When it's cold outside By Lewis - 12/12/2018 18:00 It's duck cold! I agree, your life sucks 255 You deserved it 63 Share Tweet Share
Today, my new boyfriend and I really wanted to have sex, but he went soft as soon as he entered me. This happens every time we try. I feel cursed by my year-long dry spell. FML I agree, your life sucks 36 920 You deserved it 4 548
Today, my co-worker told me that my other co-worker is in the process of getting a divorce. I got really excited because his marriage is very toxic. He overheard me say, "He deserves that divorce!" I meant it in a good way, but I don't think he took it that way. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 677 You deserved it 12 060
Today, my brother decided to join me on my first date. Not only did he answer the door with a bat, he also got inside the car and sat next to my date, pushing me to the back. He stayed the entire time, and walked me back to the house. My mom laughed and gave him $20. It was a dare. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 646 You deserved it 2 707
Today, I found out that because of my high blood pressure I can't have sex for one month. My wedding is next weekend and the following two weeks are my honey moon. FML I agree, your life sucks 267 759 You deserved it 28 655
Today, I went to put my coat on to go out. I put my hand in my pocket, not knowing there was a mouse sleeping in there. I squeezed it, it bit me and ran off. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 380 You deserved it 653
Today, my boss wanted us to fill out anonymous employee satisfaction surveys. The entire workforce, all 4 of us, just looked at him. How can a sample of only 4 surveys possibly be kept anonymous? He’d know who it was straight away from our handwriting. Man he must think we’re dumb… FML I agree, your life sucks 511 You deserved it 98