Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, while on vacation, my brother asked a native of the area for help. Once he got it, he thanked them with "Muchos gracias" in the best Spanish accent he could do. We're in Japan. FML
Today, I almost got written up for insubordination by my boss. All I did was explain to him that I couldn't help a tourist out because I speak Japanese, not Korean, and that it's not in fact "the same Asian shit" as he seemed to think. FML
Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. While under the influence of the drugs, I tried to speak Japanese. Later, my Japanese roommate informed me that I was saying "I am a weasel" over and over again. FML
Today, my brother thought it'd be hilarious to tease a group of Pokémon players. They thought it'd be hilarious to beat both our asses. FML
Today, while on a vacation, I tried to step out of myself and flirt with this boy who I thought was cute. He was going along with it and nodding so I thought it was working. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he didn't speak English. FML
Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML
Today, I brought my Japanese girlfriend home for dinner with my family for the first time. They all got drunk and made heaps of racist jokes right in front of us. My dad forgot her name and started calling her "Rice Ball" instead. FML
Today, I was verbally abused by a tourist because neither I nor anyone else in my country can speak "proper English". We're in England - clue's in the name, dipshit. FML
Today, my grandpa who is staying with us mistook me for a Japanese soldier and started to hit me with a bat. This is the second night in a row. FML
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Top comments
SoulEaterSE 23
Someone watched too much anime
Emma1562 35
Your brother sounds like a dumbass
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Comments (103)
Georgia0p 17
Next FML: I said hi how are you in Japanese to some people in Japan today and they beat the crap out of me. FML. Did he know what the words meant..?
Recon13x 9
Looks like the brother had his priorities straight. Learn the insults before the greetings.
mohamed_H 21
I don't think people would beat the shit out of you if you told them hi how are you. Lol read carefully
clairelaliberte 16
No, I think what's meant here, 65, is that the brother may have thought that "Banks sugoi kawaii" meant "Hi, how are you?" and so was confused as to why they were angry.
chriss2015 13
I think you guys are missing the sarcasm. They were saying that from the brothers perspective, he doesn't even realize what he said was wrong. He thought he was saying "hi, how are you."
Georgia0p 17
Um I did read it carefully, I'm saying maybe he didn't know what he was saying..
Emma1562 35
Your brother sounds like a dumbass
daniel271 13
More like beyond dumbass.
DeltaDragonxx 20
to dumbassery, and beyond!
MeltedMango 8
I think OP already said something along those lines
x_37 9
of course he is. he watches anime
SoulEaterSE 23
Someone watched too much anime
kudwafuuu 15
if he watched a lot of anime he'd probably know other phrases or how to say hello at the very least lol
EmoKami 21
My thoughts exactly! Lol he hasn't watched enough anime!
bvo_27 14
No such thing as too much!!
Axel5238 29
Sadly, being a fan doesn't mean they pay attention to the language or the culture. I have 2 friends that claim to be huge anime fans but just only just the anime. They know nothing of the language or culture. Just that to a disturbing point really like Japan's cartoons and video games and it's become a way of live for both.
Mpii 11
The opposite happens very often aswell. I for instance really like the language so I started learning it. Whenever people find tgat out they're like "oh you must watch alot of anime!" And I really dont. I've gotten into naruto and that's basically it.
ChinchillaLady 27
I love Naruto! Along with other shows but I had started learning Japanese first and actually for me watching it in Japanese has helped me learn... Or atleast I'd like to think so.
sonasonic 34
Half-heartedly learning Japanese and using Japanese phrases in regular sentences really serves to show just how retarded they are.
MichelleMaBelle_fml 16
I watch very few animes, and I'm trying to learn Japanese. I think it's hard.
Ethan_Anonymous 28
Damn weebs
rachelthelime_fml 29
Are you both okay now?
cheshirecat13242 32
Should've tried "Domo arragato, mr. Roboto!"
MidnaLink 35
A) Arigato B) I like that movie, but that can be very annoying.
ohSNAPyall 27
It's a song."Mr. Roboto" by Styx.
LiamCD02 12
You should have joined in with them and beat him up aswell!
Pixelatedpotato 28
Glad I'm not the only one who thought of that
beeferjay 34
you should just leave his ass somewhere and take his phone and cash... let him sweat for a minute
MidnaLink 35
A phrasebook and knowledge of sentence structure, two things you really need to have for vacations in non-english speaking countries.
noonenoeone 22
Or a phone and google translate
MidnaLink 35
Either could be acceptable. I've never seemed to go wrong with GT.
Jackimo98 24
That would require a phone and data that both work in that country
ChinchillaLady 27
You can use WiFi for the translate without taking your phone off airplane mode. That way you can use it to translate with out getting huge bills for messages and calls.
ObiWan21 2
Seriously? in almost every country English will help a lot. Maybe not possible to have a convo about nuclear physics though
jengo54 16
The ultimate weeb...