Today, I let a friend read a draft of the novel I'm writing. She claimed the antagonist is blatantly based on her, and threatened to sue me if I don't pay her royalties. The antagonist is an ancient, insane goblin witch. I guess I see now how this confusion could arise. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was reading my students' Halloween stories I made them write for my creative writing class in high school. One of my students wrote about attacking me. She got my street address perfect and everything. FML
Today, I ruined a 4-year long friendship over something stupid, and I'm now being ghosted. I tried to fix it several times, but she doesn't care anymore I don't think. Imagine being the antagonist in your own story. FML
Today, I found out that my roommate secretly edited a paper I wrote and recently turned in, so that it repeatedly refers to the famed author "Kneel Gayman." I'm positive that's not how it's spelled. FML
Today, I started a new fantasy romance novel. It was very interesting, but then later I read the plot on Wikipedia and spoiled not just the book but the whole series for myself. Why do I do this? FML
Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML
Today, we had a meeting at my job and we had to introduce new ideas to our boss. Earlier, I was talking to one of my close friends who also attended the meeting about my idea. As we start the meeting, she decides to steal my idea and take complete credit for it. My boss loves "her" idea. FML
Today, at college, I finally talked myself into confessing my feelings to a girl I really like. Her response was to threaten to sue me. For what, exactly? I have no goddamned idea. I just don't understand people anymore. FML
Today, my ex friend turned half the school against me, saying I stole and damaged her phone, both lies. Things escalated and she threatened to jump me if I didn't apologize. I apologized but now she's making me pay money for something I didn't do, and I'm seriously considering a restraining order. FML
Today, after getting a friend of a friend a job, overnight she turned into Satan, making a job I once loved a hell on earth. I should really try to get to know people before I do them a favor. FML
Today, I found out that a family member found a publisher for his book; his badly written, terribly sourced, historically inaccurate book that insults and misrepresents most world cultures and religions. If this actually makes it to print, I'll never be able to use my maiden name again. FML
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Top comments
newburton13 26
I doubt she would want to prove in front of a judge that she's an insane goblin witch, even if she is. You'll be fine.
Catkam623 27
Can you collect royalties from an insane asylum?
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Comments (73)
newburton13 26
I doubt she would want to prove in front of a judge that she's an insane goblin witch, even if she is. You'll be fine.
brave_josh 9
Now that would be a horrible waste of court time.
TheCanucklehead 22
I've seen worse. McDonald's getting sued for too hot coffee, a park sued by a lady because she stepped in dog shit and chuck Norris suing law and order for using the trademark names for his left and right legs
leprechaun23 15
Is she basing it on beauty and brains
imaginaryvoice 18
Is the goblin witch a greedy bitch that threatens her victims to give her money? That'd be ironic.
depocadoll 15
Uhh... Not to mention that's not even a term of publish for fiction stories... Unless she has some secrets to share about a magical world she intends to prove real, while convincing you to I lush it as a tell-all... What a nut job.
Caitie_kid 8
She should let her spend her money on the lawsuit just to be able to laugh at her when the judge throws her out of their courtroom on her hiney.
Caitie_kid 8
28, have you ever seen the injuries that resulted from that coffee spill? I would sue too if I had 3rd degree burns due to the coffee being that hot!
ZingZilla 8
42, have you ever seen the horrific injuries caused by chuck Norris' legs? I have.......... that shit ain't pretty man!
mimiminx 23
#42 coffee that is hot?! I've never heard of such a thing!
Caitie_kid 8
50, coffee that is hot enough to leave third degree burns to the bone? You should look up the pictures. It's pretty horrifying.
Caitie_kid 8
In the court hearing they said that in order to cause burns like that the coffee had to be roughly the same temperature as your radiator after a 5 hour drive. That's why she won even though she was at fault for spilling it on herself.
thrAsHeRr9081 16
And even though she won an obsene amount, she only took what covered her hospital bills.
Catkam623 27
Can you collect royalties from an insane asylum?
PterodactylMan 23
I don't think you can, #2
hashshim 23
could OP tell us the name of said book? if love to read it once it comes out.
Jazz_916 9
you may want to find some new friends OP... I mean most people dont like to spend their free time with insane goblin witches.. :P
caohm 18
the judge will laugh her out the court room if it even makes it that far
Joshido 17
Judge Judy
MickiJ 20
An ancient, insane goblin witch? That is a serious case of low self esteem.
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
What a great friend you have there op.
michaelaranda 28
She might be trying to say that you based the goblin's characteristics on her. Even if you did, she's probably not entitled to anything. Your friend is probably just joking. In an actual court of law, her case will only end up losing.
SentrytheDefient 4
you described her personality perfectly !
Melix 31
I doubt she would go up to a judge and explain how she would be similar to a goblin witch, but that's just me.
FeatherTips 10
Just wants the money you'll be collecting when it goes for sale. Something tells me she's either jealous, or worried you'll become successful while she.... does whatever she does. In other words, she be crazy.
fuckedPriceless 17
Proving her point that she is an insane goblin witch. xD