Today, I lost my cell phone. Since I sleep on the couch, I started looking through the cushions. I didn't find my phone, but after 6 months of uncomfortably sleeping on the couch, I find out I'm sleeping on top of a pull out bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10904) - you totally deserved it (37187)
On 07/07/2009 at 10:34am - misc - by stupid (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Your comment has nothing to to with the top comment. Oh wait, it's just you again. No one will fall for your phishing site, fuck off.
why are you sleeping on the couch anyway? i assume you've been slumming it round a friends or something. in which case, they should have told you! Uncomfortable sleep can be torture though
#2 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:17pm by IndigoKitty
A studio apartment or couch surfing would explain the couch sleeping.
#3 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:18pm by intrepid00
usually those pull-out beds are more uncomfortable than sleeping on the actual sofa anyways...
#4 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:18pm by hawaii_love
Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.
I can guess your IQ.
#5 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:19pm by sikanderimran
And I could definitely tell what your gender is from your immature name and how you think all women are stupid, whereas men are "much more" intelligent.
Don't be a dick.
#111 - On 07/08/2009 at 4:48pm by FerociousFishy
so? it's not like it's a problem if you sleep comfy on the couch
#7 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:20pm by mijzelffan
at least when you sleep on the pull-out part it will feel so much better than if you had discovered it earlier.
think about it, after sleeping for six months uncomfortably you'll appreciate sleeping comfortably more.
#9 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:21pm by jjjjessica
What a dumbass, so I guess you don't clean your couch?
#10 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:23pm by YoungTechnique
i cant add anything these guys havent said...
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pull out beds hurt like hell maybe even more than the couch when you don't use the pull out bed
#13 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:27pm by coldplaylive2003
I thought that was a really funny one actually. It's ironic. The bad FMLs are the emo ones with no humor just whining.
#41 - On 07/07/2009 at 3:43pm by randomusername
WTF ! the cell phone part doesnt fucking matter. Just fucking say that after 6 months of sleeping on an uncomfortable couch, you realized that it was a pull out bed ! Retard.
#17 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:32pm by FerociousFishy
You don't quite realise what a retard is eh? ahaaa idiot.
'n it's a well written FML.
+ to others, it probably ISN'T the OP's couch, otherwise yeah, they would've known.
yaa..coming from the retard who can`t type proper grammar. Don`t call people idiots until you learn English !
#27 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:53pm by FerociousFishy
Ya know what, this was pretty funny!!! Why do all of you people insist on analyzing these things to every detail, who really gives a shit why this person is sleeping on a couch?
#18 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:32pm by skullbuster
The op meantioned the cell because that explains why he/she finally dug in the couch.
#20 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:38pm by Laci_Laine
is it your couch? shouldn't you know something like that? dude..
#21 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:40pm by stephsteph90
I'm pretty sure MOST people don't, including you. Douche is a verb, not a noun...so I'm confused as to why you said "a douche." It'd be different if you said doucheBAG.
#74 - On 07/07/2009 at 8:11pm by QueenOfMelodrama
QueenofMelodrama, I believe that you are, in fact, A douche.
(I'm using "douche" as slang here, so my usage is not included below. See wikipedia for more information if you don't understand.)
from M-W:
Main Entry: douche
Pronunciation: \ˈdüsh\
Function: noun
1 a: a jet or current of liquid (as a cleansing solution) directed against or into a bodily part or cavity (as the vagina) b: an act of cleansing with a douche
2: a device for giving douches
3 (British) : an abrupt often chastening shock to the nerves, emotions, or awareness
#82 - On 07/07/2009 at 9:26pm by poopsicle22
Touché. It is also a noun. However, it is a verb as well, and I generally don't think of it in the terms of being a noun because it is rarely used in that context outside of slang usage, at least where I'm from.
And if I am a douche, in slang terms, I'm still far less of one than you are for resorting to petty namecalling.
#84 - On 07/07/2009 at 9:44pm by QueenOfMelodrama
Also, that "liquid" is often water. Using the word as a noun is kind of redundant.
#85 - On 07/07/2009 at 9:51pm by QueenOfMelodrama
"Douchebag," or simply "douche," is considered to be a pejorative term in North America. The term implies a variety of negative qualities, specifically arrogance and engaging in obnoxious and/or irritating actions without malicious intent.
I think it fits you quite well, and you obviously either didn't read or didn't comprehend the entirety of my post.
You may now keep digging if you wish.
#88 - On 07/07/2009 at 10:29pm by poopsicle22
You guys have WAY too much time on your hands. Are you seriously analyzing the origins, meaning and proper usage of the word douche? LOL. It's a DISS. That's alllll you need to know. Now sit back and enjoy the FML's and stop ruining it for everyone with your over analytical remarks! Please!
#101 - On 07/08/2009 at 2:35am by mylifeisfucked3
QofM was being a douche, and I just wanted to let everyone know.
#102 - On 07/08/2009 at 3:10am by poopsicle22
What did I not understand about your post?
First, you called me a name for no reason whatsoever. Normally, I'd just ignore anything you say and write it off as rubbish from that point on, but I was intrigued to see where you were going with it. Then, you listed off a very limited definition of the word, which showed that yes, it CAN also be used as a noun. That doesn't change the fact that the word is most-often used as a verb UNLESS you are regarding the slang term, which was likely just shortened from "douche bag" in the first place. There are very few practical uses to use the word douche as a noun if not using slang.
And remember, I'm not the one resorting to childish games.
Unless you want me to, in which case I'll simply state "I know you are but what am I?" and "I'm rubber, you're glue. Whatever you say bounces off of me and sticks back onto you." Saying that is as idiotic as you're acting by saying I'm a douche for no reason whatsoever.
Grow up.
Also remember, YOU'RE the one that started this by berating somebody for their usage of a SLANG WORD. Which I believe would make you the bigger douche. If you perceive my words as my being a douche, you deserve every word. I'm being no more obnoxious that you are. You're just getting a taste of your own medicine and clearly don't like it. But will that stop you from being rude to others? I doubt it, so I don't know why I even bother. I guess it's because I'm apparently a douche. (Which is a PATHETIC insult, if I may say so myself. So if that's all I am, yippee.)
#108 - On 07/08/2009 at 12:48pm by QueenOfMelodrama
@mylifeisfucked3 - Haha, sorry. I'm a linguistics nerd and I am by nature a very analytical person. We took a personality quiz in a class once, and the teacher started laughing when I got analytical, because it was that obvious.
Also, how does it "ruin" it for others? Just skim over it or laugh at it. Or don't even read the comments.
As a matter of fact, I'm not even sure why I read the comments myself. I'd estimate about half the comments are trolls looking for bait, and I enjoy debating too much to pass it up all the time. Then the troll tries to turn it into an argument by being insulting and name-calling, and I remember why I don't go on forums so much anymore.
...Oh well!
#109 - On 07/08/2009 at 12:57pm by QueenOfMelodrama
Strange, my couch is more comfortable than my bed. :(
Do you want my couch?
#25 - On 07/07/2009 at 2:49pm by SuperSpore
Caught again. DO NOT GO TO THIS WEBSITE. It's just one of those offer-completion scams. DOUCHEBAG!
#37 - On 07/07/2009 at 3:30pm by skullbuster
Who doesn't know know their couch is a pull-out?? If you're staying on someone's couch....they must really want you there if they didn't tell you it was a pull-out!
#30 - On 07/07/2009 at 3:19pm by Hellsno
How is this a YDI? How was she supposed to know. This sucks, hope you start having better sleep.
#34 - On 07/07/2009 at 3:26pm by jeremymg91
My retarded? I don't believe I have one of those. Maybe it's yours.
#79 - On 07/07/2009 at 9:14pm by poopsicle22
Our mom sleeps on the couch... she finds it uncomfortable sleeping anywhere else
#36 - On 07/07/2009 at 3:29pm by SeventhFonons
lol #47
OP- Well look at it this way, now you have a bed to sleep on tonight that you didn't have last night. =/
Lol, I've done that before, too. Well not for 6 months but still. I'm sorry, haha.
#51 - On 07/07/2009 at 4:20pm by jewelzgalore
Fitting. "by - stupid (woman)", is there any other kind of woman?
#52 - On 07/07/2009 at 4:29pm by tehhotness
Not sure what to do about the bed, but if you're still looking for your phone, just dial your number on another one.
#54 - On 07/07/2009 at 4:29pm by theflamezbegin
Lol wow.. if I were ever going to be on a couch for 6 freakin months, and it were that uncomfortable, I'd take it apart to find out wth the problem is. And not literally teaar it apart.. just take it apart ya know
#55 - On 07/07/2009 at 4:37pm by DeltaBalls
couches aren't really made for sleeping on, she probably just thought it was a normal couch. that wouldn't really warrant disassembly.
#81 - On 07/07/2009 at 9:18pm by poopsicle22
Fail. This isn't even funny, you're just a dumb ass -_-
#60 - On 07/07/2009 at 4:49pm by Avenging_Angel
I highly doubt that during those 6 months, you never found that out?
I mean, Are you Stupid? YDI.
#67 - On 07/07/2009 at 5:59pm by OrgasmicTactic
wow that's embarrassing
go to http://www.sexyemilie.com/?id=1757244
#69 - On 07/07/2009 at 6:49pm by smoeguy159
I think this is bullshit. I mean who buys a couch and doesnt even know its a pullout...?
#70 - On 07/07/2009 at 6:59pm by Caayouteepie
Umm, you are dumb. Who buys a couch just to sleep on it? Obviously, it's likely that it is not her couch if she is sleeping on it. She is probably staying with friends.
#75 - On 07/07/2009 at 8:16pm by dramakat11
whats with all the ******* scamers?
oh by the way go to www.fml.com/reportscammers to get the clips and the other guy outta here
#71 - On 07/07/2009 at 7:03pm by martymcfly12
nice job.
Anyway, pull out beds are awesome if you enjoy sleeping on protruding metal coils and back numbness.
why would you sleep on a couch for 6 months? at least get an air mattress or a futon or something
#80 - On 07/07/2009 at 9:16pm by poopsicle22
Well honey, that is sort of funny. But seriously, you don't have to sleep on a sofa, or a sofabed. Just post some pics and maybe I will offer you a real bed.
YDI for sleepin on a couch YDI for being alive YDI for being a mental retard and YDI fir posting a fake FML this could be real but you have already posted like 4 FML's and even though you are mentally fucked Yourlife can't be that fucked
#92 - On 07/07/2009 at 11:10pm by pleasedonttellme
I'm sorry, but you're stupid. If someone doesn't sign in, they're asked to make a nickname for posting. That's why there are so many Anonymous' (correct pluralization? I don't know.)
So it's not that she has posted so many FMLs, it's that 'Stupid' happens to be a popular nickname.
You really shouldn't act so smug and stuck-up when you don't know what you're talking about...
OP: Sorry to hear that.. but at least now you have a bed! But to be honest, pull-outs are probably worse than just sleeping on the couch... :)
Nope - an apostrophe NEVER makes something plural. The same goes for the person above. It's sad that very few people know how to use apostrophes.
#98 - On 07/08/2009 at 12:37am by tehredbaran
This is a good one. We need more funny fml's like this one and less, "ohhhh, boo hoo, I'm fat", and "ohhhh, boo hoo, I haven't been laid in years".
Maybe, just maybe, the OP is a minor and still living with his parents, not by choice, but by law...
I'm doing the same, I sleep on the couch, it's not fold-out though, be glad you're blessed with any type of bed.
#103 - On 07/08/2009 at 5:07am by StealthStorm67
Your parents must really hate you if they've never even gotten you a bed.
#104 - On 07/08/2009 at 5:59am by poopsicle22
Six months and you haven't pulled the cushions off the couch to clean it? What kind of swine pen do you live in?
#116 - On 07/11/2009 at 1:17pm by LadyAlathia
i find that wen ur lookinq 4 one thinq, u often find somethinq else...
#121 - On 03/20/2010 at 3:57pm by dabomblyktiktikk
