Today, as I was walking my dog around the block, I fell in the splits position on wet dirt and ripped my pants right on the front. I then had to walk home casually holding a chihuahua on my crotch hoping I would not run into anyone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Today, I finally did the splits for the first time in my life! Unfortunately, it happened when I stepped in wet dog poop on my kitchen floor. One foot slipped forward in it, and I fell right on top of it. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when I slipped on some mud and fell onto my ass. As I fell, I let go of the leash, and my dog just stood there, staring at me in what seemed like curious judgment. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store. I bent to get some dog food off the bottom shelf and felt my pants tear. My jeans split right across the back seam, showing everyone I was wearing a pink thong under them. I had to ditch my cart and leave as I had no way to cover myself. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he did his business. He then stepped all in it and coated his paws. As I was struggling with him, I slipped and landed butt-first into his steaming pile. My boyfriend nearly fainted from laughing. FML
Today, I was walking dogs for the animal hospital I work for. I accidentally dropped the leash, and in my haste to retrieve it, I frantically grabbed the ground. I got the leash, and a handful of fresh dog poo emitted from the dog I was walking. FML
Today, while dogsitting for a friend, I took their overly excitable dog to the park. The moment I unleashed him, he bolted, and I ended up chasing him for what felt like miles. When I finally caught him, I was covered in mud and my pants had a huge tear in them. FML
Today, while trying to pick up dog poo, I tripped and landed in the pile. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ScratchCatPower 32
"What... What do you need?" "... A tailor... BECAUSE I RIPPED MY PANTS AGAIN!"
ellisp1 15
What a dog-gone shame.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (42)
ssnow_fml 20
That probably looked very strange to anyone watching.
coolbeans26 12
So a straddle position I assume? It would be hard to do that in an actual split position
Soninuva 41
Thank goodness for man's best friend!
redscarf_fml 8
How did you fall in that position? Sounds hilarious but I know I would have been mortified. Sorry OP, FYL
Mynamewontfi 40
Good thing you had a chihuahua to hold in front of it in stead of a big dog. Imagine having to awkwardly carry a Great Dane around while trying to hide your crotch behind it.
SpiralButterfly 12
I LMAO at this! XD
nanner6206 24
wouldn't you then just walk behind the dane? It would be crotch height already.
delichick 27
Im now going to start calling mud wet dirt. Unless you werent wearing underwear, it was nothing to worry about. Hell Im sure a ton of people have ripped their pants one way or another. Ive done it at work once - right up the seam at the crack of my ass - had to wear a coat around my waste the fest of my shift and on the bus home
ChrisA12 6
Uggh why a Chihuahua?
yerawizardlizzy 27
Because that's probably the breed his dog is?? You make it sound like he had a lineup of dogs to choose from.
ThrottleJockey 36
Is that a chihuahua in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
JackDupp 11
And the chihuahua became a weiner dog...
SpiralButterfly 12
LOL
utrax 23
Considering your name is Eric, I kind of weel worse for the dog having to smell your dick.