Today, my parents told me that I'm no longer allowed to come home from boarding school on weekends because it will confuse my cats and disrupt their lives. FML
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Today, my mum sat me down for a serious talk about not being home enough - not because she misses me, but because the family cat needs more stability in her life. FML
Today, I told my parents I really missed them and wanted to come home for the weekend, as I haven't seen them in months. They told me that was a bad idea and they couldn't fit me into their schedule. I asked what their plans were. They said they didn't have any yet. FML
Today, since my parents always told me that I was welcome to come home whenever I want or need, I decided to stop by. They'd changed the locks and wouldn't let me in. FML
Today, my parents decided to finally kick me out of the house because they've gotten tired of seeing me "sleep around all day and being so lazy" whenever I'm home. I'm currently triple-shifting for 6 days a week. FML
Today, I'm gonna have to make the very difficult decision to ask my roommate to get rid of his dogs. They're not only the most disobedient little shits I've ever known, but they're also terrifying my cats. My oldest cat, who has always been pretty chill, quiet, and independent, is now vocal, clingy and nervous. FML
Today, my father called me cruel and heartless. Why? Because while I was at school, our dogs opened the door to my room and managed to shut themselves inside all day without food or water. FML
Today, my parents threatened to take away my college funds. Why? Because I complained about my 10 pm curfew during break as a freshman in college. FML
Today, my parents had me pet-sitting their cats again, since they were going to be gone all day. I noticed their oven was on and wanted to turn it off, but when I do they always yell at me because they "had plans for dinner." This time however, they yelled at me for NOT turning it off, because they'd already ate. FML
Today, my neighbor let me know that they've been taking care of my cats while I was away, including letting them in and out of my house. I don't own a cat. FML
Today, after returning from taking my sister off to college, my parents told me that our house would be a lot quieter with my sister gone. Not because she's loud, but because she has friends and I apparently don't. FML
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Top comments
mangoboy1 19
You're parents are dicks.
XxDevilxXGt 26
They've cat to be kitten you..
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Comments (98)
mangoboy1 19
You're parents are dicks.
peopleequalshet 10
Your* -_-
mangoboy1 19
Sorry in my attempt to be first comment I completely forgot about grammar.
gc327072 30
Hey props for being diplomatic about it.
iammeorami 25
grammar Nazi strikes yet again!
SWhimsynBubbaS 14
More like ******* ._.
tjv3 10
So your parents sent you away to boarding school and then got new cats and now don't want you to come home because it will confuse the cats? I just wanted to write it all out to make sure I got it right. Basically they replaced you with fur balls and are abandoning their responsibility of raising you and letting a school raise you. Yeah I don't see how this will not have a lasting psychological effect on you. Sorry op
tjv3 10
Oops I read it wrong dang it. Scratch my earlier post
lambda_fml 40
I have a feeling the parents meant the Other pussy. ;-)
Odyy_fml 7
lol no, she's in freakin' boarding school, so that means she's a brat and doesn't deserve respect (as clearly she doesn't show it).
kozzard 17
that's not the only reason for boarding schools...they're actually effective education institutes
dmoran20 27
Really #75 you know this how? Regardless, I guess they'd rather be called a brat than some know it all little troll bitch But hey, we are who we are huh?
Odyy_fml 7
I know this because that's why anyone goes to boarding school - for being little assholes. Everyone I've ever known has that in mind when threatening to send their kid to boarding school. As for education, you send them to a private school, so there's no other explanation for going to boarding school.
XxDevilxXGt 26
They've cat to be kitten you..
Damian95 16
Oh come on meow that's just purrfect.
AustinCarlile01 12
they need to quit lion about how they feel.
lambda_fml 40
umm...have fun with the ******* at the school instead?
FMLKitten 15
Sorry for being a sourpuss, but these puns have got to stop.
1215116a 14
FMLKitten is getting offended guys, we're discriminating him and his culture.
HeartOfLead 24
I was actually expecting FMLKitten to cough up another pun...
EnterSandman_fml 20
Well don't be a pussy, tell them your opinion. At the very worst this hairy situation would stay the same.
Iamevil123 16
The first sentence has a double meaning.
TheAbstract 15
@10 Does it really?
vadaaa 11
Sherlock solves yet another mystery
IlTiramisuEBuono 6
Actually, the pussy is one of the strongest things on the planet. After having kids, it still works fine. All men have to do is sit wrong and the penis breaks. Do not underestimate the Pussy!
still_guns 16
Hang on YOUR cats? They're stealing your kittys, ignore them.
1215116a 14
Kittys? Not to get on to you about spelling, but really, kittys? *kittens
blaackandprouud 20
Actually 71, in this case, if she said kittys, I'm pretty sure its kitties. But I guess kittens could work too.
iheartkanye 8
Mr. Whiskers just won't understand...
HeartOfLead 24
I hope that's not what OP's dad calls OP's mom's- well, must I go further?
Inediblepeaches 15
Well then maybe it's just not worth visiting assholes like them.
xblair 11
Cats are really starting to take over
wlddog 14
This is yet another reason people like dogs more then cats. Dogs are just happy to see you. They don't have their lives disturbed when you come home on weekends.
windfuelsfire 10
I thinks it's a lame excuse to finally be able to have sex on the piano, kitchen counter, sofa, without having to think about anyone's schedule but their own. Or they just don't like having you around :(
lmaouloser 5
lmaouloser 5
Well... You are disrupting a pussy's schedule. I just don't think it's your cat!
kinky44 28
Ha! Haha! Ahhhh... Not really though, that jokes been made a thousand times already.
lmaouloser 5
I'm comment 15, probably not 1000 times.