edris_305

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Offline (the 11/25/2016 at 8:05am)

edris_305

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edris_305
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3105
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About edris_305 : Meh ~_~

edris_305's page activity

Visits<b>kitteh86</b> - the 10/26/2016 at 10:56pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 10/05/2016 at 2:15pm<b>Chris_1414</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 4:15pm<b>nettles12</b> - the 10/04/2016 at 1:20am<b>WCARlover</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 9:37pm<b>BryantStone</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 8:49pm<b>smeegle</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 7:00pm<b>vikky538</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 12:33pm<b>csjc</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 9:12am<b>kiki1705</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 5:03am<b>TheCitizens96</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 12:26am<b>not_really_here</b> - the 10/02/2016 at 11:17pm<b>2simz</b> - the 10/02/2016 at 11:11pm<b>royr7395</b> - the 09/29/2016 at 1:22am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 5:58pm<b>Dancersrule1</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 12:44pm<b>ThrottleJockey</b> - the 09/28/2016 at 11:29am<b>kay_rystal</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 6:39pm

Fucked!<b>2simz</b> - the 10/03/2016 at 5:11am<b>royr7395</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 12:14am<b>ireallylikecats</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 5:35pm<b>n3rdzgotskillz</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 10:11am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 06/05/2016 at 2:26pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 11:54am<b>splitms</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 2:57am

edris_305's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of edris_305's badges

edris_305's favorite FMLs

Today, we had a get together for work at a restaurant I've never heard of. After spending all week trying to make a good impression on my new boss and co-workers, I showed up in a pair of shorts and a Star Wars T-Shirt. Turns out it was one of the fanciest restaurants in town. FML

by Lizzie / 05/30/2013 at 6:32pm / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I found shit on my windshield. I'm not sure if it is human or animal, but it was conveniently smeared all over and even more was placed under my wipers just in case I used them to clean it up. This isn't the first time, and I have no idea who I could have pissed off. FML

by windshitwipers / 05/30/2013 at 5:41am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the Doctor's for a mole my husband had said was, "growing and changing color". It turned out to be a wood tick. My husband knew, but said it was too "icky" to take off himself. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 12:32am / United States (Wisconsin) / Health

Today, the communications expert I'm forced to work with added the line "as they can catch bigger fishes" to a film script. She does not believe me when I tell her that the plural of fish is "fish." This idiot not only has the final word, she makes twice what I do. FML

by onefishtwofishes / 05/23/2013 at 4:15pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2013 at 9:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, at work, my boss made me go outside and wash people's cars for free. I work at Verizon. FML

by Anonymous / 05/21/2013 at 2:31am / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

by well okay then / 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went for a walk. When it started pouring, I ran under the nearest tree for protection. It didn't occur to me that it might look suspicious hiding under a stranger's tree in a black hoodie, until the cops showed up. FML

by black hoodie / 05/19/2013 at 7:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, the weather was beautiful, so I decided to go out skating. I guess I took a wrong turn into a bad neighborhood, because I ended up being chased several blocks by a group of jacked-up thugs wielding baseball bats and taunting, "Skate or die, homie!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 4:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I spent hours debating with a lady who claimed she'd spent years "studying the big bang theory". Not only did she not know the scientific meaning of the word "theory", her killer argument was "If the big bang happened, where are the fossils?" I'm not sure whether or not I just got trolled. FML

by look at the fucking universe, lady / 05/18/2013 at 2:44pm / United States (Alabama) / Geek

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 5:17am / Love

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

by KingUrge / 04/26/2013 at 4:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mum asked me, "Shouldn't you be cleaning your room?" On impulse, I replied, "Shouldn't you be in the kitchen?" I've never been hit so hard in my life. FML

by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous