Today, while working at a certain California theme park in full costume, I was approached by a kid in line, who looked at me and exclaimed, "Hey look, its Indiana Jones!" which felt pretty amazing. His sister, who was maybe seven years old, glanced over at me and said, "No, he's way too fat." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, even though I'm overweight, I was feeling alright about the way I looked in the historical costume I'm required to wear by my job. A little kid came in and asked me if I was having a baby. Guess I don't look as good as I thought. FML
Today, it was Halloween, and I was giving candy to kids. When a group of kids who looked like they were around 4 years old came up to me and said, "Hey mister, do you have one of those things that make it look like you are fat under your shirt?" I didn't have one of those, but I lied and said, "Yes." FML
Today, I was working as a character at an amusement park. I was walking with another character and we went over to a baby girl. She smiled and laughed at my co-worker. When she saw me, she started screaming and crying. FML
Today, I was at Disneyland with some of my friends. While eating lunch, we watched a small child get frightened by the person dressed as Mickey Mouse. We all burst out laughing only to be jumped by Chip and Dale. Apparently I scream louder than the little kid. FML
What? WHAT?
Today, while at a hotel for vacation with my brother and his wife, I was watching their two month-old daughter in the waterpark when a woman came up to me and said, "Aww, your kid is so adorable! Don't worry, you'll get your figure back in no time." I'm a fourteen year-old girl. FML
Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML
Nerd
Today, I got approached by a hot young lady in a bar. After joking around for a few minutes she said, "Hey, I love your jacket, where'd you get that?" I then told her that it's actually a replica of the Indiana Jones jacket. This is when she remembered that she "had to go somewhere." FML
Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML
Today, a kid looked at me, screamed, then ran away yelling "Chewbacca!" FML
Today, my son was looking through old photos and showed me a picture of myself and asked who it was. When I told him it was me, he responded by saying "But mommy, the lady in the picture is not fat!" FML
Top comments
rukusrazor 0
#2? How was Raiders of the Lost Ark a fail? You mean Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? That one George Lucas nuked the ******* fridge on.
thunderbrave 0
WERE you Indiana Jones? maybe you should invest in a Wii Fit or something. gotta keep that name as respected as possible... especially after that Raiders of the Lost Ark fail, he needs all the help he can get
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (61)
jaimesmiles 0
a "certain" california theme park? why not just say disneyland? hahahaha
kennedygirl 2
Cast members rock. Just saying. I love that place.
24788 7
lol, they played you.
Pointy130 0
don't kids say the darndest things?
jessxoxo28 5
lol!!!! sorry, but i couldn't help it kids can be like that
juicyfruit23 0
my fav part is "which felt pretty amazing" haha!
itsneverlupus 0
I love Indiana Jones / Harrison Ford. Even if you are a little over weight, I'd probably stalk you. In a good way.
MadHattress330 0
He's not actually Indiana...he works the attraction...they haven't had an Indiana Jones character in about a year. You rule for even being willing to work there. Don't hate your life because some stupid little girl called you fat. Be more excited that a little boy called you Indiana Jones. Always look on the bright side of life, my friend.
christpuncher 0
**** disneyland.
jewelzgalore 0
I LOVE Disneyland!!! :D