Money, Miscellaneous, Weird and Education: Nice dodge

Nice dodge

By UTRejected - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 972

You deserved it 3 979

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Same thing different taste

Beggars can be choosers

By Rebecca Palermo - 14/12/2020 11:03

Today, I saw a girl asking for money on the median of an entrance to a parking lot with her dog. Later, I bought a box of dog treats for her. I drove up and handed it to her. She rolled her eyes and said, "How the hell am I supposed to carry that?" I sat there in stunned disbelief with the box she refused to take. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 235

Keep the change

By hatemylife - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a group of Girl Scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought two bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 421

You deserved it 7 069

By anonymous - 30/06/2010 04:05 - United States

Today, my aunt and I wanted to do something nice. So we made cookies for a local nursing home. After tasting them, nobody ate any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 881

You deserved it 6 031

Helper Blues

By Fat and Embarrassed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Palmdale

Today, I asked an elderly customer at my work if she needed help with her groceries. She responded, "I normally would, but I'm afraid you'll eat all the groceries." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 225

You deserved it 1 505

Doughboy

By phatkroger10 - 10/04/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was selling cookie dough for a fundraiser at an old folks home. One lady ordered a box and told me that she loved cookie dough. I told her it'd be here in four weeks, she said, "Oh I can't wait!" Not really thinking, as I left I said, "I hope you can make it till then!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 112

You deserved it 66 812

Kids say the darndest things

By Chrissy - 14/09/2025 15:00 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting my niece. While we were at the grocery store, she pointed at me and loudly announced, “She says she’s on a diet, but she eats cookies in bed!” She wasn’t wrong. The cashier raised an eyebrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 256

You deserved it 164

By soccerlove09 - 11/10/2010 18:18 - United States

Today, I bought a personalized cookie cake with "Will you go out with me?" for the girl I've liked for five months. When I showed her, she said no, but took the cake with her anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 002

You deserved it 6 386

By bingalingading - 30/03/2015 20:46 - United States - Owosso

Today, I was working at a donation center. I was having a really rough day, so my fiancée dropped me off some cookies. At the end of my shift, the manager told me I couldn't take them home because they were donated and therefore they were "company property." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 534

You deserved it 2 184

By Fatlady43 - 19/01/2010 05:08 - United States

Today, my niece offered me a slice of cake. After I refused, she asked, "Why not? Aren't fat people always hungry?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 298

You deserved it 6 527

Broke boy

By Anonymous - 19/10/2025 00:00

Today, the cashier asked if I wanted to donate $1 to help hungry children. I said, “Not today, thank you.” The man behind me loudly said, “Wow…” Now everyone thinks I hate children. I'm just that broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 394

You deserved it 75

thee_most_dope 30

Friday 21 November 2014 17:45

maybe she meant junk food? or....i really dont know.

201chasew 22

Friday 21 November 2014 17:46

I'm not sure if it was an awkward rejection to your cookies, or that she may be anorexic which is a much more serious problem.

Comments

CaroAurelia 12

Friday 21 November 2014 19:30

If she doesn't eat food, that might be her problem, not yours.

timmeeeee 10

Friday 21 November 2014 19:32

what did you say "you want to eat my cookie?"

dc2fresh 15

Friday 21 November 2014 19:32

how is that an fml if she don't want yo cookies leave her alone

NotDarkKnight 27

Friday 21 November 2014 19:35

Today, someone asked me if I wanted to buy some cookies. My mouth awkwardly responded "I dont eat food." FML

PennyLane27 32

Friday 21 November 2014 19:44

Now I want cookies!

Goblin182 26

Friday 21 November 2014 20:20

New FML rule. No mentioning cookies unless you bring enough for everyone.

CptnWalrusBacon 1

Friday 21 November 2014 19:47

You should've just breathed on her. She doesn't eat food so she's obviously a plant. Give her some carbon dioxide for photosynthesis

cornyrob 33

Friday 21 November 2014 19:52

She could be on a liquid diet or on a hunger strike.

kbug95 12

Friday 21 November 2014 19:56

Maybe she eats people. O.o

josh7279 7

Friday 21 November 2014 20:24

Why is this even a FML?

giraffebear 11

Friday 21 November 2014 20:33

She may be on a liquid only diet due to a medical condition.

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I agree, your life sucks 6 154

You deserved it 1 551

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I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 80

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I agree, your life sucks 57 535

You deserved it 94 594