edris_305

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Offline (the 08/02/2016 at 12:38am)

edris_305

6Fucked!

edris_305
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2584
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About edris_305 : Meh ~_~

edris_305's page activity

Visits<b>julako</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 2:23am<b>royr7395</b> - the 07/19/2016 at 6:14pm<b>ashleymae2013</b> - the 07/08/2016 at 2:00pm<b>lujainkh</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 11:43am<b>EddySaBoy</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 5:10am<b>ireallylikecats</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 11:35am<b>robsmit98</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 8:43am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 8:26am<b>niallo</b> - the 06/16/2016 at 9:22am<b>jforren</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 6:56pm<b>chuka81</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 9:27am<b>jtorgey84</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 8:26am<b>brownapple</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 4:36am<b>n3rdzgotskillz</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 4:11am<b>Quendolin</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 3:25pm<b>charrbee90</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 4:48pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 3:25pm<b>aleeee1891</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 3:46pm

Fucked!<b>royr7395</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 12:14am<b>ireallylikecats</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 5:35pm<b>n3rdzgotskillz</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 10:11am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 2:26pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 11:54am<b>splitms</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 2:57am

edris_305's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of edris_305's badges

edris_305's favorite FMLs

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

by cjw / 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm / United States / Kids

Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML

by peace out / 03/05/2013 at 3:19pm / United States (South Carolina) / Kids

Today, wanting to impress my date, I bullshitted her about how I was an environmental scientist. She got so impressed that she invited me over to her place. Not her home, her office. So that I could give her pointers on her current project. She's a real environmental scientist. FML

by is there a environmental scientist in the house? / 03/05/2013 at 3:48am / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML

by goodgrief / 03/05/2013 at 12:08am / United States (New Mexico) / Transportation

Today, I woke up to find that my parents had replaced my regular alarm clock with a walking one that requires you to get up and find it. The alarm was set to 5:00AM, which would have been fine if it wasn't the weekend. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2013 at 3:02am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm / Iceland / Work

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 1:29am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

by ayye_its_nikki / 12/19/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2012 at 8:59am / United States / Kids

Today, I was late for class. I have extreme social anxiety, so I quietly slipped into the huge, packed auditiorium, trying to be as quiet as possible. When I was almost to my seat, I accidentally kicked a teacher's coffee down the steps. The entire class looked at me and clapped. FML

by conspicuous / 09/12/2012 at 4:11pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2012 at 10:00pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous

Today, my pregnant wife broke down in tears over the fact that since moving to Brazil for my job, we don't have regular access to macaroni and cheese. FML

by stupidbullcrêpe / 08/20/2012 at 6:06pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Health

Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML

by Dumbfounded / 08/08/2012 at 7:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I used a prank app, where you shake the cell, and it makes the screen looks cracked. I ended up losing my grip on the phone. It went flying, and it is now cracked for real. FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2012 at 2:24am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, on the brink of a stiflingly hot summer, I've come to a terrible realisation. It seems the apartment I've just moved into has been specially insulated to trap enough heat inside for the occupants to survive the planet's next Ice Age. FML

by Broon / 05/25/2012 at 3:55pm / United Kingdom (Leeds) / Transportation