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#1 you sound like an idiot. but anyways, OP, this is not an FML because you embarrassed yourself infront of your crush. Your life does not suck. You deserved it for thinking it's an FML.

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I'd say stop eating sausage rolls fatty! but you're in France so maybe you aren't fat like most of the sausage roll eating Germans and Americans, lol. so I give up ;)

Brush your teeth after you eat, and don't eat unhealthy crap like sausages, they make you fat. If you get fat, your crush will not talk to you ever again and you will be single and fat. Then you'll have to post an FML about how your jeans can rip because they can't hold your lard in.

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