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FGum - 30/07/2009 05:56 - United States

Today, I was running on a soccer field and accidentally dropped my gum from my mouth. No one had noticed so I picked it up and started chewing again. It was a different flavor. FML

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87 881

Run away time!

CreepedOut - 09/03/2010 06:31 - United States

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

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Have some empathy

liz - - United States

Today, at work, I had toast thrown at me by an old Vietnam vet. Who also happens to have a dead cat in his freezer. I love retirement homes. FML

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Badass

batter--up - 17/02/2010 02:54 - United States

Today, in a sporting goods store, my mom was over on the other side of the store, when a cute guy came over to talk to me. When she saw this she grabbed a bat, walked over to us and said, "If you ever even look at my daughter again, I will beat you shitless." She was serious. He ran. FML

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2 712

I'm fine, this is fine

btg - - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

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