orely44
Rez, France
Today, after about fifteen minutes of my cat bullying me into letting him get onto my lap, I finally caved. He clambered on, turned around, farted in my direction and got off as fast as he got on. FML
Top comments
ironichalibut 24
Cats can often be assholes, and assholes often fart. The equation was right in front of you, just under the surface. You could've prevented this.
perdix 29
I can visualize the cat saying, "I fart in your general direction" in an outrageous French accent. They oughta make a movie like that!
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Comments (166)
HKCgrimmjow 15
Heh stop being such a pussy!
PenguinBitch 43
Can we Hamsterians (hamster owners btw) and our plastic roll balls join this fight?
enbliss 10
the cat felt that he/she didn't feel appreciated so it did what people would do
DyslexicPanda 12
A dog may fart in your face, but at least he'll sit there with you and bask in the glory of it.
G97Alex 21
No, just no.
Strider207 5
At least the cat didn't leave a cat-ass-trophy
happle 21
Poor thing probably farted in your face because you don't give him enough attention. I'd kill to get affection from my cat.
jelly713 19
Not true, too much affection makes them just as mean. Depending on how grouchy the cat is.
KayleeT 9
Since when do cats fart on you to get attention? Mine just meow.
Life_sucks_13 6
Honestly me too mine likes to run. =
Synistiel 14
It can actually be annoying to want constant attention. My cat almost never lets me be alone, meowing as loud as she can whenever I am in the bathroom, school, in another room, even in the same room when I'm not petting her or holding her. They can be clingy creatures. :I
luckyd880 12
You people need to get dogs if your that starved for pet affections lol
outoftown 26
39 - My cat did that. A friend told me her dog did that after the dry food got mold and upset his stomach. I didn't smell mold, but got him fresh food; problem solved.
Eaglestrike117 29
Would you kill your cat? Because that would defeat the point.
Catkam623 27
Your definitely pussy whipped.
Catkam623 27
You're* my bad
ManInTheMachine 19
Doesn't change the quality of the comment.
Catkam623 27
I was just trying to save myself from the rain of grammar Nazis about to come after me
Welshite 39
Grammar Nazis don't patter softly like a gentle drizzle. They swoop down upon you; descending like half-crazed vultures. They feed off your misery and revel in your pain. Most of their victims are lucky to escape alive. You corrected yourself just in time.
Catkam623 27
The birds of grammar.:)
seacadet 18
HEIL SPELLCHECK!
DanielleinDC 33
Unfortunately, spell check won't catch if you used a possessive pronoun where you should have used a contraction.
Catkam623 27
^Here we have the not so uncommon ... English teacher
Bubbelz 25
That depends on which spell check is used. However, self-correction deserved a thumbs up at any time.
DanielleinDC 33
#87, I'm not an English teacher, just a grammar snob transcriptionist.
Catkam623 27
A scribe?
lambda_fml 40
Top Cat.
Jac_d_ipper 10
**** *******, they always behave like *****...
SomeRandomGuy15 18
The most effectual Top Cat!
Catkam623 27
Jack that word is disgusting and I'm not even female
kthuts 7
For the record Jac had an awesome point. Sadly, nobody else will see the humor in it.
Bubbelz 25
Which word are you talking about? Is it "behave"? Or "****"? If you truly cannot face these terrible words, please refrain from plugging in your computer's power cable. Now unplug it. Save your soul!
ironichalibut 24
Cats can often be assholes, and assholes often fart. The equation was right in front of you, just under the surface. You could've prevented this.
ALlamaOnFire 20
Is that why you own a tiger instead? :')
ironichalibut 24
29- When I was a kid and I got him I was insanely excited, we did everything together. I remember sharing my deepest thoughts and feelings with him. Through the years we've fought and made up more times than I can remember, he's my closest friend. I'm older now though, and when he tackles me when I get home I just can't bounce back like a kid, and his giant tiger farts are just horrendous.
SomeRandomGuy15 18
30- You just made me want a pet tiger...
kierakismet 5
Your picture is a cat...
WildaRora 43
Which proves he knows what he is talking about.
padajuan 11
Cats are assholes. The sooner you realise this and start upping your affection and annoying it to get revenge, the better.
gracehi 31
Your face is an asshole. :P
1R1X0X0 10
Something must be wrong with you..
nico16_fml 6
douche
samcro3 8
Time to quit buying the cheap cat food....
klovemachine 24
Meow Mix...the food cats ask for by name...MEOW :-D
outoftown 26
Or too much good stuff in bulk. Dry cat food can get moldy and cause farting.
VannahJane 17
Cats are brilliant yet evil
igive 29
The cat is trying out for Monty Python. "I fart in your general direction!"
kait11 16
It makes you wonder what really goes through their minds... Maybe the Egyptians were onto something
DyslexicPanda 12
World domination duh.. don't you watch movies?
gc327072 30
And that's why I hate 98% of cats.
HowieDoIt 21
Do you like 2% because it resembles milk or something?
gc327072 30
No, I've encountered precisely 100 cats, and I liked 2 of them.
mmaflake 19
Dogs> cats
ManInTheMachine 19
58: Please don't start this infantile debate. We might as well be "screaming" our political views at each other for the next hour.
gracehi 31
SEQUESTRATION IS A GIANT CONSPIRACY!!! Oh, wait, that was a "no" on doing that. My bad.
RaspberryCookies 6
#65 it's not a debate, it's simply a well known fact. Dogs, if well trained, are reliable and obedient. All a cat does is piss and shit and mess everything up, on top of make annoying naggy noises all day because it's being selfish... No matter how good you "train" it. Sorry if you can't agree.
SpazTheGreat 14
Aww, how cute, you like "training" things to be "obedient". We've recently been adopted by an outdoor cat who, while absolutely loves to force his way in our house, is the most docile cat I've ever meet. Incredibly "well-behaved" and is perfectly content just being in the same room. However, he loves his stomach being rubbed.