Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years after finally realizing I'm a lesbian. He then outed me to my very religious and conservative family. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sadly had to tell my fiancé of 3 years that I realized I’m a lesbian and not really attracted to men, and therefore I called off the wedding. He decided to retaliate and out me to my very Christian parents, who are unhappy campers right now. “Unhappy” is an understatement. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 7 years broke up with me in a text message. Then I found out from a mutual friend that he "came out" and told everyone at our school that he is gay. He has known he was gay for years and he was just using me as a cover up. What a great way to start my senior year. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I found out he was seeing someone behind my back: my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me for a guy. I was the only one who knew he was bisexual. Now everyone thinks I "turned him gay." FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I had only been dating him for about a month. Thinking he wouldn't take it very hard, I invited him over so I could tell him in person. Little did I know he was going to start crying on my couch and not leave for 5 hours. FML
Today, my wife of 6 years came out as a lesbian. I moved out of state and away from family to start a new life with her. Turns out she's attracted to my mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I cut my hair short and he didn't want people to think he was gay. FML
Today, I came out to my therapist as gay. Claiming that my parents "can't be that homophobic", my therapist outed me to them. They kicked me out of the house. FML
Today, I found out that the guy I've been dating for a year is and always has been gay. I was apparently "an amazingly convenient beard" for his ultra-religious family. FML
Today my ex-boyfriend came out as gay. My family were like, “It’s about time! Oh honey child, we knew he was a major queen the day you brought him home, that’s why we let you share a room on sleepovers. No way was he going to try anything.” It’s true, we dated for 5 months and I’m still a virgin. FML
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Top comments
Chazzster 32
OP, I can see a little of both sides. After going with you for 5 years, his girlfriend breaks up because she’s finally discovered she’s a lesbian. Obviously he felt betrayed and possibly used. Outing you to your family was wrong, but people do things when they feel hurt and possibly betrayed. And from your side, you finally come to this realization about your sexuality and break up with your long time boyfriend who betrays you by outing you to your conservative family. Of course it’s not entirely him but your unaccepting family who are actually causing you the most grief. One way to look at this is the cat is out of the bag now with your family and you no longer have to dread the revelation - because it’s here now. OP life is usually long, give your parents a while to process this revelation. They may come around to acceptance. In the meanwhile try to find support where you can.
DanielleinDC 34
You just don't out someone against their wishes. OP didn't mean to deceive her boyfriend; she came to realization about her sexuality. What he did was horrible.
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Comments (10)
Chazzster 32
OP, I can see a little of both sides. After going with you for 5 years, his girlfriend breaks up because she’s finally discovered she’s a lesbian. Obviously he felt betrayed and possibly used. Outing you to your family was wrong, but people do things when they feel hurt and possibly betrayed. And from your side, you finally come to this realization about your sexuality and break up with your long time boyfriend who betrays you by outing you to your conservative family. Of course it’s not entirely him but your unaccepting family who are actually causing you the most grief. One way to look at this is the cat is out of the bag now with your family and you no longer have to dread the revelation - because it’s here now. OP life is usually long, give your parents a while to process this revelation. They may come around to acceptance. In the meanwhile try to find support where you can.
DanielleinDC 34
You just don't out someone against their wishes. OP didn't mean to deceive her boyfriend; she came to realization about her sexuality. What he did was horrible.
Yusuf Nyle 6
OP is cold and heartless! You don't just wake up a Lesbian one day.
rotflqtms_ 21
Not everyone knows right away what gender they like. Some are in denial, some don't realize until they meet someone of the same gender who they fall for. Some believe what they feel IS love until they feel the real thing. Some are attracted to the opposite gender in some way, but realize that they are more attracted to the same gender. Some are bi. sorry that not everyone knows their sexuality from birth, especially with very religious parents where that couldn't even be an option in their minds growing up.
marktime100 4
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Deciding you aren’t getting enough attention and becoming a lesbian after you are together 5 years? That was the least he should do.
BeefyQueefy 14
Ah, the fragile male ego...eat a bag of dicks
nemcali 34
People do not decide to become gay or lesbians. They are born this way! If OP comes from a very conservative family, it probably took her a while to accept who she is and probably hoped until now that it was a temporary phase etc.
bloopaloop 27
So your ex is a d-bag. Besides that, did your family throw you out and disown you? Prefacing them with “religious and conservative” implies that was what you want readers to expect, but are you giving them a bad wrap? I bet they took it ok.
RichardPencil 32
He's pissed off that he turned you gay. It's going to be difficult when he has to tell the next girl how he wasted the past 5 years.
BeefyQueefy 14
A person can turn gay about as much as you can sound intelligent; it just doesn't happen
RichardPencil 32
It's doesn't look good for her either way. If she knew she was gay, it was cruel of her to jerk this guy around for five years. If five years with this guy made her realize she's gay, what does that say about him?
rotflqtms_ 21
it kinda said she just realized... Takes some people longer than others to figure that out. It probably took finding the right female for her to even realize she was attracted to females. She probably felt content with him at the time thinking what she felt was in fact love and attraction... then she finds the real thing and rather than stay in a doomed relationship even longer or even worse, cheat, she broke it off. Honestly, she owes him nothing if she wants to break it off. If one of them isn't down for the relationship, it just doesn't work. Forcing a relationship just ends in resentment. You'd rather she stayed with him longer even after realizing she didn't love him? Even after realizing she didn't love his gender? That he was 100% wrong for her? Now, had she stayed and cheated on him, I'd be calling YDI...but she didn't mention cheating. she said she broke it off with him... He shouldn't have outed her. That's her responsibility, not his.
BB_Skylar 22
What a dirtbag... i hate people that find fulfillment in being bitter and ruining lives to make theirs better. Idk if it's your thing, but know that according to Dante the 8th and worst circle of hell is reserved for betrayers...
Yusuf Nyle 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You deserved it. You broke your boyfriends heart. What's wrong with you. How do you just wake up and claim you are now a homosexual? It doesn't work like that. And whatever happened to "PRIDE" you say your a homosexual and ashamed....??? Sounds like a personal problem.
whatev71 5
I did the same with my bf of 4yr for the same reason and he outed me to my pastor father
AmbrosiaFan 19
You never tell them why, and now you know why... screw your family if they don't accept you...
Robert Cruikshank 7
Ok, so now your out. Now you can start working through this with them instead of hiding. He did you a favor really.
vchan 20
There is also another possibility : he outed you by mistake, either he didn’t know you hadn’t told everyone or he was so upset he didn’t watch his words. I did that once about a family member : everyone around me seemed to know, i grew up knowing and didn’t see a problem with it so during a dinner a few years ago I said something like « is my (female family’s member) girlfriend also alright with it? » (i would have asked the same for an hetero couple). Sadly i learned that she wasn’t « out » per se....... i felt soooooo bad about it. I phoned the person i dined with a few hours later, explaining my mistake and asking not to spread the information further. Seems like she said nothing so far. I don’t like this family member (because of her personality not because of her sexuality) but i still feel bad about that years later.