Let's get it on

By None of that means consent to sex - 08/04/2026 14:00 - United States

Spicy
Today, I told my husband that I didn't feel like sex. He said, "Funny, I didn't feel like driving to the store for your milkshake earlier, or digging up the flowerbed, or deep cleaning your car, but I did all that to make you happy. Don't I deserve a little reciprocation?" Jesus Christ, I married an asshole. FML
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copalolita 14

What’s with all these misogynistic men thinking relationships/marriage are transactional??? You should do something to someone out of LOVE not because you’ll get sex. Married or not. No. Woman. Owes. You. Her. Body. Respect her “No” or get a SA charge. (FYI coercion is a form of SA)

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Morten Bork 5

would she have respected a no if he said he wouldn't have done those things? don't lie. be honest? she would have used sex as a negotiation tool. she herself would have told him. he would be sleeping on the couch. men are taught this behaviour by women. women expect, privilige. and offer nothing but sex. then are shocked when the one thing offer, is requested. every notice, how women attract men with scantily clad clothing, makeup, fake boobs, fake eyelashes, fake nails, making sex, the driving forcing behind their connection to a potential mate. and are then shocked when men think all she offers is sex? yeah, lady, that the product you advertised. want affection? want loyalty? want a gentlemen? you have to be the woman that attracts that type of man.

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SAgirl 18

No the women don't "owe" men their body, but then they also complain that the man is watching **** because the woman never wants to have sex.

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copalolita 14

If a man thinks of me as a “pornstar” or their personal blow up doll, it’s not a man worth having.

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stickyface 16

I'm sensing a theme here, copa. On another recent post where the wife was explicitly transactional regarding sex, you defended her. Now you're destroying the husband for even implying a quid pro quo, and stating outright he needs to serve her out of love without expecting any reciprocation. Which is it? Or is it just sex that's forever off the table as a means to serve one another, and it's okay for the wife to weaponize sexual access? What would a healthy marriage relationship look like in your world, including sex? (FWIW IMO, neither of the scenarios in these two posts is healthy.)

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copalolita 14

A healthy marriage and sexual relationship is one where both parties WILLINGLY CONSENT. Any form of coercion, sulking at boundaries, not accepting “No”, or saying “I did X thing so you should give me sex” is not consent by any stretch. If your partner does not want to have sex, respect their “No” Also, just because one person is married to another does not mean sex is an obligation. Both people reserve the right to their bodily autonomy. Its about consent and respecting boundaries.

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stickyface 16

That's a decent definition, if all you're concerned about is lack of coercion. But how do you fit in transactional behavior and holding out sex as a reward instead of a mutually satisfying and loving activity? Mutual consent isn't sufficient to define a healthy sexual relationship; it's a prerequisite but not the only prerequisite.

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copalolita 14

So if your partner wants to have sex you should oblige because “it’s a loving/satisfying activity” am I picking up on that correctly? Bodily autonomy doesn’t matter? And of course CONSENT should be the only prerequisite. Anything other than that is r@p3 which is far from a healthy sexual relationship.

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stickyface 16

Where did I say bodily autonomy doesn't matter? I said mutual consent is a prerequisite, meaning it's a requirement and not negotiable. But it's not the only requirement. You're still silent on weaponizing sexual access and treating it as a commodity or a reward. Deliberately withholding consent in order to control or punish the other is not at all healthy, which wrecks your contention that consent is the only prerequisite.

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slapstick1982 20

I’m guessing you’re single

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Nikki 17

It’s concerning how misogynist these comments are, what the post doesn’t mention is who does all the family management? When you constantly manage everything, asking for simple tasks to be done feels like equalizing the load (it’s not) and definitely not like the man doing a favor that deserves reward (it goes without saying consent can be taken away at any point for no reason)

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