Love: Today, my mother and I were watching a movie. She got up to go...

By shrek - 29/08/2016 10:26 - United States - Chattanooga

Today, my mother and I were watching a movie. She got up to go to bed, and I blurted out, "Please don't leave me." Her response: "You really need a boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 409

You deserved it 2 071

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By Jake - 28/09/2010 17:35 - United States

Today, I took a girl I like to the movies. Everything went great until I went in to kiss her. She didn't object, but my mother, who apparently followed me to the theater and was now pulling me away by my shirt while saying, "We're leaving!" certainly did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 928

You deserved it 3 462

Sucks to suck

By youfuckingdumbassmum - 27/12/2012 23:20 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 703

You deserved it 4 889

By FatalxDesire599 - 05/03/2010 15:39 - United States

Today, my mother stormed into my room shouting about how I never go anywhere and then tells me to go out "NOW" and do something. As she is pushing me out the door, her boyfriend walks in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 675

You deserved it 2 816

Moral support

By too bad so sad - 15/02/2009 11:51 - United States

Today, as I sat on my couch heartbroken from a very recent breakup, my mother walked up to me and in a very comforting voice said, "Maybe he left you for someone else." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 601

You deserved it 2 470

By motherlover - 05/08/2014 04:40 - United States - Hoffman Estates

Today, my boyfriend laid his head on my bare chest and said, "You're like my mother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 277

You deserved it 4 359

By ohfantastic - 25/01/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 675

You deserved it 2 370

By Anonymous - 21/06/2009 08:50 - Australia

Today, I was talking with my mother and expressed my slight disappointment at how many of my friends are getting into relationships, whereas I'm still single. My mother decided to encourage me by saying "Don't worry, sweetie. There are boys out there who don't go for looks. You'll be fine". FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 181

You deserved it 4 017

By chee - 11/02/2009 23:57 - United States

Today, I told my mom, "I love you". She responded with, "What? I never told you I loved you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 794

You deserved it 2 934

By anony - 24/05/2016 12:57 - New Zealand - East Tamaki

Today, my boyfriend's mum begged me to stay with my boyfriend because she says I'm the only one who can actually get him through college and into a decent job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 708

You deserved it 1 038

Inappropriate!

By Anonymous - 29/09/2010 02:09 - United States

Today, I nervously introduced my mother to my new boyfriend. I had to sit and watch her flirt with him for an hour. When I took her in the other room and confronted her about it, she said, "Don't you dare ruin this for me!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 116

You deserved it 3 405

Lilo4life 26

Tuesday 30 August 2016 8:52

Perfectly acceptable exclamation if it was a horror film.

Lady_Spaghetti 36

Tuesday 30 August 2016 9:08

Wow--you feel bad for someone that (should) care about their partner? Do you not have a girlfriend/boyfriend? If you do, I feel bad for them.

Comments

Lilo4life 26

Tuesday 30 August 2016 8:52

Perfectly acceptable exclamation if it was a horror film.

J352SAURUS 30

Tuesday 30 August 2016 9:05

Were you watching Shrek?

Lady_Spaghetti 36

Tuesday 30 August 2016 9:08

Wow--you feel bad for someone that (should) care about their partner? Do you not have a girlfriend/boyfriend? If you do, I feel bad for them.

paris_ava 24

Tuesday 30 August 2016 9:25

I mean, if u love someone it's perfectly normal to want to spend time with them, so assuming OP loves their mother, this shouldn't be an issue

Kchchan288 5

Tuesday 30 August 2016 9:29

Time to start using tinder... :)

Lalala579121 27

Tuesday 30 August 2016 9:51

Your single life is all ogre now.

Sir_Cow 17

Tuesday 30 August 2016 10:25

Guess you need your prince Charming.

thefmlman2011 36

Tuesday 30 August 2016 10:41

I can fix that

SpyroMello 29

Tuesday 30 August 2016 11:47

Not as bad I feel for the people who still say dicks out for harambe

Emma1562 35

Tuesday 30 August 2016 13:10

That was stupid from the start, nobody even knew what harambe was or the name until he died. I thought it was just stupid.

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The Top

Today, I discovered my boyfriend's spider-infested shed where I refused to set foot, where he is constantly fixing the mower, bikes, or his car, is actually just a sound recording of power tools he plays so I won’t go down and disturb him. He has a TV, an Xbox, and a fridge in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 318

You deserved it 545

Today, I found out my dentist is retiring. This wouldn't be that big of a deal except that if we want to transfer our dental records to a new dentist we have to do it before he retires and there's a $30 processing fee per person. Three of us use that dentist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 78

The Top

Today, I had to calm down an angry customer who claimed one of my employees had "traumatized" her dog. Apparently her dog is really OCD and my employee didn't line up the dog bed at the right angle. She threatened to report us to the BBB. How do these morons even exist? FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 260

You deserved it 1 359

Today, out of the goodness of my heart, I went to work to help out a co-worker even though my last day was last week. I parked in a garage a block away for 2 hours. I paid $20 to park, didn't get paid, am spending $400 to get my back window replaced, and I have to buy a new iPod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 861

You deserved it 8 470

Today, in a waiting room, my 4-year-old daughter told me she saw two guys kissing. I quietly explained that some men like men, they're gay, and normal like everyone else. I was pleased with myself until the woman across from me scoffed and muttered, "Disgusting." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 479

You deserved it 8 366

Today, a coworker sent a last-minute request for a highly complex custom report based on a spreadsheet. It took most of the weekend and Monday to get right because he'd screwed up most of the calculations. The client was pissed; they'd wanted it done by 5PM GMT that Friday. He'd sat on the request until 5 EST Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 81

Today, my boss decided that, because I got dragged into a vacation that I didn't even want to go on, she was going to take a promotion back before she even gave it to me. I don't know what's worse, losing the promotion or going on that crappy vacation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 361

You deserved it 1 824

Today, I realised I may have a drinking problem when the recycling bin was due to go out and I physically couldn’t move the bin. I thought my kids might have put a rock in there but no, it was weighed down by the sheer weight of two weeks worth of wine bottles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 748

Same thing different taste

Sucks to suck

Moral support

Inappropriate!

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