Alcohol, Cars, Computers and Transportation: Priorities

Priorities

By Earths_Venus - 19/11/2009 22:31 - Australia

Today, I was driving to my new home with a lot of my belongings in the car. I could hear things shifting in the back. When I parked, I opened the door, ready to catch my vodka. I caught it - and watched my laptop slide out of the car, onto the concrete, and break into 3 pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 798

You deserved it 35 708

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Same thing different taste

By wheatsnake - 08/10/2009 13:31 - Australia

Today, I took my new laptop into my house from my car, thinking it would be a too much of a target for kids grabbing it. I came home tonight to find my door kicked in, my laptop gone and my TV ripped from the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 171

You deserved it 2 813

By Sad - 28/04/2009 22:13 - United States

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 218 413

You deserved it 15 326

By 1000dollarspoor - 07/10/2009 09:25 - United States

Today, while working on my laptop, I accidentally spilled a glass of water. I quickly moved my laptop out of the way of the oncoming stream. It fell on the floor and broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 865

You deserved it 10 075

By nice one - 14/07/2013 17:51 - United States - Athens

Today, I got home from a week-long vacation with my friend's family. When I got back home, I found the garage door had been completely demolished. My uncontrollably drunk dad blamed me. I don't even drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 787

You deserved it 2 743

Ninja move

By kiran - 24/10/2009 04:19 - United States

Today, I went to the post office. As I entered the building, my car alarm went off. Thinking I'd accidentally pressed the alarm on my keys, I shut it off without looking. When I returned to my car, the passenger window was demolished and my purse with all my money was gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 070

You deserved it 39 635

By stop thief - 26/06/2014 15:11 - United States - Aurora

Today, someone stole my laptop from my car. However, they were nice enough to relock the doors after they smashed in the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 033

You deserved it 6 092

Delicious

By MYLIFESUX - 12/04/2009 06:50 - United States

Today, I was sitting using my laptop, while eating a bag of Starbursts. The bag slid off the bed, so I went to catch it and in the process my knee hit my laptop, which flew off the bed onto the wooden floor, and shattered. I broke my laptop to save 11 Starbursts from falling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 199

You deserved it 56 941

By Anonymous - 15/12/2010 05:48 - United States

Today, I couldn't get into my car. In an attempt to get in, I broke a window. As I climbed in, the actual owner of the car walked up. Mine was across the street. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 431

You deserved it 46 300

By amayasoma - 12/08/2013 18:54 - United States - Houma

Today, I went to my car to get a few things, when I discovered it had been broken into. Nothing of value was taken. My window was busted in just for a pack of cigarettes, a lighter, and my car's ashtray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 636

You deserved it 7 021

Transit

By Anonymous - 13/11/2009 02:43 - United States

Today, I sat right next to the door on the bus. When I went to get up, a man tripped and pushed me down the exit door stairs. I fell down and broke my ankle. While tending to my ankle, the bus doors closed and my backpack with my laptop, notes and calculator drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 874

You deserved it 2 374

ItsAshxD 0

Friday 20 November 2009 1:43

Well, at least you saved the vodka, because now you can go drink away the pain.

k43L1 0

Friday 20 November 2009 1:42

laptop case. buy it. use it. love it.

Comments

Hurly26 0

Monday 9 May 2011 5:06

Nice sense of priorities :)

Exculpated 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 9:50

U made the right choice! The laptops harddrive can be salvages but there's no licking that vodka off the ground. Lol

Lennes 12

Friday 17 June 2011 14:50

at least you have your vodka.

goneawol 1

Tuesday 26 July 2011 16:40

thank god the vodka was ok

HeXr 22

Friday 26 August 2011 20:04

Your packing priorities or life priorities. One of them is off I think

Lulicah 3

Tuesday 4 October 2011 15:26

That's what laptop cases are for.

powpowell 2

Tuesday 8 November 2011 16:22

VODKA!!!!!!!! Good decision SAVE THE VODKA!!

Impulseforyou 6

Wednesday 9 November 2011 6:09

Save the booze! ;) Sorry about your laptop though. :/

lsd_25 8

Monday 26 December 2011 19:21

dude the booze is totally more important

arielzbkny 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 3:33

Maybe u should have ur laptop next 2 u in the passenger seat in a laptop case....

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The Top

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. The help-line told me, "Don't touch the door. We'll be there soon". Two hours later, I had a headache, my legs were stiff, and my date must've thought I stood her up. The tech finally arrived, pries the door open, then rudely asked, "Why didn't you do that yourself?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 451

You deserved it 3 567

Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 655

You deserved it 127

The Top

Today, the eye doctor told me I only had 90% vision on my left eye, and asked if I wanted treatment. Not being terribly bothered by it, I asked what the treatment would consist of. "We'll stick a large needle in your eye, and pump in some medicine." I quickly wished him a pleasant day and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 949

You deserved it 183

Today, a fly got stuck up my nose while I was giving a speech. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 659

You deserved it 2 622

Today, I went on a Tinder date. He seemed pretty normal. Very handsome, and a complete gentleman. Turned out he's a white supremacist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 187

Today, my girlfriend told me that our relationship and economic situation is stressing her out so much that she’d rather end her life or marry a rich dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 122

Today, my thoughts are filled with fantasies of pleasuring my boss under his desk, to the point where it distracts me from job duties. I take a break and wank at work, and then I return to my normal way of thinking and how much I love my wife and how happy I am. Lust really can blind someone to what is important. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 444

Today, I was giving myself a breast exam for lumps. I heard laughing, looked around and saw that the 12 year-old neighbor and his friends were watching through the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 032

You deserved it 12 489