Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML

Today, I stepped outside my house for the first time in a year, trying to socialize again. I broke my leg. FML

Ouch

Today, the day after saying that I'd never broken a bone, I snapped my fibula in half. FML

Today, I managed to break my ankle by running it over with the wheelchair I've used on a daily basis for the last 6 years. FML

Today, I fractured my shinbone after slipping on a leaf. FML

Today, as I was taking the garbage out, I tripped over my own feet, causing my knee to dislocate in such a way that it shattered the back of my kneecap and fractured my femur. I guess I won't be taking the garbage out again anytime soon. FML

Today, my sister tackled me by the leg in a game of frisbee. I now know the unique sensation of a knee dislocating. It is not a beautiful one. FML

Today, I fractured my tibia, fibula, and tore a tendon in my ankle. How? You might ask. By stepping in a hole at soccer practice. Now I’ll be out for the entire season with months of rehab. FML

A day in the life

Today, I kicked my coffee table while barefoot, got an X-ray, and I’d cracked the bone. Got home, kicked the exact same table with the exact same toe, got another X-ray, the crack is now a full-on break. What a day. FML

Today, I managed to fracture my shoulder blade and dislocate my shoulder, just by falling off a deckchair. FML