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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was mugged on my way to the bus stop. With no money or mobile I started to panic about the exam I had and ran the 3.5 miles to get to there. When I staggered up to the building only 20mins after the exam started, the university staff wouldn't let me sit it as I couldn't prove my identity. FML

#3022587
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53550) - you deserved it (2540)

On 06/19/2009 at 4:22am - misc - by verrine - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was finally going to fall asleep at a decent hour. Having insomnia, I generally get about 2 hours of sleep. Right as I'm about to fall asleep, 5 firetrucks decide to drive right in front of my house with the sirens/lights on. FML

#3021035
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42191) - you deserved it (4245)

On 06/19/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by insomniac (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

#3019033
275 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11646) - you deserved it (111063)

On 06/19/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

kscott88's comment : YDI for being psychotic AND stupid.

See all the comments →

Today, the weather was nice so I decided to eat outside. I quickly found out that my new, expensive hair conditioner attracts bees. Lots of bees. FML

#3017474
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41735) - you deserved it (6195)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:32am - health - by Stung (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went outside a friend's house to find that my car had been saran wrapped. I cleaned it up and went back inside the house. An hour later, I heard a doorbell ring so I went outside the house. They saran wrapped my car again. FML

#3017259
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41585) - you deserved it (5324)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:25am - misc - by bear92 - United States (Virginia)

Today, as a frog biologist I was out in the field searching for a relatively rare frog species. After three hours I finally heard the frog call and I crept closer and closer to the sound until... squish... I stepped on the very frog I was trying to collect. They're endangered. FML

#3017224
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51063) - you deserved it (17918)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by oops... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my older brother told me that no matter how fast you run at automatic sliding doors, they'll open in time. So I ran at a pair. They don't. FML

#3016666
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14881) - you deserved it (100107)

On 06/19/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by kat9232000 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was using the bathroom in a department store. When I was finished, I couldn't get the stall door open. I am claustrophobic and I freaked out and and started shouting for help. A 6 year old boy got the door open for me. It turns out I was pushing when I should have been pulling. FML

#3011337
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8872) - you deserved it (46614)

On 06/18/2009 at 9:33pm - misc - by ToiletTony (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was browsing my computer to find naked pictures of my ex-girlfriend. I decided it'd be funny to photoshop a penis onto one of the pictures. I'm straight and the new picture turned me on more than before. FML

#3007389
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11818) - you deserved it (59283)

On 06/18/2009 at 7:39pm - love - by AlexK (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I used my inhaler for the first time in a year. As soon as I took a puff I felt something strange go down my throat. Upon closer inspection I discovered there had been a spider living in the mouth of my inhaler... and I had just swallowed it. FML

#3006187
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45134) - you deserved it (7733)

On 06/18/2009 at 7:07pm - health - by asthmatic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the store to buy some groceries. While I was at the store, an employee came up to me and said, "You're beautiful!" When I came home I told my husband what had just happened. My husband then asked, "What was wrong with him?" FML

#2999612
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49416) - you deserved it (4987)

On 06/18/2009 at 3:40pm - love - by Ann (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, after a month of planning, I started to tease my boyfriend of 3 years about the wonderful anniversary plans I had made for us. It was a secret, so I let him try and guess. He said "As long as its not a spa day. that would suck I would never go." It's a spa day. That I've already paid for. FML

#2997595
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36799) - you deserved it (23608)

On 06/18/2009 at 2:34pm - love - by Lvdkinda (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was riding the bus home from the Verizon store after getting my brand new EnV Touch. I was taking pictures with it when I noticed a woman with very nice boobs. I zoomed in to get a better picture when she looked at me with a disgusted face. The external display was on. FML

#2997013
337 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6584) - you deserved it (88588)

On 06/18/2009 at 2:12pm - misc - by heythurr234 (man) - United States (Virginia)



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