Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my bathroom flooded. I frantically cleaned my apartment as fast as I could before the plumber arrived. Everything was finally clean when I let him in. It wasn't until after he finished that I noticed I'd left my anal beads in the shower. There's no way he didn't notice. FML
Today, I was doing some fun scat play with my boyfriend when the fire alarm went off. We both had to scramble into the shower to rinse off, clogged the drain, and left dirty footprints all over the apartment. Then we forgot to turn the shower off and came back to a flood. FML
Today, thanks to my habit of peeing in the shower, I accidentally peed in the bath. FML
Today, my father-in-law decided to "fix" our bathtub and ended up flooding the bathroom. Later, in his attempt to clean things up, he walked, without permission, into my bathroom where my vibrator was right next to my hairdryer. He definitely saw it, and didn’t say anything to me. FML
Today, I wanted to take a romantic bath with my boyfriend. I set up the candles and hot water, but I had to take a dump. After my business was done, I called him into the bath. He walks in, sniffs, glances at the toilet and leaves. Guess what I forgot to flush. FML
Today, my boyfriend walked out of the bathroom, informed me he'd accidentally peed on the floor, and told me I could clean it up when I get a chance. FML
Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML
Today, I flooded my entire kitchen. The water was cut off at night and I left the faucet open without realizing. When the sound woke me up at 5am, the water reached my ankles. I frantically tried to sweep it out before my mother woke up at 6am. I didn't make it. FML
Today, I went to the place I signed for yesterday to pay the first month's rent and get my keys. I looked around before I left, and used the toilet. I went back later to show my boyfriend and found the place flooded an inch with water coming from the toilet. It had been flooding for 7 hours. FML
Today, after just having used the bathroom, my ring fell in the toilet. After stealthily removing it with a toothbrush, I went to go wash it in the sink. It then fell down the drain. FML
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Top comments
JiggaJayZ 16
He didn't ask to clean your pipes too did he?
barlessprison 16
Sounds like the start of a porno. Plumber arrives, you realize you don't have enough cash to pay him. You ask if there's another payment mode and voila, anal beads conveniently appear.
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Comments (160)
whos_ur_daddy1 19
Gross...
feelingold 18
Don't worry, he was probably distracted by the 9-inch ***** you left in the toothbrush holder.
feelingold 18
may god be with you
VioletLife 18
Are you kidding me? So what if a complete stranger sees that? It's not like you have to face him everyday.
whos_ur_daddy1 19
Looks like 31 people think that it's not gross!
KittyWantMilk 4
So far 6 people think you're gross though
feelingold 18
Nah 89, we just think your desire to be #1 wasn't quite matched by your creative talents. But seriously - was it all that you hoped and dreamed?
SerendipityRose 26
Oh, yeah... Totally gross. That's why I make sure to move mine whenever we have--- oh, uhhh... Yeah, nevermind. *discreet cough*
ositoakaluis 16
isn't this how a **** scene starts?
wtffml1979 22
That's what I was thinkin of
Bcfrmkc816 17
Nice reply. Your good
7yzzFML 17
@1 -_- how is it gross? Please do tell us. Especially considering she uses it in the SHOWER. Are you just some kind of prude, is that it?
brickson98 3
You. I like how you think
alissa222 15
He's a plumber, I'm sure hes seen it all already. Just laugh it off.
zandalee 20
Cue Barry White Music....
ozpunker 20
At least he didn't leave his own anal beads behind.
JiggaJayZ 16
He didn't ask to clean your pipes too did he?
Dusty_Busters 15
Or snake your drain?
Liamj774 36
I feel a porno coming on...
epic13 12
Bow chicka wow wow.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
Don't offer him a glass of water, OP!
izzie321 27
All of you are geniuses. Except for #95.. He's doin own thing over there...
Justy101 23
142 - #95 was referring to a previous FML
7yzzFML 17
@95 hahahah i remember that FML! and 142 you are a fool
biggestfan23 11
The only thing I would expect next is some bad acting and corny music
johnnyboy7 5
And kinky sex!
barlessprison 16
Sounds like the start of a porno. Plumber arrives, you realize you don't have enough cash to pay him. You ask if there's another payment mode and voila, anal beads conveniently appear.
nelliegw 26
Nobody ever pays me in beads:(
v1kt4r 13
1 word.. Madigras
xmidnightxlonerx 12
I think you mean Mardi Gras*
zango1 15
Or, anal beads conveniently 'disappear' perhaps.
ajeppsen 25
I pay people in Trident Layers.
kultyre 7
Hopefully he just thought they were pearl necklaces.
Llamacod 11
Or maybe he was hoping to give her a pearl necklace.
wjh100 13
speaking I've seen anal needs the size of a tennis ball I doubt he would assume its a pearl necklace
shaww 28
Good job OP, good job!
Aryn16 14
nasty.. but it's none of his business anyways.
Cusefan5 6
Ydi, why do you wear anal beads?
melons 44
To make her anus look pretty.
ElmoSaysSquishy 28
Because anal stimulation is highly pleasurable for many people?
calucalay 13
because thats her own buisness.
Marmarfarfar 25
You don't wear them...
misterjez 15
Oh I do
allforyoux3 25
Oh my God, 71. Your picture just adds to your comment.
molzipan 16
She drapes them on her ass whenever it has low self esteem. What do you think they're for? jfc.
Lunasis 14
you went full retard... never go full retard
7yzzFML 17
@10 Woww. One, you dont bloody wear them, you shove them up your arse to pleasure either your prostate or the vaginal wall. Two, she does it because it pleasures her, and she likes to feel good, and shes not a prude like you, and its her business, so shutup.
Marmarfarfar 25
Kinky