Kids: Today, my 4 year old cousin is staying overnight. Every time... - FML

By Braelynn - 26/01/2011 07:48

Today, my 4 year old cousin is staying overnight. Every time I fall asleep he wakes me up to tell me I fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 193

You deserved it 3 783

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Same thing different taste

Rising Damp

By Anonymous - 18/10/2021 17:00 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, while I was asleep, my three-year-old cousin wet the bed again. MY bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 106

By Lickmebaby - 12/02/2017 11:00 - United Kingdom - Enfield

Today, I woke up to see my 8-year-old cousin licking my hand. All of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 744

You deserved it 511

Little shit

By Anonymous - 28/10/2010 04:44 - Canada

Today, my little cousin is going to be staying at our house for a year or so, because of financial problems. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that every single night he creeps up on me while I'm sleeping, and shouts, "GO FUCK YOURSELF!" directly into my ear. Only another 11 months to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 578

You deserved it 3 503

Sleepless in Singapore

By Anonymous - 30/07/2022 10:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I was having trouble sleeping due to jet lag. I was finally sleepy and looking forward to a decent night of rest when my 4 year-old woke up and refused to stay in his room or try to rest. The next two hours involved him shouting at me, kicking me, and crying because he wanted Daddy, who is on a business trip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 801

You deserved it 192

Halloween came early

By umm..WHAT?? - 22/10/2020 14:01 - United States - Pomona

Today, I was sleeping in my bed when I woke up in horror to see that my 34-year-old cousin, who was spending the night, was watching me sleep. Once he noticed that I was awake, he quietly left the room. I told my mom, who then told me not to tell anyone and pretend that it never happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 595

You deserved it 87

Early wake-up

By Bir - 08/12/2019 14:00 - Nepal

Today, my nephew grabbed my balls to wake me up at 4 AM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 781

You deserved it 168

How sweet

By Birdman - 23/06/2018 15:00

Today, my 3-year-old fell asleep in our bed while cuddling me, and I let him stay since he was being so sweet. In the middle of the night, he took off his pants and pissed all over my head and back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 722

You deserved it 787

By purpletrout - 30/11/2016 06:39 - United States - Lansing

Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got him to sleep, I tried to go to bed. My husband is now snoring, farting and taking up my side of the bed. I desperately need some sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 407

You deserved it 1 130

By kids are meh - 16/05/2016 21:47 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, I told my cousin it would be okay if he stayed the weekend after a fight with his wife. He didn't tell me he was bringing his 4 kids. They've watched funny cat videos for hours and they laugh like maniacs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 124

You deserved it 1 352

Helpless

By Anonymous - 11/01/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my husband actually helped put our 4 year-old to bed because I was watching my nephews, who were about to be picked up. When I was sitting with my nephews in the living room, he yelled for me to help with our daughter. I said I couldn’t and he told me to shut up. I put her to bed every other night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 516

You deserved it 127

Next

Top comments

Mortanious 0

Wednesday 26 January 2011 12:09

That's cute, but till him to go to sleep too and make up a story on why it is important for him to sleep before you; kids love stuff like that. Of course don't tell him about something along the lines of Dead Space 2.

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 26 January 2011 12:03

Slip the ****** some Nyquil. Or, you know, lock your door and go to sleep.

Comments

mickkiei 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 3:17

SAMMEEE HEREEE!!!!

FML858 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 4:42

awwwwe.whatta cutie! he want you to do an all nighter with him !

KeefB 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 5:03

If you beat the shit out of him, then he will stop.

Aniblecoby 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 6:13

Aw that's what my 6 year old cousin does when he sleeps over haha

ieatbebies 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 8:15

tell him that the awake ppl eating monster will get him if he doesnt go to sleep....thats what i do 

92jess_2010 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 12:35

awe, that's soooooooo cute! lol 4 yr olds are toooo adorable!

tchaikovsky93 0

Thursday 27 January 2011 13:12

That is so ADORABLE!!! Hahahahaha

winterbite 0

Friday 28 January 2011 3:21

lmao!!

meeba 2

Friday 28 January 2011 4:46

slap "it" thats what I do

k9obsessed 5

Friday 28 January 2011 10:34

Sorry to hear you're losing sleep, OP, but I think you need to grow up. Little kids do stuff like that all the time. They don't know any better.

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The Top

Today, after taking my girlfriend on a date, she invited me back to her place for "hot coffee and dessert." Excitedly, I said yes. When we got there, we actually had coffee and dessert. When I told her this wasn't what I'd had in mind, she kicked me out for being a pervert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 155

You deserved it 68 072

Today, we were supposed to go on a weekend camping trip with our Scout troop. On Thursday I wasn't feeling well but I made it through school okay. Dad forced me to pack up immediately after school, even though I felt worse. I threw up on the porch on the way out. Dad thinks I did this on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 46

The Top

Today, after growing tired of my friends group leaving me behind every time and having secrets between them, I started to ignore them and stopped following them, without saying anything. They haven't spoken to me since, and it's been 7 months. I'm alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 619

You deserved it 137

Today, I was doing my nightly check of my daughter's phone since a recent stint in the psych hospital, and saw that she had fallen into a peaceful sleep to watching videos on a website dedicated to watching people die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 558

You deserved it 145

Today, I discovered my boyfriend enjoys anime, just like me. I discovered this when he said he wanted me to imitate and dress up as an underage character from his favourite anime next time we have sex. When I refused, he got upset and said he thought I would understand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 115

You deserved it 529

Today, I learned that the "nasty smell" in my room, which I cannot detect, does not exist. It was just my stepmother trying to make me go insane deep-cleaning my room for her personal amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 074

You deserved it 272

Today, I'm trying to sleep off a cold as my roommate plays video games in his adjacent room. He doesn't rage or get excited often, and he can control it even more if he really needs to, but it's still enough to keep me painfully awake, along with my cold. Every minute feels like an eternity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 190

Today, while showering, I finished off the shampoo bottle. I decided to see if I could shoot it into the trash can over the shower curtain. When I heard the successful "thunk", I got so excited I slipped and cracked my head open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 849

You deserved it 19 992