Miscellaneous: Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When... - FML

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 627

You deserved it 34 414

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Same thing different taste

By FailedEngineer - 20/10/2009 21:31 - Australia

Today, I lost my house keys while staggering home drunk, so I decided to climb through an opened window and promptly went to bed. Twenty minutes later the police wake me up while attempting to search my place. The neighbors thought I was a burglar and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 266

You deserved it 35 648

WTH happened?

By Anonymous - 05/10/2009 05:11 - Canada

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking in my backyard. All I was wearing were my boxers and one sock. I staggered up to see my car halfway through my garage wall, with a note saying, "Sorry dude". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 372

You deserved it 42 541

Party girl

By Abby - 11/11/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I got wasted at a party and went out to my car to get something. I went back to the house and realized I got locked out. After knocking on the door, ringing the doorbell, and shouting "LET ME INNNN" my friend called and asked where I was. That's when I realized I was at the wrong house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 079

You deserved it 39 588

By Anonymous - 05/07/2019 05:58

Today, while we were in a hotel, I got so drunk I apparently couldn't find my room, and passed out in the corridor. I woke up to see hotel staff calling security. FML

I agree, your life sucks 667

You deserved it 2 015

By Anonymous - 28/08/2019 00:01 - Australia - Darwin

Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 1 858

By constantine - 29/08/2010 04:47 - United States

Today, I wanted to go clubbing with my friends. I started drinking at home to save on the price of drinks, instead I fell asleep on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 561

You deserved it 36 133

Partaaaaay!

By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 18:16 - Canada - Kelowna

Today, I woke up after passing out at a very small house party. I'd set a three drink limit, but apparently nobody listened, because there were beer cans everywhere, half my stuff was on the floor, and someone had shat in my bathtub. I had to clean all of it up alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 124

You deserved it 46 969

By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 195

You deserved it 587

By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 988

You deserved it 23 997

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 803

You deserved it 4 714

Next

Top comments

CharliesCool2084 8

Thursday 31 May 2012 23:04

How did you get in?

vhivfe 3

Thursday 31 May 2012 23:02

Awkward...

Comments

Parisgirl34 12

Friday 1 June 2012 1:00

lol

Roflsauruz 12

Friday 1 June 2012 1:21

Weird. Some strange guy was on OUR couch when we got up one morning a little while ago... :/ hmmm.... You should PROBABLY open your eyes a little wider, no matter how pissed drunk you are. Or, have someone escort you. Either way, crashing in someone else's house by accident is unacceptable. Sorry, dude.

lil_jazy7 0

Friday 1 June 2012 1:21

Dang dude bet u were ******

hurrican_fml 0

Friday 1 June 2012 1:29

Who woke you up?

c8750 2

Friday 1 June 2012 1:35

That's what I want to know. If OP woke up on their own or if it was the owners of the house. Would make a much different ending

pavlovaaLOVE 7

Friday 1 June 2012 1:39

That happened a few years ago when my stupid brother didn't lock the front door after he came home late one night. In the morning I went downstairs for a breakfast in front of the TV and saw a random guy laying on the couch. I nearly pissed myself in shock

soccergurrll 8

Friday 1 June 2012 1:51

The awkward moment when you wake up and have no idea where the f you are.

RoseCrystal 17

Friday 1 June 2012 2:08

a girl in my hometown went into the wrong house while drunk. the homeowners shot her and she now faces a felony and prison time.

horseridermc 2

Friday 1 June 2012 2:23

We're there people in there when you woke up?

corleon198425 22

Friday 1 June 2012 2:23

Winning

jayfreeman80 0

Friday 1 June 2012 2:43

Oh - so you just happened to have a key to let yourself in?

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You deserved it 642

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You deserved it 5 509

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Today, the spiders in my house are so big that they catch wasps in their webs. FML

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