the next year. It’s around $1,500 more than it was previously due to my wife driving our vehicle into the retaining wall. I’m not sure how I’m going to pay for it and she doesn’t have the money to help out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 1

By Anonymous - 05/03/2019 05:20

Today my dog decides to take a pee in the bed while I’m sleeping, I thinking it raining because my window was open, than I caught the smell and heat and literally cry as I woke up in a puddle of pee from a 100lb dog.. needles to say everything when in the trash even the mattress... FML

I agree, your life sucks 11

You deserved it 4

By ImDeadInside - 05/03/2019 04:51 - Lebanon - Beirut

Today I discovered I don’t have the financial resources to go to therapy. I also found out that I need to go to therapy for depression and anxiety. I don’t know what to do with my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 0

By Hayden=WorstLuck - 05/03/2019 02:00

Today, it's been almost 3 weeks since Christmas. It's also been almost 3 weeks since I sliced my thumb open on a (gift) knife from one side to the other and required 6 stitches. On top of that, no insurance means two grand in debt that I don't have.... FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 230

You deserved it 244

By sickly - 04/03/2019 14:40

Today I went to the doctors and they tested me for the flu. It came back positive, I came home and laid down right away. I feel like a train has hit me and my sinus pressure hurts my entire face. My sister in law decided to blast music one room over and refuses to turn it down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 0

By pissed off - 04/03/2019 14:21

Today I came home to cook dinner, I also I live with my boyfriends family due to my own family issues. I walked in to see my boyfriends younger sister and her friends eating the food I was gonna cook, I even texted her early on and told her I was cooking that. His family doesn’t see the issue, FML

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 2

By martini - 04/03/2019 01:14

Today, I performed a 57 minute children’s show. I don’t leave the stage until the show is over. There was a dog in the front row & I’m EXTREMELY allergic to dogs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 1

By Ferniferousfern - 04/03/2019 01:11

Today, it's been 22 days since I ordered a pack of energy drinks online. Delivery was scheduled almost 2 weeks ago, and like customer service, my package is nowhere to be found. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 8

You deserved it 4

By mwn - 03/03/2019 17:22

Today, I asked the (rather clingy) guy I was formerly dating why he dumped me. I thought I had done something to scare him away. Why did he do it? Well, apparently because his own clinginess scared himself and he has commitment issues. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 0

By Never Getting Married - 03/03/2019 16:00

Today, my Grandma got engaged to her boyfriend of one year. Meanwhile, I'm still playing house with my Baby Daddy of three years. Starting to think he will NEVER pop the question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 073

You deserved it 994

By "Evan Swaney" - 02/03/2019 18:00

Last month I pulled a prank on my co-worker by putting red pepper flakes in his water. He responded by strangling me to the point of blacking out right in front of our boss. Today I found out one of the co-workers I'm close with still keeps in touch with him and updates him about everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 1 470

By gerbell - 02/03/2019 05:34

Today, my mom has been yelling at me, cursing me out, and generally making my life a living hell for the past two weeks. My horrible crime? I missed a comma in a text message I sent her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14

You deserved it 0

By Plusdeconnexion - 02/03/2019 04:00

Today, we have lost our internet connection for whatever reason. That means my husband and I have to eat without watching TV, and doing so we realize that we have nothing to say to each other anymore. I think we are going to divorce if we don't get back our connection quick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 561

By Anonymous - 01/03/2019 17:00 - United States - La Vista

Today, my mom screamed at me for an hour for giving my sister an STD. Not only am I a virgin, I'm an only child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 916

You deserved it 57

By Flossin - 01/03/2019 04:31

Today after a month or two of slow shower drainage and draino not working, the plumber came while I was at home. He pulled out a huge wad of floss n gunk and told ME not to put floss in the drain. My dad had been flossing in the shower and putting down the drain instead of throwing it away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 0

By "Manuella Monteiro" - 28/02/2019 21:35

Today, a male colleague asked to borrow a lighter, I reached in my pocket and gave it to him, only to later realise I gave him a tampon I had been carrying around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 3

By kita - 28/02/2019 17:37

Today, I was having dinner with my boyfriend’s parents. They took my ignoring the mashed potatoes on my plate as a sign that I hate their cooking and therefore hate them. No, I just can’t stand mashed potatoes, period. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11

You deserved it 3

By Anonymous - 28/02/2019 06:30

Today, the love of my life decided to be friends with benefits. I was thrilled. The next day after he didn't show up for it, he said we couldn't because he didn't want to be what he was before. Having sex with him was on my bucket list. He's that amazing and we have never actually did it full on.FML

I agree, your life sucks 5

You deserved it 6

By smh - 28/02/2019 00:04

Today,I was called down to the deans office (high school,junior) and he showed me a math test I took last week. APPARENTLY me writing out a question from a previous test to help me work out the problem was considered cheating. So now I have 3 detentions and a 53%, I had to get a 0/66 on the test.FML

I agree, your life sucks 15

You deserved it 0

By Anonymous - 27/02/2019 17:35

Today, while trying to insert some new dental crowns, my dentist managed to pull out my other crowns from different teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 0

By godoftoast - 27/02/2019 12:03

Today after thinking my wife and I had reconciled after affair a year ago, she told me that she wants a divorce and it has nothing to do with her affair partner being single...FML

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 0

By "Jason Daniel" - 27/02/2019 05:44

Today, I received a text from this girl I've been talking to about starting a relationship with. The text told me she has met someone else and that's why she has been avoiding me for the last week but the concert she was at was amazing and wished I was there with her...FML

I agree, your life sucks 11

You deserved it 0

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The Top

Today, my fiancé left me waiting at the train station for two and a half hours because he offered his ex-girlfriend a lift to her friends wedding that was a few cities away. I normally wouldn't have minded, but I'm 6 months pregnant and it was pouring with rain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 894

You deserved it 5 675

Today, my fiancée's OCD hit a new low when she screamed at me for flicking the light-switch off "the wrong way". This led to her flicking it on and off about a dozen times, followed by a twenty-minute lecture on how to do it "properly". We're getting married next month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 156

You deserved it 9 055

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 395

You deserved it 9 640

Today, after ten minutes of squishing my boobs together for my boyfriend, trying to get him to stare, he glanced at them then blankly said "I've seen better tits on my mom, so baby just stop that" and smiled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 340

You deserved it 7 416

Today, I told my boyfriend that I loved his flaming red hair. He told me that he loved the fuzz on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 231

You deserved it 7 542

Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 237

You deserved it 3 031