By Dr_Awesome654 - 31/05/2016 06:55 - United States - Blue Springs
The Top
Dr_Awesome654 tells us more.
Judgment Day
By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Pratt
By NotAsGoodAsATruck - 03/06/2018 14:30 - United States - Ludington
By Shino - 26/06/2018 19:00
Dogs rule
By dumbfounded - 08/05/2016 12:14 - United States - Los Angeles
By Parking princess - 05/09/2018 10:27 - United States - Curwensville
kdragonrose tells us more.
Op here. To clarify, I did NOT give this jerk a ticket for parking in the handicapped spot. He got the ticket for not paying the meter. Handicapped parking meters in my area are painted blue. He cussed me out because he felt having a handicapped license plate entitled him to not have to pay the meter. I told him "why would they have a meter there if you didn't have to pay it. It's even painted blue?" He continued to cuss at me, so I called the police chief who told the man he was wrong. Ps: a first violation parking ticket in my town costs $3. He cussed me out all this time over a $3 parking ticket.
By Scapegoat - 17/11/2018 13:30
By jigglypluff - 19/11/2014 05:27 - United States - Omaha
By Anonymous - 28/12/2018 12:00 - United States
By fifi125 - 24/12/2016 04:01 - Australia
fifi125 tells us more.
Hey guys, just a lil bit of clarification. I was holding onto the tree to get a good look at the blue tongue (which was over half a metre long). We're not normally afraid of her, she's come into our house (which I'll put a picture of in my profile). It's just that that day I was too near her hidey hole so she chased me. I was in the tree havin a little stare-down with her when I must have moved a little too high up because this possum comes out of no where right up into my face. Scared the shit out of me so I ****** legged it inside. I'm also 16 so I don't have a heap of options about where I live lol
By MJ3105 - 07/05/2009 11:36 - Israel
By SGreene - 06/05/2017 20:00
By Anonymous - 11/10/2015 04:20 - Canada - Edmonton
Freud smiled
By Anonymous - 08/10/2015 02:14 - United States - Redmond
By ArtistBlock - 25/11/2016 05:10
By LoveStinks - 18/08/2016 10:56
By Anonymous - 12/10/2017 20:00
Happy 4th of July
By Bacon0426 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Skaneateles
By insert pussy pun, hurr durr - 29/06/2016 17:34 - United States - Hopkinsville
By Anonymous - 08/05/2016 10:38 - United States - Nashville
By beepbeep - 22/08/2018 03:30
By Anonymous - 02/09/2018 14:00 - United Kingdom - Wakefield
Time is a flat circle
By Off to Canada - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Hong Kong - Kowloon
By treegirl - 26/07/2009 05:57 - United States
By strictly cum prancing - 11/12/2015 19:48 - United States
By His name is now "Cunt" in my phone - 05/04/2017 14:00
By Nola - 27/04/2017 12:00
By justfriends - 19/05/2017 16:55
ijustwantedtohangout tells us more.
Oh gosh I never thought this would get posted! I made an account just to comment, though I should have ages ago since I browse all the time. I'm glad you found this as humorous (and creepy) as I did! I've known the guy for about 4 years now, usually through group events, and this was the first time we ever went to hang one-on-one! He was always such a sweetheart and was always super polite and respectful up until this point, and my closer friends from the group vouched for him, so I wasn't too worried about meeting up with him. He's not too terribly old or anything, he's in his late twenties, so when he said he wanted to 'hook up', he definitely meant it in a sexual manner! But given that I just recently turned 18, the age gap and the fact we've known each other since I was 14 made it super creepy for me! I definitely learned my lesson and will be sticking with hanging out in group environments for a little while now.
By Face fucking palm - 23/07/2014 03:36 - United States - Albany
Not feeling it
By thisisstupid_17 - 16/11/2016 14:47
Keywords
Hey, op! In case you were wondering, I didn't get the job. I called after I realized I missed the opportunity and they said no jobs were open. Now for you curious people, the job was as a cashier at McDonalds, (yes they hire) and I don't know how much I would have gotten payed, I was just ecstatic to have a job, plus it would have been before my college student brother ever got one. But I can still beat him to get a drivers license ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)