Love: Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying we're too different.... - FML

By PunkChik27 - 12/12/2011 04:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying we're too different. His only example? He likes ham and I don't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 120

You deserved it 4 465

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Same thing different taste

Is this dude a puma?

By Anonymous - 04/04/2020 02:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 440

You deserved it 1 504

By ohman - 02/10/2010 06:28 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because 'I look like his hamster when I'm eating sunflower seeds.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 592

You deserved it 5 859

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 06:13 - United States - Brookfield

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 196

You deserved it 2 145

Gamers rise up

By Anonymous - 19/04/2021 12:00 - Romania - Orsova

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after 2 years of being together. The reason? I don't enjoy playing video games as much as he does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 933

You deserved it 179

A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do

By Anonymous - 08/08/2022 04:00 - Canada - Garson

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He said it was because he wanted to 'do his own thing'. So gaming 24/7 like he has for the past two years of our relationship, then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 762

You deserved it 200

By Anonymous - 15/04/2013 16:02 - Norway - Trondheim

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He wants us to stay friends, though, so he can continue to use my coffee maker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 169

You deserved it 4 719

Better late than never

By nice is not enough - 27/11/2021 22:59

Today, I had to admit to myself that I’m not attracted to my boyfriend on any level. I agreed to go out with him because he's a nice guy, but the reality is we have absolutely nothing in common. Not to mention, we have the sexual chemistry of a vegan and a bacon cheeseburger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 1 038

Alexa, play "A Man Needs a Maid" by Neil Young

By Anonymous - 28/07/2023 10:00 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend after concluding we're not compatible at all. He said he knew it all along, but he thought I was "good for all the house stuff." FML

I agree, your life sucks 757

You deserved it 131

By Jackie - 12/07/2011 07:14 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me using the "it's not you, it's me" speech with a slight variation, saying instead, "It's not me, it's you. And yes, I meant to say it that way round." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 360

You deserved it 6 125

By nottelling7012 - 29/08/2010 04:21 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend of six months broke up with me because of 'creative differences', as she put it. The real reason is that we couldn't decide which cupboard the plates should have gone in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 025

You deserved it 4 408

Next

Top comments

yumlicious 4

Monday 12 December 2011 8:43

HAM IS AMAZING. I would have broken up with you as well!

schpanki 11

Monday 12 December 2011 8:44

Valid reason. For real though, if he cant even tell you what is wrong, he doesnt deserve you.

Comments

bubo_fml 10

Monday 12 December 2011 13:03

"I do not like green eggs & ham, I will not eat them, Sam I am!"

bubo_fml 10

Monday 12 December 2011 13:05

Keep it Kosher!

GLiseeyy 1

Monday 12 December 2011 13:18

Oh My God, Just over that!!! I can't believe it.

effedml 5

Monday 12 December 2011 13:44

Maybe he always pictured his future holiday meals with a nice ham for the main course? You're ruining Christmas, OP!

yusaku02 20

Monday 12 December 2011 14:03

How can you not like ham?

MCuss 1

Monday 12 December 2011 14:04

Awesome comment

baygirl564 9

Monday 12 December 2011 14:50

You'll find someone better, keep your head up

sjhill 32

Monday 12 December 2011 14:55

What's up with ham? bad experiences?

perdix 29

Monday 12 December 2011 15:00

That was the only difference? So either both of you have penises or neither of you do?

MsCane 6

Monday 12 December 2011 15:06

When people break up with you over stupid stuff like that, take it as a blessing and move on. I'm pretty sure it's not actually about ham but he could at least have the decency to come up with something better than that.

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The Top

Today, I had sex with someone new for the first time after my 10 year relationship ended. The person was a friend who had been making serious sexual references toward me on and off over the year I've known him. I don't know if I'm more embarrassed that he couldn't keep it up, or that I came from anticipation anyways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 282

Today, I found out my psycho ex also reads FML. She called me at work, pissed that I'd "publicly humiliated" her on here. I haven't posted about her at all. I'm sure the brick I found thrown through my window a few hours later has nothing to do with her, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 736

You deserved it 1 428

The Top

Today, my friends wanted to try to dine and dash at a McDonald's. I had to explain why that wouldn't work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 634

You deserved it 202

Today, while returning from a class, I stopped to use the bathroom. While in said bathroom, someone threw a chip bag filled with piss water into the stall I was using. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 759

You deserved it 344

Today, I really had to pee at work and rushed to the urinal. I unzipped but couldn't find the hole in the front of my boxers and ended up pissing my pants. I had put my boxers on backwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 459

You deserved it 3 696

Today, I asked about 30 students and 3 of my teachers to sign my yearbook. So far, only my math teacher agreed to write in it. He wrote, "You need to try harder next year." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 416

You deserved it 1 778

Today, my boyfriend complained that we may not work out because I'm "just too needy". I'd woken up early and texted him "good morning" while he was trying to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 736

You deserved it 9 660

Today, my boyfriend is coming over. We haven't seen each other for a while so for a surprise, a few days ago, I decided to shave my pubic hair. I've come up in a huge rash that looks like some sort of infection. Not quite the sexy surprise I was hoping for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 724

You deserved it 6 890