Miscellaneous: Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her...

By ugh annoying - 01/07/2011 07:41 - United States

Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 189

You deserved it 3 976

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Same thing different taste

Bad influence

By BigSister - 13/09/2009 18:19 - United States

Today, my 15 year-old sister came home at 4 a.m. totally stoned. My parents treated her really nicely and woke me up. I'm now grounded until I go college for being a bad influence. I volunteer at schools to talk about drug abuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 035

You deserved it 3 398

By Anonymous - 08/08/2019 20:00 - United States

Today, my drunk sister threw up on me while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 102

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 04:11 - United States

Today, I discovered my sister has a crystal meth problem when she set fire to our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 296

You deserved it 2 620

Far out, man

By shroomda - 29/06/2009 07:29 - United States

Today, I called my dad to wish him happy birthday. The phone was disconnected, so I called my sister to see what his cell phone number was. She then informed me that our dad was in jail for selling shrooms to teenagers at a music festival out of state. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 231

You deserved it 3 403

Revenge

By Natasha - 20/02/2021 21:30

Today, because I wouldn’t let my little sister have any more cookies, she snuck into my room while I was sleeping and superglued my lips together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 077

You deserved it 116

Affectionate, huh?

By littlemiss - 10/02/2013 16:17 - Canada - Whitby

Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 653

You deserved it 3 048

By Anonymous - 28/08/2013 21:29 - Canada - Oshawa

Today, I caught my sister eating crayons. She's 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 760

You deserved it 3 155

Jumping the gun

By just lookin out - 31/05/2023 03:00

Today, I saw my sister’s husband kissing another woman in a restaurant. I lost it, flipped their table, and got the cops called on all of us. Turns out they’re poly and she’s their third. Or she was going to be. My sister is now mad at me for “scaring her off”. My bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 481

You deserved it 1 196

Whooped

By leah - 16/10/2019 22:00

Today, I was standing in the shower drying off when my sister came in the bathroom. She must have thought I was a burglar because she hit the shower curtain and punched me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 459

You deserved it 138

By Anonymous - 27/06/2019 00:15 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 174

You deserved it 222

iLazy 0

Friday 1 July 2011 15:56

Blame Mario for spreading the shroom trend

YayorNay 8

Friday 1 July 2011 15:57

More like FYL, her books were trying to eat her face.

Comments

Kimbi82 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 11:57

The comments to this fml we better than the actal story! Loved it :D

bluebird0020 2

Saturday 2 July 2011 12:15

More like SHE Deserved It.

sj101990 3

Sunday 3 July 2011 9:04

so you think this is a FYL because you couldn't hide your sister's illegal habit from the cops?

justnotwright 0

Sunday 3 July 2011 15:25

that the kind of great stuff that happens to junkies.

Ur1Temptazian 0

Sunday 3 July 2011 16:12

hahaha I couldnt stop laughing after reading this one

spacemonkey420 0

Tuesday 5 July 2011 6:07

dam sounds like she had penis envis. I like those crazzy trips

scr_sensei 14

Tuesday 5 July 2011 21:05

fake

budd28 0

Wednesday 6 July 2011 4:37

cool

dubya1925 2

Saturday 12 November 2011 19:03

i would love to do shrooms, but sadly i dont know how/where to get them. :( oh but i do have one question: what did the cops say?

SamDream 3

Saturday 19 November 2011 5:24

YDI if you weren't on drugs you wouldn't have this problem

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The Top

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 057

You deserved it 2 533

Today, my boss made me run yet another stupid errand. When I delivered the paperwork to his office, I saw an email printout on his desk. Apparently, he has a plan in the works to get me "fried" next month. I'm not sure whether to give him a letter of resignation or a bottle of barbecue sauce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 360

You deserved it 2 739

The Top

Today, I began worrying I have social anxiety, all because while getting dressed I convinced myself that everyone would talk about me behind my back if I wore a striped shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 338

You deserved it 344

Today, I’m on vacation in Ecuador in a small youth hostel. My Skype interview for a prestigious marketing Masters would have been perfect if a hippie hadn’t come near me to play the ukulele while smoking a joint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 617

You deserved it 107

Today, I had to break up a fist fight between two female residents. I work in a retirement home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 754

You deserved it 3 426

Today, I tried to contact my birth mother, who abandoned me when I was three weeks old. After months of tracing, I finally plucked up the courage to call her. She told me to "f*ck off and die". FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 489

You deserved it 7 605

Today, I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool for his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer for real. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 562

You deserved it 24 481

Today, I was sitting at my computer, listening and singing along to some music. I started singing louder, thinking that I was pretty good. Just then, my mom comes barging through the door in a frenzy saying, "Are you all right? Are you hurt?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 046

You deserved it 14 754