Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I gave my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. Apparently, I was so bad at it that he eventually just slapped my hand away and angrily said he'd do it himself. FML
Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I started to put my hands down his pants and jokingly said, "Sorry, I'm not very good at hand jobs." He replied, "I know." FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having a romantic night. As we were having sex, he decided to say, "Look mom, no hands!" and it totally ruined the mood. FML
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
Today, I had sex with this guy who I like very much. As he went to leave, I decided to give him one last thrill. I reached down his pants and started to rub and stroke him. He abruptly pulled my hand out. When I asked why, he pointed behind me. My mom had watched the whole thing. FML
Today, I was riding in the car with my boyfriend. While he was driving, I held out my hand as an offer for him to hold it. Instead, he grabs me by the wrist and shoves my hand down his pants. Lovely. FML
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Top comments
Tpracingkg 15
Practice makes perfect
spekledworf 18
I hope it wasn't in public. I work at a movie theater and have walked in on worse than handjobs. We don't appreciate it.
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Comments (109)
Tpracingkg 15
Practice makes perfect
Damian95 16
Sometimes ya just gotta keep on keepin on!!!
ZeroPath5 16
North and South, North and South. No East and West
spiritfang11237 16
actually perfect practice makes perfect. He needs to tell and perhaps show OP what he likes versus what OP was doing.
amypr 20
Yup. Time for OP to invest in a Shake Weight!
DragonText 4
Well you at least get an A for effort
moimoimoi125_fml 11
I think she got the D. Or not.
Ziggy122 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Ugh. Don't do that shit in public. Save it for the bedroom.
Phoebe_Buffay 14
You never know, they could've been watching the movie at home. :)... But then again I don't know if that qualifies as a date haha.
Q10 5
Doing it in public makes it more exciting and naughty :)
spekledworf 18
I hope it wasn't in public. I work at a movie theater and have walked in on worse than handjobs. We don't appreciate it.
Thundering_Jibbs 13
#49, until OP's BF cums on the poor sap below him
isallwaysme 27
i had to sit on a seat at the theaters that had cum stains on it.
AurumPotestasEst 16
Weren't there other seats?
RedPillSucks 31
Is your boyfriend Pee Wee Herman?? Who the hell does that in public?
Morgiepoooh9822 17
Yeah and it also makes it weird for anyone who might see what's going on. :)
brinnablaine 22
Definitely! PDA is one thing but giving a hand job in a public place is just too trashy.
AestheticGuy 21
@3 & 75 Get over it. I know plenty of nice, normal couples who have done this to add an element of excitement to their sex lives. If you cant handle the idea of sex then stay in your mother's basement.
Spark_Slicker 19
@102 Public society doesn't revolve around what may get some couples off. It's sleazy and disrespectful to not only do it but to assume that everyone should be okay with people preforming sexual acts on each other in front of them because it adds an "element of excitement" for those certain people. No one was saying anything against sex itself. Just that people should have, oh I don't know, a shred of common decency.
charmanderCHAR 5
Who said it was public? You can have movie dates at HOME, brainiac.
enabray138 5
Thank you #3
vipirius 18
If only there was sone kind of button to show your appreciation...
Pleonasm 35
Or a button to reply...
Ziggy122 15
You're welcome, #4.
rob02 19
Better start practicing.
exlexx 12
practice makes perfect.
Zeishah 26
well now you know what you suck at, get practising :p
Iamevil123 16
Clearly not as OP didn't suck. Just an innocent handjob... In public...
Wizardo 33
Dry Style < Lube
99megster 15
How rude! It's not like you're there just to satisfy his sexual urges anyway! And if that's all that he wants from you, then I would get out ASAP.
jhs578650 9
@9 OMG enough with the "he is objectifying you" crap. Asking for a sexual favor (admittedly in public) does not mean that is "all he wants from the OP". Have you ever asked your significant other for a sexual favor?
Pleonasm 35
Apparently not. God forbid your partner ever see you in a sexual light and want intimacy with you! Holy shit, people on their high horses these days. Let's focus on the issues at hand, here: demands in very public areas (slightly inappropriate) and the rudeness given in return for effort on OP's part.
FaygoAndMiracles 18
Hell, this could have even been a movie date at home. Other than what a douche OP's boyfriend was being(Which had nothing to do with sexism or objectification), neither OP nor the boyfriend actually did anything WRONG, unless it wasn't a date at home. OP consented to doing that, it's not sexist or assault or anything of the like.
GothicAngel95 16
I agree with #3 I mean if you're going to do something like that then save for the bedroom not in public cause there's other people around you and no one else is gonna want to know what you and your partner are doing..