FML: I checked my voicemail. I was really surprised to hear an adorable message from my boyfriend, who...

FMyLife

Get the guts to spill the beans

Advanced search - last

Submit your FML story

- Concept : An anecdote always starts with "Today" and ends with "FML". There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
- CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
- If your story isn't published on the website, don't feel offended, and thank you nevertheless!

Net Avenir : gestion publicitaire

Close the advertisement

Today, I checked my voicemail. I was really surprised to hear an adorable message from my boyfriend, who was vacationing in Florida. I was even more surprised to hear him having sex with some other girl for the last seven minutes of the message. FML

#3478288 (120)

I agree, your life sucks (42389) - you totally deserved it (1369)

On 07/04/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by hangup (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Share on Facebook

ReTweet

More FMLs?

hot_mess88's life also sucks

Sleepy also deserved it

Comments

succcks

#1 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:49pm by RosarioRivera

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.

They only record up to 1 minute unless its a old tape 1.. which i dont think you have... LIAR

#17 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:11pm by ndanick

its on a cellphone dumbass lol

#23 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:18pm by wickliffe

People still use tapes for voice mail? That's a shame...

OP: That sucks. Well he'll surely be surprised about you breaking up with him LOL

#65 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:25pm by bdaniels362

#17 I beg to differ. My friends have a habit of leaving me 5-minute voicemails just to annoy me.

#69 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:53pm by eastmanwolf

How certain are you he was having sex?
Did the woman actually scream his name or something?

#75 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:22pm by Ughsucks

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.

Hmmm...not sure if this is true. The last thing a guy wants to do before he gets some ass from a girl is tell her, "Hold on slut, I want to call my REAL girlfriend and leave her a romantic message."

Next, I don't care what kind of phone you have, ten minutes (or more than seven whatever) for a voicemail message? No, I don't think so. Sorry. Wayyyy too much time.

#86 - On 07/04/2009 at 6:57pm by Aish

sorry aish or whatver it is...youre completely wrong on that part because i have had a ten minute message before...and some men are just pigs and they would do soemthing like that

#90 - On 07/04/2009 at 7:18pm by suicide_girl

@90 well then she totally deserves it for dating someone whos clearly a "pig"

#92 - On 07/04/2009 at 8:23pm by organisedchaos

have you heard of a cellphone or a ditgital phone?

#94 - On 07/04/2009 at 8:53pm by MyCubicleRomance

Them Florida prostitutes.... Just too damn tempting. I hope he had to pay alot for her. cause now hes payin with his heart and his penis

#98 - On 07/04/2009 at 10:53pm by MasterModeraor

Maybe he was talking to the other girl, and ACCIDENTALLY called his real girlfriend?

And voice mails do last that long. My friends call me and leave me 10 minute voice mails constantly to annoy me.

#99 - On 07/04/2009 at 10:56pm by inerdablanket

wow...i've never called anyone who had a voicemail of 7 minutes. that's ridiculous.

#102 - On 07/05/2009 at 1:07am by curryndricegirll

perhaps she wasnt aware of the fact that he was a pig - he was clearly sneaky seeing as he covered his tracks by calling her and leaving a nice message before getting into it with this other chick, just not well enough apparently seeing as he forgot to hang up.

#103 - On 07/05/2009 at 2:04am by ms33

Yeah really, it could've been porn in the background...

#111 - On 07/05/2009 at 11:30am by quarterback

He probably called her and said those things to make her believe he's not doing anything wrong...are you that stupid? and I've easily had 10 minute messages on my cell phone before, it's not rocket science -_-

#113 - On 07/05/2009 at 8:29pm by skittlesxmonster

yeeeah, how exactly do you hear someone having sex...?

and for seven minutes? wow.

#114 - On 07/05/2009 at 9:06pm by lalaimbored

To all dumbasses who think this is fake because of the length of the message: Unless you are on some insane penny pinching, change-rolling, organ-selling phone service, there isn't a one minute limit to voicemails. There is also a new invention called a CELLULAR TELEPHONE. Called 'cell phone' for short. This device also allows you to leave a message for however long you want.

#124 - On 03/12/2010 at 3:38pm by ReyEr9412

At least he's having fun!

#2 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:50pm by Lozza

lmffffao!!!

#24 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:20pm by xij3ss

ex boyfriend now, i hope

#3 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:52pm by alyssamarie218

Whoa, shitty.

#4 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:52pm by sarakthx

When are you going to tell him?

#5 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:52pm by SuperSpore

What a thoughtful way of breaking up with someone.

#6 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:53pm by srpkinja31

HAHA, I know people who hated their partners and have done this intentionally.

#112 - On 07/05/2009 at 4:12pm by licwid

This comment has been moderated.

#8 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:54pm by hossgray

Wow that's messed up!

#9 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:56pm by vandam500

that sucks

#10 - On 07/04/2009 at 1:59pm by raseanador

Did you notice if his skills are improving?

#11 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:00pm by DarthJeff

^^FTW 

#123 - On 01/31/2010 at 7:54pm by bettadenne1

Damn. Go key his car or something.

#12 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:01pm by angorashi

dump his ass

#13 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:02pm by CaptainPat

Maybe he was masturbating...

#14 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:04pm by Whirling_Kumquat

of all times to call you

#15 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:04pm by colourmealy

I know, right?

"Shit, I feel kinda guilty about this. I'm going to call my girlfriend."
"Oh, I'll just get up and -"
"Nonono, just stay right there, it'll only take a second."
"..."
*beep beep boop boop beep beep beep*
"...Hey babe!"

Sexay.

#20 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:13pm by haxromana

Bang him back.

#16 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:09pm by Jim9349

Hey, better that you heard it, in my opinion. Now you can leave the manwhore and find someone better.

#18 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:11pm by haxromana

FYL. and FHL if you have an evil plan.

#19 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:12pm by thatgirl21

That really sucks.. hope he gets run over or something.

#21 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:16pm by alexis0fdreams

WTF THAT IS MEAN

#37 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:14pm by fuzion50

rotfl.

#87 - On 07/04/2009 at 7:05pm by xxrawr_betchxx

That sucks.... I have had that happen!!!!! Then I took a bat to his truck!

#22 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:17pm by SweetTea90

Ummm, voicemail messages do not last over 7 minutes....

#25 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:26pm by jadeddream

They do if you forget to hang up properly after you leave the message :P

#43 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:22pm by purple5

I have loads of voicemails that go to at least 15 minutes. Unfortunatly some of the are of a friend of mine having sex with her boyfriend. You'd think she'd learn to turn her phone off before doing someone by now. Ew, I'm giving too much information. So yeah, this is a FYL and you should get back at him.

#74 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:17pm by ZombieKnickers

call him and "accidentally" leave a voicemail as you're bangin his best friend

#26 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:26pm by lissygirl

You should send a steamier reply.

Kick him to the curb though, cheaters never change and you've got one on your hands.

#27 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:26pm by startafire

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment.

Ow, that is terribly.
When my boyfriend brek up with me, i send him an e-mail with the song Fuck you by Lily Allen and said it was from me. He getted so mad. Lol. But, that isn´t the same, caus he wasn´cheating on me... i mean, i didn´have sex with him! I am to young and... just forget it. Lol. x]

#28 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:32pm by Sparkled

No one cares, just so you know.

#31 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:50pm by Atropos

agreed

#44 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:23pm by pchands00

I know.

#47 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:28pm by Sparkled

lol #28, how old are you, 12? please learn how to type/speak english properly.

#52 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:46pm by lolatyouhaha

Kill yourself fast.

#72 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:10pm by hudsonnn

If you sent him an email with an attachment, wouldn't he already know its from you? Seeing how its your email address that comes up and all that... So why would you have to say its from you?

#76 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:22pm by ZombieKnickers

The people on this site need to start moderating the people who sign up for FML. We don't need 10 year olds complaining about their exes in complete jibberish.

#82 - On 07/04/2009 at 6:17pm by srpkinja31

18 +

#84 - On 07/04/2009 at 6:24pm by suicide_girl

#31 & #52,
agreeee.

#88 - On 07/04/2009 at 7:07pm by xxrawr_betchxx

#105 - On 07/05/2009 at 3:45am by nodbor

This comment has been moderated.

#29 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:36pm by diabetic_rage

sorry people but even on a cell phone you can leave a voicemail message as long as you want...only if the other person has it set up that way...but karmas a bitch i hope you gte him back...just go fuck his brother to get back at him :D

#30 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:46pm by suicide_girl

What if he don´t have a brother? Go f*** his bestfriend or something.

#32 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:51pm by Sparkled

Girl... was thinking the same thing. If there is no brother, then fuck his uncle. or his mother. like a boss... at least someone who has a some authority over him so he's doubly fucked. >.>

Evil plans indeed. and surely she knows what her boyfriend sounds like having sex vs. faping to porn. These are different sounds. Anyone unsure of this is not doing it right.

#39 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:17pm by mercyFML

Lol, right. >xD

#40 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:20pm by Sparkled

I like your idea, she could also hit his car with a bat and then when police ask be like with the most innocent face " No officer, I have been home and I would never do something like that. Only a crazy bitch would do that"

#45 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:25pm by SweetTea90

what if his best friend was a girl o wait that would be kinda hot nvm

#48 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:29pm by Enigma1313

Sorry for saying this, but isn´t that a little dumb? I mean, it is not very smart to lie to a police.

#49 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:29pm by Sparkled

My dear, there is a fine line between what is said as a joke, and what is said in a completely serious manner.

You'd do well to learn it.

#53 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:47pm by AndelleRae

Did you say that to me???

#55 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:48pm by Sparkled

no he said it to the invisible fairy that lives in his head...... lets hope you know what sarcasm is?

#63 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:09pm by posampo

I got away with it....... lol I know its dumb but thats what a bf gets when you catch him in the act. His truck gets smashed.

#64 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:19pm by SweetTea90

hahah pure ingenious...i think you have to know what a joke is to get it *sparkled*

#71 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:06pm by suicide_girl

Hey, I've had some great times with that fairy! (FYI, though, I'm a she, not a he. :-p)

#85 - On 07/04/2009 at 6:51pm by AndelleRae

oh the fun little things that run through my head all day ;)

#91 - On 07/04/2009 at 7:21pm by suicide_girl

i like the way this ended. its like a suspense movie with the odd twist at the end, she WASNT joking. ooo..

#93 - On 07/04/2009 at 8:29pm by organisedchaos

Mmm, fairies. Tasty! >:D

#97 - On 07/04/2009 at 10:51pm by CyclonePsycho

Yea jump on his best friends nuts. That would be funny

#33 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:55pm by FuzzyWalnuts

lol! XD

#35 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:59pm by Sparkled

lmfaoo i like how your talking about testicles, and your name is fuzzywalnuts XD

#117 - On 07/06/2009 at 8:56pm by sallay

That sucks

#34 - On 07/04/2009 at 2:57pm by luvedward4evr

You should call him up, leave him a sweet and thoughtful message, and then do the EXACT same thing. just start having sex with some other dude. Make sure it's really loud (:

#36 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:03pm by lmfao25

thats fucked up

#38 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:17pm by fuzion50

the real sad part is that you actual stayed on the phone and listened to him having sex for 7 minutes istead of hanging up

#41 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:20pm by kc2

Today, i was having a one night stand with some guy. He surprised me by calling his girlfriend to leave a cute message before the sex. It only lasted 7 minutes. I'm not talking about the phone call. FML

#42 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:21pm by pchands00

Win.

#50 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:32pm by EmpyreanGoddess

omfg, roflmfao!!!! :D

#62 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:05pm by werewolf_13

Wow. That sucks.

#46 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:26pm by scarlett29

Lol @42. And damn that sux

#51 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:41pm by lilcuti3pi389

To everyone who claims that voice mails can't be longer than 1 minute are idiots. That may be true on some devices but I can name countless times where I've left 10 minute prank calls on my friend's phone and I can even take a screen shot of my visual voice mail on my G1 that shows some messages that I have that are even five minutes long. God I hate people who act like they know everything and come off as so damn convicted about it =/

#54 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:48pm by stfuminjakid

yo this is 2009, half these kids dont even know what a cassette is!

#56 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:52pm by bigems

Cassette? Whaaaat?
Just kidding, of course i know what a cassete is, it is just not that... popular. Lol. xD

#59 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:56pm by Sparkled

what a crappy boyfriend! Sorry :(

#57 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:52pm by live_your_life

Not sure why you listened to the entire seven minutes of it, or why he'd start having sex that soon after leaving you a message, so I'm kinda wondering if this is even real.

#60 - On 07/04/2009 at 3:58pm by jmgirl

save that message

#66 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:37pm by AshleyRose784

have all his shit packed at the door when he gets back and if he asks why his stuff is at the door say ask that bitch you were fucking in florida

#67 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:49pm by MissxKim

40/Enigma1313- Joey? Is that you?

#68 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:50pm by technobutterfly

WHAT A DICK. :( I'm sorry.... holy crap.

#70 - On 07/04/2009 at 4:58pm by bahamamama90

I hope you meant ex...

#73 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:12pm by justaquietghost

#2 fail.

#77 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:38pm by KiddNYC10

so what?

#78 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:46pm by amy_shmamy

I guess #78 is use to having her boyfriend cheat on her so it doesn't really bother her anymore.

#79 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:48pm by seb12992

hahah awesome...that one just made my day. thanks seb12992

#80 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:53pm by suicide_girl

brings new meaning to "i'm having fun, wish you were here."

#81 - On 07/04/2009 at 5:56pm by baileys82

Let me fuck u n leave it on his voicemail

#83 - On 07/04/2009 at 6:18pm by MIKENYC

k serrrriously, sparkled,
how old are you? like 9?....

#89 - On 07/04/2009 at 7:09pm by xxrawr_betchxx

Wow, what a vagina. Get even!

#101 - On 07/05/2009 at 12:42am by emmasue782

What cellphone services let you go over 5 minutes? Most cut you off at around 3.

#104 - On 07/05/2009 at 2:47am by MoobyTheCow

EPIC. FAIL.

Those are the first two things that come into mind when I think of your BF :D
Yeah. Remind him to press the red button to actually stop the voicemail next time.

#106 - On 07/05/2009 at 4:07am by Snowlight

Get another man, have sex wtih him and send your asshole boyfriend the video!!!!

#107 - On 07/05/2009 at 4:27am by Thunk

So? What was the "adorable" message?

#108 - On 07/05/2009 at 7:53am by shnibz101

97, LOL

#109 - On 07/05/2009 at 7:54am by shnibz101

Exactly what Aish said. They hit both the things I was thinking. For the first time I'm gonna have to call b.s. on an FML.

#110 - On 07/05/2009 at 9:25am by lesp

haha.this dude musta been drunk. but are u really sure he was boinking her

#115 - On 07/06/2009 at 2:12am by grimeysly

seven minutes? psh good thing your breaking up with him (hopefully)

#116 - On 07/06/2009 at 3:41am by Laurrr109

YDI for listening to the full voicemail to know he was having sex on your voicemail for seven minutes.

#118 - On 07/06/2009 at 10:40pm by jessicaclaire

How could he not possibly notice that he didnt trun off the voice mail after finishing his message?
Well anyways, that was pretty dry & harsh
and the best solution for this is dumping him!