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edris_305

Offline (the 10/23/2014 at 7:54pm) | Search for a member

edris_305

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1012
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About edris_305 : Three things i love
1)my ps3
2)my phone
3)my PC
Im not coming out great am I !!!
Forever alone :(

edris_305's page activity

Visits<b>llbaum</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:38am<b>abylenee_</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 9:49pm<b>samm12099</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 3:15am<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 4:59pm<b>fmlkilla</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 6:07pm<b>Jacob_G</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:31pm<b>dante_53</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 7:11pm<b>purple_glitter</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 1:46pm<b>XxNINJA_28xX</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 11:28am<b>herpaderpaherp</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 11:40pm<b>Second_to_All</b> - the 09/12/2013 at 1:45am<b>psiloveyou15</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 9:50pm<b>blueeyedann</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 12:36pm<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 12:01am<b>jaffvis</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 7:44pm<b>Elwin93</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 4:52pm<b>queefedMyPants</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 3:19pm<b>babyismail</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 2:25pm

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edris_305's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12975) - you deserved it (32038)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, after my coworker bought coffee for me for the fifth time, I thanked him and asked him why. Apparently it's the only way to get me to shut up in the morning so he can get work done. FML

#20534501
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10904) - you deserved it (33038)

On 03/07/2013 at 8:44am - work - by coffee - United States

Today, I was fired from my job for breaking my company's tattoo policy. I have a small scar on my wrist that roughly resembles a heart. My boss insists that it's one of those white ink tattoos. No one will believe me. FML

#20534364
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37458) - you deserved it (2214)

On 03/07/2013 at 3:17am - work - by crap - United States

Today, instead of actually teaching us something, our college professor excitedly showed us the godawful Harlem Shake video he made with his friends. FML

#20533295
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30532) - you deserved it (4431)

On 03/06/2013 at 6:51am - work - by Will this stupid fad ever end? (man) - United States

Today, my psychopathic ex-girlfriend spray-painted "Free Candy" on the side of my van, knowing damn well I have to park it in front of an elementary school on a daily basis to pick up my daughter. FML

#20532616
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40940) - you deserved it (3855)

On 03/05/2013 at 7:07pm - kids - by cjw - United States

Today, I had to help my little sister do a first-grade project for school. For one part, they have to draw a picture of their role model. She drew a whale, and I asked, "A whale is your role model?" She laughed and said, "No! It's you!" FML

#20532338
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35822) - you deserved it (5422)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:19pm - kids - by peace out - United States (South Carolina)

Today, wanting to impress my date, I bullshitted her about how I was an environmental scientist. She got so impressed that she invited me over to her place. Not her home, her office. So that I could give her pointers on her current project. She's a real environmental scientist. FML

#20531914
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8835) - you deserved it (67912)

On 03/05/2013 at 3:48am - work - by is there a environmental scientist in the house? - United States (California)

Today, I parked next to a police officer's car in a bad part of town. When I got out, I saw a bag of pot on the ground between the cop's car and mine. When I pointed it out to him, he insisted it was mine and interrogated me to the point of tears. FML

#20531724
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35918) - you deserved it (4362)

On 03/05/2013 at 12:08am - misc - by goodgrief (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I woke up to find that my parents had replaced my regular alarm clock with a walking one that requires you to get up and find it. The alarm was set to 5:00AM, which would have been fine if it wasn't the weekend. FML

#20530545
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32000) - you deserved it (3446)

On 03/04/2013 at 3:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at an open mic comedy club, my jokes went down so poorly that someone decided to hurl a chair at me on-stage. FML

#20466782
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26489) - you deserved it (14117)

On 01/18/2013 at 7:26pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Iceland

Today, at a restaurant, I happily watched as my boyfriend of three years got down on his knees and proposed to me. Before I could say yes and hug him, a girl flung herself at him, kissed him and shouted, "Yes!" With us still highly confused, she then ran away. FML

#20431269
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44352) - you deserved it (3447)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:29am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

#20406748
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33102) - you deserved it (19042)

On 12/19/2012 at 12:07am - misc - by ayye_its_nikki - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing with my four year old cousin. He had a toy whale and said, "Shark!" I corrected him and told him it was a whale. He picked it up, threw it at my face, and yelled, "SHAAARK!" FML

#20176364
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18382) - you deserved it (6867)

On 11/24/2012 at 8:59am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was late for class. I have extreme social anxiety, so I quietly slipped into the huge, packed auditiorium, trying to be as quiet as possible. When I was almost to my seat, I accidentally kicked a teacher's coffee down the steps. The entire class looked at me and clapped. FML

#20069005
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21361) - you deserved it (3222)

On 09/12/2012 at 4:11pm - misc - by conspicuous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I woke up to an angry text from my roommate asking me to please let her know next time I'm going to have a friend crashing on the couch. I have no idea who she's talking about. FML

#20038307
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21432) - you deserved it (1379)

On 08/23/2012 at 10:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Saskatchewan)



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