Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9474) - you totally deserved it (3154)
On 03/01/2010 at 2:30am - intimacy - by Lovejunkie (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)
(+1)I don't care what anyone says, when it comes down to situations like this; size does really matter folks!
#1 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:05am by moonshine_bek
(0)is that stereo type true lol i cuz i think asians are hawwttt
#13 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:18am by melodey123
(0)vietnamese's banh my (bread) is longer and bigger than a foot long sub from subway... and more flavors and healthier ofc
(0)that's why Asians wear glasses.... they can't put contacts in ^.^
#47 - On 03/01/2010 at 12:07pm by EllOfficial
(0)that's just mean! there are white/latinos/european dudes who have small dicks too.
but yeah, I once saw an Asian porn were all the guys had teeny tiny dicks. Made me think they all have small ones.
#52 - On 03/01/2010 at 12:30pm by jellybean120
(0)agreed with blitzen;
Asians don't have fucken small penis's.
trust me; but there's some that do kay.
#75 - On 03/01/2010 at 4:00pm by Misguided_Ghost
(0)@Melodey123 : I have been with an Asian guy before (Chinese) and he was not small at all.
#89 - On 03/01/2010 at 5:32pm by chikiitaaa
(0)A solitary creature, the cougar stalks it's prey. After a long chase, she pounces! But unfortunatley, there is very little meat on this prey. Looks like thus cougar will go hungry.
(-1)It's nothing to do with being shallow, just sex is an important part of a relationship so if the guy doesn't satisfy you what's the point?! all parts of the relationship must work. I would never point and laugh or be mean about it though.
#95 - On 03/01/2010 at 5:52pm by moonshine_bek
(0)you guys are all stereotypical not all Asians have small dicks that's like saying white girls have no ass and white guys are duece bags.
#96 - On 03/01/2010 at 6:06pm by latesharocks865
(0)ok you must not know the p-niz p-rawmid, it goes:
1. - Black
2. - Messkin
3. - Indian
4. - White
5. - AZN
#97 - On 03/01/2010 at 6:18pm by cookiemobzta
(0)uh that stereotype isn't true and I'm living proof. My eyes are actually huge and I'm vietnamese and I have an average sized... yeah XD but i'm still in puberty so it may grow bigger. But Asians are ninja in bed though XD
(0)haha use an elastic if it matters that much u small cocked pice
#103 - On 03/01/2010 at 6:46pm by cartermc17
(0)okay dipshits, listen up. when someone says asians have small weiners, they don't mean EVERY SINGLE asian no exception ... and they don't mean people of other races can't have baby pricks too. the fact is, asians on average are at the shorter end of the dick-o-meter.
#106 - On 03/01/2010 at 7:06pm by Haileykins
(0)well to a certian extent bigger means you can do more postions meaning wilder better sex
#110 - On 03/01/2010 at 7:25pm by bigboy_245
(0)I agree with blitzen123 no girl likes a small sausage lol
#123 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:24pm by morfoodpleezz
(0)Hate to break it to you but the biggest dick in the world is white and his name is Jonah Falcon. 13.5 inches not bad for a white guy.
(0)@ #118. I'm only saying that I saw an Asian porn and sadly all the guys had tiny dicks. I didn't say all Asians had small penises. I'm sure there might be a some black guys out there with small dicks, too.
#145 - On 03/02/2010 at 12:35am by jellybean120
(0)that's something that only guys with a small dick say, size matters. (Y)
#186 - On 03/02/2010 at 9:54pm by ahandsomedevil
(0)Don't feel too bad. He at least got a chance to have sex. Some girls would have looked at it and just plainly said 'ah no ,that thing is not coming near me'. Sorry Op. They do make finger condoms for when you cut yourself, just in case there's a second date. Then you would deserve in.
#68 - On 03/01/2010 at 3:15pm by sourgirl101
(0)Why are girls such bitches. I feel sorry for the poor guy. She liked him but because he had a small dick she makes it an fml? Big dick doesnt = good sex. Using ur tongue and fingers with ur dick is far more effective and size becomes irrelevant.
(0)as opposed to guys who wouldn't even think of posting an fml about a chick who was sloppy loose or tiny boobs.
also to all of the stereo typing going on: i have been with big and small guys of black white and Asian
#172 - On 03/02/2010 at 10:32am by jenni_1285
(0)that's what you get for putting too much anticipation into it.
#3 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:06am by roryriddle
(0)That's what I was wondering. He should know whether it's going to fit or not.
#25 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:44am by ohSNAPyall
(0)I'll bet you not even the alcohol poisoning will make him forget his hurt pride x)
#5 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:09am by KurouTenshi
(0)If you end up at the gym with him I bet you can lift more weight too.
Go to cougerlife.com and get your hook-up there.
#8 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:14am by CallMeHush
(0)@62 : Indeed, there is something behind that pillow.
http://www.profil3.com/pic/73247/0/Naked_bunny_caught_on_camera.html#photo_top
(0)Wow. Just wow. I've been with a couple of men who had small penises, but keeping a condom on was never an issue. FYL
#18 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:25am by DreamerofWorlds
(0)Is it possible for a penis during erection to be smaller than the diameter of a condom? I think he was just nervous and couldn't get it up.
#21 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:34am by 4toestatue
(0)<.< FHL
Did he realize that it was a bad thing? Or was he thinking like "Hell yeah no condom" xD
#23 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:41am by simonsaysYDI
(0)it's not the size that matters, it's how you use it. ;D
[That's what people with small penises say]
FYL.
#27 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:48am by frikkinhannah
(0)Her: Just who do you think you're going please with that little thing?
Him: Me.
#28 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:50am by CallMeHush
(0)maybe you didn't turn me on try harder yourself then maybe he will get hard for u
#153 - On 03/02/2010 at 1:31am by hammervice
(0)Why Viagra? Then she would have to deal with a tiny penis for 4/5 hrs. I think she's been though enough. OMG my iPhone just finish the word Viagra on it's own. I bet some people at the Apple store are getting some free samples!
#70 - On 03/01/2010 at 3:26pm by sourgirl101
(0)Now that you are back on the market, you should use this guy to develop mad deep-throating skills. Guys with normal-sized and big dicks will love what you've learned from training on the teeny-peeny.
When you get to the point where you can take his whole length, teabag him and start to give him a rim job simultaneously, then you are ready to trade up to an average-sized cock.
(0)...and how do you expect her to practice deep throating on a small dick that doesn't even reach the back of her throat?
(0)kcyrusm, I'm thinking that if she opens so wide to fit the rest of his itty-bitty junk and trying to wrap around for the asshole's asshole, she might get a bit of a tickle on her uvula, thus completing the first step of training.
(I have no real knowledge about this. I just making it up.)
(0)lol yup i mean she'll never get good at a blowjob lol rofl :)
#94 - On 03/01/2010 at 5:49pm by lolrofl818
@Perdix...ah ha! This would explain why most of your encounters end in tears?! Your tears! With the woman saying "Well you're not the worst I've ever had"....
I'm so on to you now!
#148 - On 03/02/2010 at 12:43am by aly627
(0)Hey, where are you with that pizza, woman? Did you remember the extra cheese?
I've had my assortment of edible lubes and boxes of Kleenex sitting out for days waiting for you!
I was detained at the airport?! Apparently, if you try to board a plane with a large pizza(extra cheese), whipped cream(dessert),lotion and handcuffs you are marked as an international terrorist?? weird?
#169 - On 03/02/2010 at 10:07am by aly627
(0)WTF, that's so weird! You and I both know that you were going to terrorize me in my domicile, making you a domestic terrorist.
You made the right call bringing the pizza. It's hard to find a good pizza in Houston, but it probably been more convenient to pick up the other items when you get here. We have better sex shops than pizza parlors :)
Of course, the more you invest in our encounter, the greater the disappointment and the harder I'll weep. I think it's that that turns you on;)
I think this is the first time I've been called DOMESTIC! I should tell you now- before this goes any further... I am the most undomesticated woman on the east coast. If YOU are not cooking WE are not eating.
I'm afraid your disappointment will be greater than mine... However, I do look lovely in an apron and heels?!
#175 - On 03/02/2010 at 2:47pm by aly627
(0)I can cook. What skills do you bring to the table? If they are too hot for the Intimacy page, you may want to PM me. You know, to avoid shocking some of the more sensitive readers;)
Oh Perdix! You should know that any skill worth having is better SHOWN
.... not described!
Have you ever been...to Boston???? I would love to show you around.
~insert sly smile and eyebrow raise here~
#190 - On 03/03/2010 at 12:31am by aly627
(0)^awwwww hahaha that's horrible. but a win comment I must say!
#79 - On 03/01/2010 at 4:18pm by Rosalie_Haostn
(-1)Today, this fat chick insisted that I take her back to my place. I too was wasted so i said wth. we got back, she stripped down. I was so sick after looking at her naked that I couldn't get hard anymore. Fml
(0)Perdix, always has the smartest ishh to say.
but I agree, how would you handle an average sized peeny if the small one you practice on doesn't reach the throat?
haha
#64 - On 03/01/2010 at 2:54pm by D_Marquisa1
(0)ha! my best friend lost her virginity to a guy like that! only she didn't pop either.
#65 - On 03/01/2010 at 3:00pm by jordalinajones
(0)what if it was like 12 in. long, just no width. haha she didn't say it was too short. small is a subjective word
#67 - On 03/01/2010 at 3:12pm by YaWk3Y_BoMb3r
(0)that's all fake! if ur drunk u wouldn't have noticed that his penis was small at all, u wouldn't have even remembered that night
(0)not everyone blacks out when they drink... I can drink pretty heavily and remember everything I've done the night before... and I rarely drink.
(0)this is why you don't jump in the sack on the first date.
#99 - On 03/01/2010 at 6:37pm by ScruLuce
(0)ROTFLMAO and not if the Asian is mixed with other stuff then you'd have a better chance I think. but damn girl FYL that's y I hate havin expectations or try not to hav high ones so I won't b dissappointed!!
#104 - On 03/01/2010 at 6:56pm by kayPandastyle
(+1)You are most likely a stuck up blonde bitch op. It isn't his fault his penis is small he can't help it. Stuff like this pisses me off. I'm 17 and barely fit in a b cup bra and people talk shit cause my boobs are small people are so dumb. He can't help his penis is small and he doesn't need bitches like you making him feel like shit.
#111 - On 03/01/2010 at 7:40pm by niesenator
(0)first of all, ydi for trying to get laid right after divorce. and second, i'm Asian and i'm above average... just not big xD
(0)Wow, the divorce must have been really traumatic for you. I'm so sorry to hear you couldn't get it on with a guy you had been humping in your mind while you waited for the legal process of getting rid of your loser husband to get wrapped up. Which is more than either of us can say for your new beau.
#120 - On 03/01/2010 at 9:44pm by BlueBomber
(0)that is not true intirley...asians olny r 1in. on average than ze amewicans...dont know if its a sterio type or a fact but i heard indians are the tiniest
(0)americans...they can't love anyone if they can't have sex
#129 - On 03/01/2010 at 10:39pm by bezach
(+1)I must comment on this. I like a guy who has what I call a babydick. He's a great guy. He's hot, sexy, handsome, has a fine ass, great personality, and yet he has a babydick. I got no problem with it. It's cute.
#132 - On 03/01/2010 at 11:17pm by SenGaeriel
(+1)He says that condoms are way too big. I have to agree. Even the normal sized condoms are too big for average sized dicks.
#134 - On 03/01/2010 at 11:21pm by SenGaeriel
(+1)He also wants me to say that he masturbates only using his finger and thumb.
#151 - On 03/02/2010 at 1:09am by SenGaeriel
(+1)2 3/4 inches hard? that's seriously got to be impossible. maybe in like 5% of guys in the world but that just sounds insane lol
(+1)It's true, though. That is how big, or in this case, small, he is.
#159 - On 03/02/2010 at 2:04am by SenGaeriel
(+1)Wow tell him i feel sorry for him. But hes lucky to have someone like u. Sure makes me feel better though =P
(0)ROFL. I Never thought that would be an issue but . . . welcome to the 'I never lnew they 'came' that small club. FHL, too. Notuch he can do about it other than buff up the tongue. ;)
(0)niesenator- are you babydick's mom?!? OMG you are, aren't you! Bitty boobs gives birth to babydick. Awww.
(0)A small sized condom is six inches long. That is also the average size for an erect penis. If your penis is smaller, a condom can slip off. It happens.
#146 - On 03/02/2010 at 12:37am by SenGaeriel
(0)on that p-niz pyramid thing you should put French people between white and asians. :p
#161 - On 03/02/2010 at 2:35am by smitty4ever
(0)Actually Asain men have an average of a 5.5 inch penis. India men have the smallest penis, can't remember the length, but it was so small that they had to make smaller condoms for them.
Btw I know this because I watch the show Manswers, it's funny as hell and educational :D But that was a Manswers question, which country has the smallest penis and it was India men
#166 - On 03/02/2010 at 6:32am by LadyAshley
(0)it's not size, it's the way it's used!
my ex had a small penis, but I
miss sex more w/ him than anyone
I was ever w/.
#176 - On 03/02/2010 at 3:00pm by hmmmummhmmm
(0)that really sucks... now's the timeyou laugh at it and walk away!
#177 - On 03/02/2010 at 3:28pm by MissAndreaSummer
(0)Did he notice your perfectly sized perky breasts, flawless skin without any stretch marks, cellulite or wrinkles, slim thighs
(0)haha. FYL. No worries. I've had that happened to me before. This guy and i were krazy in love and he had that same problem...he then asked me if i thought he was big or small. i just told him i dont like answering them types of questions. lol
#182 - On 03/02/2010 at 5:37pm by rawr_trick119
(0)shallow much?!!!
And for the record, not all Asian guys have small cocks. And not all black/white/etc guys have big cocks as well.
If ever a guy does have a small cock, long as he can make a pussy cum, he's good to go...
#188 - On 03/03/2010 at 12:11am by beer01
(0)Lolz!
I've been there......
BLECH!!
Hopefully that guy never calls you again...
It's time to be "busy" and "have other plans"......
basically, just let him know he's not in the running for anything more interesting, if you know what I mean.
Sorry, hon, but it happens....
Have a good laugh (or 10,000) and move on. :-D
(0)awwwwwwww that sux ass. oh well......... there are other guys wit much bigger ones!
#197 - On 03/03/2010 at 7:31pm by funny921
(0)shut up man u ppl are so racist not all asians have small dicks....i date one and i dont like the mean comments about asians
(0)wow that's funny I'm gonna agree size does matter
#207 - On 03/18/2010 at 1:27am by XxHardcorexFMLxX
(0)HAHA omg I've had that happen to me too...except i couldn't stop laughing the entire time....I was drunk but he was a very nice guy just the whole small penis thing didn't work for me in the end
#209 - On 04/21/2010 at 3:11am by lovingmybabyjade
(0)why's everyone being so rude about Asians?I'm not Asian but WTF is everyones problem? I've never seen an Asian dick but I bet it's bigger than any of you racist people's.
#210 - On 04/21/2010 at 6:18pm by Charlotteeexx
(0)Awwww....Maybe that's karma from your ex-husband for divorcing him. Was his dick bigger than this new guy's?
#213 - On 06/08/2010 at 11:10pm by fakeaccountX
(0)144- but it's okay for dudes to judge a girl on the size of her tits, right? Don't be a hypocrite... Sometimes too small is just too small... and it goes both ways...
