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Today, my brother replaced my cologne with whiskey. I have a job interview and I smell like a drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks (30504) - you totally deserved it (2378)

On 07/17/2009 at 7:14pm - misc - by tukker (man) - Canada (Ontario)

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heresmybellybotton's life also sucks

Anonymous also deserved it

Comments

How can you not smell it yourself? Could have covered it easily, too.

#1 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:20am by PumpkinTarte

Does anyone else suspect that #17 (Suffertree) is about 12 years old? LOL, seriously, whenever I see his comments I think of an annoying little brat who keeps saying "I know you are, but what am I? I know you are, but what am I? I know you are, but what am I?"

#18 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:20am by sacredpoppy

way to reply to the first comment da.

#44 - On 07/18/2009 at 9:52am by gir321

Suffertree is the reason why people tie their kids to trees and leave them there. ._.

#55 - On 07/18/2009 at 12:19pm by CyclonePsycho

Alcohol has a strong smell. Unless you're scent-impaired, YDI.

#2 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:22am by shoshizzle

Do you not smell your cologne before you use it?

#3 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:22am by Fushna

Why would anyone smell a bottle of cologne before using it? It was probably in a spray bottle. I wear perfume all the time and I never stop before spraying it and think "Hmm, better check this first because maybe a sibling replaced it with something else."

Everyone who's saying this guy deserves it is a jackass. Whisky is cologne-colored, and if it was sprayed onto his clothes, he'll have to change into another job-interview-worthy outfit, be late, and probably still smell like a drunk.

#10 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:35am by Jackadi

perfume does have a shelf life. You might want to start smelling it before you spray it on youself. Most guys colonges don't come in refillable bottles.

OP, how little time did you provide yourself to get ready? Just take a 15 minute shower and change into a different set of slacks and a dress shirt + tie. No need to FML, just plan ahead. How could you not smell it before hand?

#14 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:48am by scythefwd

I know I smell my perfume every time before I use it, and it's not because I have a sibling who might do something devious someday.

OP, one, do you really need to take a full length shower to get (what I hope was a small amount) of whiskey off your body? You just change your clothes right after... I'd say even less then fifteen minutes for all of it. And if you don't have the time to do so, you really should've organized your time better. You know why? Because life happens.

#40 - On 07/18/2009 at 7:34am by redbluegreen

Uh. Simple solution. Wash it off.

#4 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:24am by bluepaintred

I agree... wash it off. Worst case scenario you're a little late. Better than smelling like a drunk.

#6 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:27am by realggirl

This.

#24 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:49am by Artorious

Yup. It's a YTDI for not just jumping back in the shower.

#57 - On 07/18/2009 at 12:38pm by Ox_Baker

ydi for having a brother

#5 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:27am by The_Batman

Personally, I don't think that 11 year olds (like #5 and #17) should be allowed on this site. Run along to back to your treehouse, boys!

#20 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:24am by sacredpoppy

you should put nair in his shampoo

#7 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:29am by Terilyn4500

lol yeah, if the sense of smell runs in the family, the brother will never know the difference till he uses it!

#11 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:37am by ihatestupidppl

#68 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:39pm by ihatestupidppl

nice FML reference ;).

#75 - On 07/19/2009 at 3:03am by elektrik

i take it you do a lot of whisky drinking ... lol jk ;)

#8 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:31am by Terilyn4500

You must wear some godawful cologne if you didn't realize before you applied it that it smelled like alcohol...

#9 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:34am by ihatestupidppl

Hey, it worked for the Demoman, right?

#12 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:38am by Westy543

what an ass!!!! FYL. :-(

#13 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:48am by Nacirema20

you are fucking stupid buddy. #1 you would have smelt it upon application.

#2 who the fuck wears cologne to a job application. Maybe deoderant to mask your stench but not cologne unless you are trying to seduce your interviewer. fucking queer.

#15 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:51am by takemetotheriot

plus, what if your interviewer is a severe asthmatic? i actually had a medical school interview where the dean was like this, and they requested that no one wear colognes or body sprays. i saw someone asked to go to the bathroom to attempt to wash it off because they didn't remember the restriction. it's better to play it safe and just, you know, shower.

that said, this is hilarious. mean, but hilarious.

#28 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:16am by RyeBreadBoy

you want to smell good on a job interview retard. where do you work? mcdonalds?

#61 - On 07/18/2009 at 1:32pm by generalsmith2

Maybe stop writing about it and go wash it off, dummy.

#16 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:53am by survivalism

Personally, I don't think that 11 year olds should be allowed on this site.

#19 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:22am by sacredpoppy

How did he get beer in your cologne bottle?

#21 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:26am by kellbelle26

21, are you serious? You can't be serious.
*blank stare*

Whiskey, not beer. Unscrew, empty, refill.

#29 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:28am by yougetmecloserto

actually, with most cologne bottles, there's a metal cap that won't unscrew, so you'd have to break the seal, remove the metal cap, and exchange the 2 liquids.


however, you'd break the metal cap and what not, in order to switch them, thus the poster should have noticed they'd been switched

#71 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:14pm by FXCKMYLIFE

I thought the entire reason that cologne/perfume bottles can't be opened is so that people can not fill empty containers and resell them as the real stuff? Or mix one bottle of real cologne into multiple empty bottles, fill the rest with water, and sell them as originals?

I call fake. Unless it's one of those plastic spritz bottles of body spray. In which case, YDI for wearing cheap stuff to an interview where you're trying to impress someone.

It's really never a good idea to wear a perfume/cologne to a job interview. Your interviewer might have allergies. In which case, the only thing he/she is going to remember about you is that being around you gives them a headache. That's not a good impression to leave on someone.

#22 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:32am by DirtyParkBench

Bed Bath and Beyond sells AMAZING smelling perfume and they come in a screw cap. I'm sure it would impress anyone anyday.

#45 - On 07/18/2009 at 9:59am by gir321

YDI for wearing cologne to an interview, unless it was as a dancer at a gay gentleman's club. you're being considered as a potential employee: to work. not to remind the other employees of a junior high boys locker room.

#23 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:35am by melchior

You should die in a Fire you racist dickwad prick...

#26 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:07am by Niceplace

???

#35 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:49am by timtam24

I wanna push my face in and feel the swoon.

That's my favorite 'Knot song. :D


OP- That sucks. D:
But couldn't you have smelt it first? Or washed it off or something? ._.

#36 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:54am by OneLonelyDay

I thought you said "colon" at first. I was about to say, "FYL indeed!"

#30 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:29am by heatherh0rror

LMFAO. That. Was. Awesome.

#32 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:30am by DirtyParkBench

You want to fuck another guy in the throat??

#31 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:30am by yougetmecloserto

YDI for thinking cologne would help you in a job interview.

#33 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:45am by fnool

YDI for wearing cologne to a job interview in the first place. What is it, bartender at a gay club?

#34 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:45am by FlaminYawn

Let me guess, you still live in your parents basement in your sports car bed you got when you were 6 years old? Working as the Janitor for McDonalds isn't going to get you anywhere, you dipshit.

#37 - On 07/18/2009 at 6:04am by kpanchal

YDI for not killing your brother

#38 - On 07/18/2009 at 7:18am by ANTONKR

if you have the time to post it on FML, there should be enough time to maybe take a shower...

#39 - On 07/18/2009 at 7:33am by bittersweets

Ok change your clothes

#41 - On 07/18/2009 at 9:04am by tipsy337

Okay, first of all. People don't smell their cologne before using it, because why would they? I certainly don't. Second, if you spray it on correctly, you'll notice the smell. But then it'll be too late. God, you people are stupid.

#42 - On 07/18/2009 at 9:26am by softbonez

Are you kidding? Hello. The first impression always counts.

#43 - On 07/18/2009 at 9:28am by softbonez

How did you not notice that?! bahahahahahaha, I'm sorry :\
I'm not saying you should've sniffed it, but you certainly can smell it right before you put it on

#46 - On 07/18/2009 at 10:33am by such_is_life

There's this magic stuff called water. Sometimes you can find it in secret locations call washrooms. I've been told, though I've never seen it done, that if you put some of the magic water over your skin, debris and other substances adhering to it will be partially or entirely taken away. The addition of another substance, often called soap, can enhance this cleansing effect greatly. Futurists suggest that one day the use of these materials will be commonplace.

#47 - On 07/18/2009 at 10:44am by p00p0ster0us

That's not magic sir, That's soap and water. That, and the ritual of topical cleansing, have been prevalent in society for a while.

#49 - On 07/18/2009 at 10:50am by RhymePrime

I'm sure he/she was using something called SSAAARRCAASSMMM! OOOHHH!

#51 - On 07/18/2009 at 11:01am by postermelt

yea double sarcasm einstein. he was being sarcastic too

#62 - On 07/18/2009 at 1:35pm by generalsmith2

I know it was sarcasm.

#73 - On 07/18/2009 at 7:13pm by RhymePrime

Take a shower.

#48 - On 07/18/2009 at 10:48am by TrAnMu

YDI, simply because it is a cardinal rule to never wear perfume/cologne to a job interview. Frankly, you probably wouldn't have gotten the job had you worn the cologne, so it's a wash either way.

#50 - On 07/18/2009 at 10:57am by aupilot

1) I agree. Cologne at an interview is a turn-off. Or if you were to wear some, put it on HOURS before the interview, so that it's faint and become a part of your natural scent. 2) If you have time to post this to FML, then you have enough time to wash your neck. 3) Rub your skin with Purell® or something similar, the rapid-drying alcohol should evaporate the scent.

#52 - On 07/18/2009 at 11:10am by jonnymohio

2) The limitations of FML posting ("Today,...") mean that there may need to be some lying in order to ever post a story here. I doubt he used the few minutes he had to post this FML.

#56 - On 07/18/2009 at 12:30pm by Defiant47

hahahahha that's funny, but ah man that's sucksss

#53 - On 07/18/2009 at 11:59am by cheertigers

umm...so change ur clothes dumb butt

#54 - On 07/18/2009 at 12:17pm by cramazing

Why would you wear cologne to a job interview? And you could have just washed off the whiskey when you smelled it.

This is not an FML. You just want some attention.

#58 - On 07/18/2009 at 12:39pm by thugbert

Erm, shower rather than FMLing about it? This is getting dangerously close to a YDI.

#59 - On 07/18/2009 at 12:46pm by cheesefest

Cologne smells just as awful anyway. That was a lose-lose situation.

#60 - On 07/18/2009 at 1:15pm by patrickhb

haha, how did he do that? you cant get the top off of the cologne or perfume bottles. im suspicious of a fake.

#63 - On 07/18/2009 at 1:44pm by Paige_Nicole10

most work places are scent free zones now, so the cologne is over doing it anyways.

also, change and shower, and if you don't have time, wash your face and change your shirt. if you don't have time for that, you need to learn not to leave things until the last minute so you have time to fix things when they go wrong.

#64 - On 07/18/2009 at 2:39pm by laffinatu

Idk about the rest of you guys, but I find this prank hilarious. It does suck pretty bad for the OP, but his brother is mighty clever, lmao.

#65 - On 07/18/2009 at 2:55pm by dang

haha thats a good prank. Sucks for you though

#66 - On 07/18/2009 at 2:56pm by RunZoneFive

first one to make me laugh in a while. :-) YLS, but in a funny way.

#67 - On 07/18/2009 at 3:29pm by wheedlebug1164

If you had time to Get on the Net, Come Here, and Post it, you had time to take a quick shower.
If your clothes were also scented, you toss them in the dryer with some laundry soap. Helluva uncomfortable, but it usually does the trick.

And then you dump your cologne on your brothers head at a highly inappropriate time.

#69 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:49pm by Arrowatch

hahah thats hilarious

#70 - On 07/18/2009 at 4:49pm by TALKSHIT

hahahahaha people keep saying to go wash it off and stuff!! it was probably from earlier before he got on this site. did it occur to anyone that he needed to leave right then and there? so he wouldn't have time to wash it off. WOW everyone is a genius. also, just because it starts with Today, doesn't mean it happened today. they have to start and end correctly to be published.

#72 - On 07/18/2009 at 5:35pm by ohhhh_Ashley

hey, genius, they're referring to the fact that he uses the present tense throughout; rather than saying "i went to my interview" he says "i have to go to my interview smelling like a drunk", which, in fact, he doesnt.

#77 - On 07/19/2009 at 11:07pm by melilikiki

YOUR NOT SUPOSED TO WEAR COLOGNE OR PERFUME TO AN INTERVIEW ANYWAY!!!! but sorry, that sucks!

#74 - On 07/18/2009 at 9:30pm by supercalifragi

lol...well even though your life sucks....by the wording of this fml is sounds as if you have yet to go to your interview...so good choice to get on the internet and write an fml about smelling like a drunk....instead of oh i dont' know....trying to wash it off....haha.

#76 - On 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm by ditzykayla

Hey, I think I interviewed you!

#78 - On 07/22/2009 at 1:39pm by DrSamBeckett

i would hire you

#79 - On 12/31/2009 at 11:08pm by brickhouse95

awesome prank

#80 - On 02/03/2010 at 1:39pm by vtsocks

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