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Man or woman?

Today, the guy I like told me in casual conversation that I shouldn't get mad at him if he makes out with other girls at the bar, he only does it when he's drunk, that he doesn't really like them. We've been sleeping together for a week now. He met me at the bar. FML

#134877
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16121) - you deserved it (25104)

On 02/25/2009 at 5:05pm - misc - by seriously? (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I came home to tell my parents about my new nose job I got about a month ago. My mom always told me I should get one, so I didn't tell her right away to see if she would notice. I was home for about 20 minutes before she asked me, "so when are you getting that nose job?" FML

#134540
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37430) - you deserved it (5591)

On 02/25/2009 at 4:31pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend said that being with me was his payment for past sins. FML

#134361
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45586) - you deserved it (5185)

On 02/25/2009 at 4:12pm - love - by sadgf (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I told my boss I was bored of being a cashier and would rather go to food prep. He told me I couldn't because my arms were too hairy. I'm a sixteen year old girl. FML

#133390
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41053) - you deserved it (5000)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:15pm - work - by hairy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had the cops called on me because I accidentally texted "I'm going to kill you and use your head as hood ornament" to my ex-fiancé, instead of my best friend. I only texted that because he got a better grade on an exam than me. Now I have a court date. FML

#133313
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26619) - you deserved it (38423)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:05pm - misc - by Joe (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I emailed my boyfriend from work. Out of habit, I absent-mindedly entered my department into the "From" field. My boyfriend didn't notice when he replied. Now my entire department knows I want to "drop to my knees and suck him when I get home." And he plans to "finish on my face." FML

#133145
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12284) - you deserved it (61614)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:41pm - work - by foolishgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it stuck mid-floor. Being supportive, I went to hug her and tell her we'll be OK. Today I also learned that my girlfriend is deathly claustrophobic and her predominant reaction is to vomit. In this case, all over me. We were stuck for 2 hours. FML

#132840
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48166) - you deserved it (3067)

On 02/25/2009 at 12:53pm - love - by goingup? (man) - United States (New York)

Today, in art class we finally had the critique for the self portraits we've been working on for a month. We critique a few and come to mine. Everyone is silent. Finally, one girl says "I'm just going to be blunt. It doesn't look like you. You're not that pretty." Everyone nods. FML

#132596
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57302) - you deserved it (4709)

On 02/25/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by mylifeeee - United States (Virginia)

Today, I farted in my cubicle thinking no one would smell it. Two seconds later, everyone came to my cubicle to wish me a happy birthday. FML

#132176
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19027) - you deserved it (35241)

On 02/25/2009 at 10:31am - misc - by riappp (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, it was really cold and windy and I started my car before work. I locked the front door of my house and shut it behind me to leave. The wind was blowing and all my hair got shut in my locked front door... with my keys in my car's ignition. FML

Today, I forgot my work clothes at home so my boss gave me a jacket with a name patch that said "Mike". Still wearing my work clothes I ran into my ex-girlfriend on my way home. We were together for five years until she dumped me for a guy name Mike. FML

#131140
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36543) - you deserved it (3570)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:42am - love - by laf@me (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, a customer that I've been waiting on for years came into the restaurant after a long absence. I said to him, "Hey man, it looks like you lost a lot of weight! How'd you do it?" He replied, "I got cancer." FML

#131042
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49753) - you deserved it (8627)

On 02/25/2009 at 2:25am - work - by yawho (woman) - Japan (Tokyo)

Today, I was walking to a meeting and saw two girls trying to jump start a car in the rain. Thinking I'd be a gentleman and help them, I offered to assist. The girl whose car is broken down looks at me, looks at her friend, and says, "I think we'd better call the police." FML

#130566
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35224) - you deserved it (2474)

On 02/25/2009 at 1:19am - misc - by Godfree (man) - United States (Florida)



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