Love: Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday.... - FML

By assante2010 - 24/07/2011 00:09 - United States

Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 350

You deserved it 6 883

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 538

You deserved it 2 916

By BMTH2296 - 21/03/2014 23:42 - United States

Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 397

You deserved it 8 420

By bluntedone - 03/02/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was trans-night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 035

You deserved it 52 142

Quite the gamble

By Anonymous - 25/03/2011 19:25 - United States

Today, to celebrate my older sister's 21st birthday, my parents forced me to take the night off work so we could all go to the casino. Not only is this coming out of my vacation, I wasn't old enough to enter the casino, so I had to sit in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 824

You deserved it 4 435

By obese_chicken - 06/11/2009 06:59 - Australia

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 056

You deserved it 8 325

By abc - 27/05/2009 10:15 - Pakistan

Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 415

You deserved it 5 360

By happy bday - 17/09/2010 04:02 - Canada

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I am now in charge of driving my friends home after they had an awesome night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 993

You deserved it 9 389

How can I make this about me?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 098

You deserved it 163

By azmom - 27/03/2012 17:51 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 315

You deserved it 26 211

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 023

You deserved it 4 325

Next

Top comments

BIEBERSLAYER 10

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:22

please tell me you didn't get a lap dance from her.

HahaYDI 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:24

Did you get some sort of family discount?

Comments

marianasgirl 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 18:38

did you at least give her a tip?

LuhDemDinosaurz 6

Sunday 24 July 2011 18:44

If that was my sister. I would have been like. "Mom and Dad don't have to know. As long as you know. 50% of this goes to me."

LuhDemDinosaurz 6

Tuesday 26 July 2011 7:36

of the money.

skizzlerz 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 18:46

How? :D

maddie2015 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 18:54

that's sooooo awkward!and embarrassing for up both!!

kkkaylyn08 4

Sunday 24 July 2011 19:24

lol.. damn.. tht blows.. x)

24myLifesucks 3

Sunday 24 July 2011 19:35

Oh, God. That's awkward... and disturbing...

Persephone1001 3

Sunday 24 July 2011 19:37

Every girl in a strip club is someone's daughter/sister etc. I have no problem with strip clubs as long as the employees aren't being exploited, but if you're going to go to these places and feed the industry, it's kind of hypocritical to get upset when your own female relatives work there. The only way this is an FML would be if she actually gave you a lap dance. YDI.

ryan41297 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 19:40

your sister must be hot

RokNRoll11 9

Sunday 24 July 2011 20:06

did she see you

EpicLovee 2

Sunday 24 July 2011 20:21

betcha wish you never went now huh?

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Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Awkward Shopping My ex Racism Family Relatable Kids AITA Love Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Mental health Health Psychology Cops Neighbours Stressed out Scary Parents

The Top

Today, I have accidentally encountered my parents having "sexy time" four times in the past week. I'm an adult. My parents are in their fifties. Their bedroom door doesn't fully shut, so I always get an unpleasant glimpse when I walk past, occasionally punctuated by my mom's pleasured moaning. Kill me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 610

Today, my grandpa forgot that my aunt set up a baby monitor in his bedroom in case of a fall. I’m sitting in the living room with his wife - who is deaf - and I hear him moaning over the baby monitor. My grandfather was jerking off and forgot that someone could hear him. I wish I could forget too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 658

You deserved it 130

The Top

Today, I fell off my desk chair. Why? I failed to notice that the screws I'd been finding on the floor around my room for the past few months belonged to said chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 499

You deserved it 32 006

Today, I found out that I need to get a root canal, the only day I can get an appointment is on the same day I'm flying out for training for my new job. I can't get out of either, so now need to face my fear of flying and fear of dentists the same day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 828

You deserved it 1 389

Today, my dad was in town for a day. We only had about 3 hours to do something so we left right away. Right as we were about to leave my dad's slutty girlfriend came by for a "surprise visit". My dad told me he would be right back. They had sex for 2 hours and 45 minutes. In total, we talked for 15 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 009

You deserved it 4 185

Today, before work, I was quickly cleaning when I tripped and the side of my neck hit the countertop, causing a dark bruise. During work, people wouldn't stop giving me high fives for getting laid and I was too embarrassed to tell them truth that I'm not desirable, just clumsy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 420

You deserved it 3 767

Today, I realized that the only food I have is four months' worth of nutrisystem food from when my parents went on the nutrisystem diet. I am not able to secure a job and buy my own food, so I have two choices: die of starvation or die of nasty nutrisystem food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 407

You deserved it 8 969

Today, one of my baseball teammates thought it would be funny to perform a "cup-check", by hitting our crotches with the end of a baseball bat. I was actually watching the game, so I didn't see him when he came up and hit me. I wasn't wearing a cup. My nuts have shrunk by half of regular size. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 560

You deserved it 12 422