Today, I took my dogs to an empty park. While they were running around, I laid down in the grass to read a book. Someone thought I was a dead body and called the cops. The police and paramedics showed up. This is the second time it's happened. FML
by tracie / 09/21/2010 at 8:00pm / United States (Kansas) / Animals
Today, I spent the entire day at school being called Meg. My name isn't Meg, so I started to get really annoyed and confused. Later, I found out it was because I look like Meg from the show Family Guy. She's known for being unpopular, unwanted, ugly, and stupid. FML
by Anonymous / 09/21/2010 at 6:47pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
TheIrishJaneDoe's comment : Shut up Meg.
Today, I was on my hour long bus ride home with a full bladder. Right as the bus reached my stop, the time I spent holding it in was over. I didn't make it out of the aisle before I peed my pants. FML
by forgotten / 09/21/2010 at 6:16pm / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML
by Anonymous / 09/21/2010 at 6:07pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/21/2010 at 5:28pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/21/2010 at 10:23am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML
by cganon / 09/21/2010 at 8:44am / United Kingdom / Kids
curzy's comment : assault. file a police report Lol.
by teardrops / 09/21/2010 at 4:50am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
by themildthings / 09/21/2010 at 3:10am / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Kids
by yourmom / 09/21/2010 at 1:46am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML
by awesome / 09/21/2010 at 12:49am / United States (Arizona) / Animals
robc32ca's comment : you sick moron.
by meowmeow / 09/21/2010 at 12:38am / Australia / Health
by kdgirl / 09/20/2010 at 11:02pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous