By wtfjusthappened - 31/01/2014 15:29 - United States - Redmond

Spicy
Today, I went down on the girl of my dreams. While I was down there, I started to put on a condom. As I came back up to start having sex, she told me she couldn't cheat on her boyfriend. FML
I agree, your life sucks 66 790
You deserved it 13 024

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Steffi3 40

Because obviously going down on someone doesn't count as cheating. Wait...

selfsabotage 4

Wonder how her boyfriend would feel about his girlfriends "loyalty". Sucks to be you dude but if this is the girl of your dreams I would think you know enough about her to know she had a boyfriend.

Comments

lilmslady 11

honestly i do t think she ever planned to sleep with you..... :/ sorry op

lilmslady 11

don't* ugh i hate speeling errors!

I think the FML made that abundantly clear.

If this was truly your "dream girl," I would suspect you'd know if she'd have a boyfriend. If you did, you're a horrible human being for even participating in these actions. If you didn't, well sucks to be you.

Your missing a couple grammatical factors yourself.....

Shit just happens in the heat of the moment. It's harder than you think.

People use "the heat of the moment" as an excuse way too much. It's completely bull****. Be responsible and use you head.

#52 - I can't tell whether you're demonstrating perfect irony intentionally and sarcastically, or inadvertently and genuinely. Either way, just reading your comment makes me cringe.

75, thank you! People do not take responsibility for their actions anymore. Cheating should never happen. OP, I hope that you were unaware of her relationship status. A girl that truly likes you won't put you in that type of situation.

killinpoptarts 9

This is when you blackmail her into it. She's already made the commitment... Can't back out nos

#77, your comment made me smile. I was going to say the same thing.

67, while "heat of the moment" does make it hard, you shouldn't be putting yourself into situations that would cause "heat of the moment." It is also easy to say no and get out.

wellthen7154 12

It sounds like OP may have not known. I think the FML comes from 1) not only not getting to have sex (he kinda was there just to please her, and then well yea...) 2) getting told she's not even single. IF, OP did know, first YOU SUCK OP (quite literally I guess), second I suppose the FML would come from her simply not wanting to cheat.

perdix 29

#1, I think she "called an audible." Either he was so good or so bad at oral, she decided that coitus would be unnecessary or terrible, or both.

etoilenuit 15

He could've meant dream girl as in looks wise, not necessarily that he loved her..

Either way the logic is funny. I don't blame op, I blame both. 2 to tengo

Gearden 8

@101 I'm pretty sure that would legally be considered rape.

With her logic about what's considered "cheating", I'm surprised OP couldn't convince her that it's not really cheating because there's a condom barrier in the way.

#109 considering OP didn't get any, he doesn't suck (literally).

Steffi3 40

Because obviously going down on someone doesn't count as cheating. Wait...

Still kind of a bitch move to lead OP on like that :/

perdix 29

#3, that's right. There's even a President for that. Oops, I mean "precedent" Google "Monica Lewinsky."

^ clearly doesn't understand what's going on

Schizomaniac 24
Goblin182 26

You mean, having someone go down on you. Either way, still . . .

I helped get this up here XD and I'm sorry bout that

selfsabotage 4

Wonder how her boyfriend would feel about his girlfriends "loyalty". Sucks to be you dude but if this is the girl of your dreams I would think you know enough about her to know she had a boyfriend.

Lots of people are actually really good at hiding it. He probably didn't know her that well but I have heard of some people dating two different people for months or even years.

Plus, most men are known to pick their dream girls base solely on looks. He could have never paid attention to the details in her life. However, this is still not an excuse for what happened.

wellthen7154 12

First I thought the FML read: The girl IN my dreams, so I was kind of confused....

#91, I think that's called a stereotype. And besides, in this case, it was clearly the girl who only cared about looks, not OP.

arandomusernameaa 20

#127 ... "Hey, you know your girlfriend? Well I sort of..." That would ... go down ... really well with the boyfriend wouldn't it...

Shouldn't be anyone's "dream girl" if she was willing to get in bed with another man. OP deserves better, she's not a fit girlfriend for anyone if she's a cheater.

hatemyluck 15

How do we know if op deserves better? He could have known about the girl's boyfriend and still decided to sleep with her.

Without OP stating anything, we don't know for sure. If he didn't, he deserves better. If he did, they're obviously both scum. Hopefully OP isn't that much of a twat to be fine with ruining someone else's relationship. I don't get why people don't realize that if someone is going to cheat with them, the cheater's just going to cheat on them eventually.

Am I the only one who thinks she used OP for his tongue?? I dunno, maybe he's Gene Simmons or something...

Don't you mean Gene Simmons? That dude has an alien's tongue!

No, I'm pretty sure he meant Gene Simmons.

Pretty sure Gene Simmons is exactly what #7 said. And is therefore exactly what they meant.

But what he REALLY meant was Gene Simmons.

asnakelovinbabe 16

Sorry 34 but I'm pretty sure you're mistaken... He meant Gene Simmons.

RileyTheCoyote 6

Guys c'mon. He means Gene Simmons. Get it together.

You know what? I'm not fully comprehending what he meant. was it Gene Simmons ( emphasis on the S), or the less popular Gene Simmons (emphasis on the first n)?

wellthen7154 12

Wow you guys did not get it. OBVIOUSLY he meant Gene Simmons the long lost ANTEATER....

Holy crap. Seriously? Why didn't she tell you BEFORE you went down on her? FYL OP.

Because after she got hers she was like peace out!

Yea, because every cheater gives a pre coital life update.

yoursucklives 36

even if she was the girl of your dreams, you shouldn't sleep with her if you know she has a boyfriend. it was still more of a bitchmove on her side, because she shouldn't fool around with other guys.

yoursucklives 36

that's why i said "if you know..." but i think if it was the girl of his dreams, he would know such things about her!

buttcramp 21

I agree with you #17, since op put it to us that way it leads me to believe he knows her fairly well. Plus these days, you can simply check someone's Facebook to find their relationship status! Still, it's the girl's fault in my opinion. Sounds like a girl that will break your heart, OP (if she didn't already)

razzledazzle21 23

He doesn't necessarily know her well. I could look at a random attractive guy on the street and say he's my dream guy. Sounds like it was probably a bar hookup thing to me.

145 - my Facebook doesn't tell people anything about me! Not everyone likes the entire world knowing about every minute of their lives.