Today, one of my friends came over to go swimming in my pool. Before going back into the house, as it's all carpeted, I automatically took off my trunks, forgetting about my friend. I realized my mistake when my friend commented on my abnormally long foreskin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off, so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML
Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, at a pool party, I had forgotten to bring a swim suit, so I went in in my bra and shorts. After everyone screaming and telling me to put my shirt back on, I asked, "Why? It's the same as a bikini." My best friend told me it was because no one wanted to see me topless. FML
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to take our first shower together. When he came into the room, he had swimming trunks on. FML
Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML
Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching TV and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML
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Top comments
jbuckets_404 39
Yea, that's something that I wouldn't have commented on ie, admitted to having even noticed. Hope he's straight, dude! (Unless she's a she, of course....)
RichardPencil 32
Your friend is looking too hard at your dick. This person needs to leave the Friend Zone through one of the two exits.
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Comments (7)
jbuckets_404 39
Yea, that's something that I wouldn't have commented on ie, admitted to having even noticed. Hope he's straight, dude! (Unless she's a she, of course....)
Ben Taylor 16
why would you hope he is straight?
Henry8cooper 15
Because homophobic men live in a world, where homosexual men's only desire is to enforce their sexuality on straight men. Such a thing never happened to me through a semi-long life - so I am beginning to suspect that we're really dealing with homophobic men hoping for homosexual men to enforce their sexuality upon them - and thus fulfilling a fantasy.
Trinity Fenwick 7
no big deal. ..more for you to brag about.
RichardPencil 32
Your friend is looking too hard at your dick. This person needs to leave the Friend Zone through one of the two exits.
skippydoda 32
Next time someone stares at your dick long enough to notice your foreskin... helicopter.
BurnInDemonFire 39
You took off your trunks, but you forgot one was going to be on show. Unlucky.